CBT

I initially felt sad reading about their plans. Then I realized for so many people it's a part of the change process. Then I was wondering how it has changed over the months and years for the majority of vets. I wondered how people who had funeral or binges leading up to surgery *struggle* with food post op over time. Or if like some of you said, I eat to live; not live to eat.

My relationship with food is so different now. I used to use it to relax at night. Like, my kids are in bed now I can finally eat. Now I don't care about it, think about it, unless I'm trying to meet Protein goals for working out. I don't even go out to dinner or lunch very often. I prefer to meet friends and walk. I still feel overwhelmed and sometimes sickened with the portion sizes at restaurants. Sometimes I have to leave the family dinner table.... I have more thoughts but I'll save them for tomorrow. I'm pretty tired tonight. Thanks for responding.

Fiddle some people do guilt better than they do grief. You mentioned both. I think you have made a hard decision after much thought and gathering of evidence to support your decision. You haven't acted impulsively. You finished CF.

Still you continue to feel mixed about it.

This is the duality of two things being right at the same time. Westerners aren't very good with duality. "Give me this or give me that." "Only one is true."

Anyway, I think you just recommitted to your self. I agree with so much of what's been said above.

I offer you this: all feelings have a function. Just like behavior serves a function. The function of guilt is to keep you in line with your personal values. If you attempt to breach a value, you will feel guilt.

Okay, so if you believe it's wrong to lie and you think about lying (thought) you will feel guilt (feeling). That corrects behavior.

In your current situation you want to ask your self what value of yours it is that you are breaching. Also, whose rights have you violated?

If you can not answer these questions then what you are feeling is not guilt but inappropriate guilt. You're taking on responsibility for something that isn't yours...I do not know what that is.

You have a tremendous amount of support on this board. I'm so glad you put it out here.

Was just reading a preop thread and came across people talking about scheduling food binges/funerals before surgery. Reading about it now, I'm wondering, if you did/didn't do this how has your thinking about that behavior changed now?

Just to be clear, I understand the function of this behavior, so I'm not asking for an explanation as to why ppl do it but how you see it in hindsight.

Isn't that site helpful?!

As for very painful. I always hesitate because pain is so personal as well as the coping skills you bring to manage the mental part.

So far, all my pain and discomfort has been highly manageable.

I did what they told me which was to stay on pain meds and muscle relaxers at the top dose for 72 hours. I also use a lot of ice. I think my early post op pain is from swelling. I had myself packed in ice for the 48 hours. So, no I haven't had unmanageable or uncontrollable pain. Also, you're pretty numb.

The first hour post op is when I have the most pain because they are trying to stabilize me and figure out my pain. After that nothing uncontrollable. But even that first hour you're so out of it, the reality of the pain is diminished/altered. (This is true for all of the surgeries I've had except for the sleeve. I was painful every two hours after the sleeve until the concerns about bleeding passed and they gave me a shot of ibuprofen.)

I am interested! Thank you for posting the link. I am 99% using the app which is soooooo limited; although, I hear the app is improving Spring 2014.

I think that's what stalls me out on progress pics as well. They are hard to get. I don't have long arms so I take terrible "selfies". I have to edit the photos to be appropriate to this site. But I just realized I have bikinis! Duh.

Thank u for the advice!!! Idk if its too much what I'm getting done at once or is it normal? My ps says it's gonna be ok but I think I'm just very nervous. I'm getting Tummy Tuck Lipo and some of the fat is gonna be inserted into my buttocks. So I'm gonna have a flat tummy and a big booty!!!! Lol im scared but excited at the same time

That's a pretty routine amount of work at one time. From what I've read, that's not at all too much.

Have you been on Realself.com? You can post concerns there for plastic surgeons to comment on. You also can review hundreds of procedures. Pretty complete site. Similar to bariatric pal.

It's totally normal to have fears and nerves before surgery. I think you can let go of the anxiety and allow yourself to be excited

Some of those Brazilian butt lifts are crazy!!! Is that what you're getting? Doesn't sound like it. I would be curious to know how does someone get comfortable after a BBL and TT? I bet they don't combine those two cause you can't sit on your butt...rambling. I'll go ramble somewhere else.

Jane! You look happy and joyful in that cocktail dress!!! Not to mention you rock that dress.

I think your scars look great for 4.5 months. Thanks for posting an update with pics.

Funny thing about posting progress photos. When have you progressed to the point you want to post photos? KWIM?

I was concerned about the risk. I learned the warning signs and symptoms and that helped me. Also I have no history of clots. It's helpful to be in good cardiovascular health. Let the doctor know you're worried s/he will talk you through it.

Hi deedadble.

Having recently gone through consultation, ITA with previous poster. All doctors are different. They don't vary widely but they will tell you want they need to give you the outcome you want. So it's a good time to go for consult. My plastic surgeon said I could not lose one more pound. It's not just about what you weigh but the condition of your skin and skin versus fat, etc. I think you'll find consult helpful. Let us know! Excited for you

Post op Days 6 & 7

Yesterday, day 6 was shaping up to be pretty uneventful. I put a whole rusted chicken in the crockpot so my family would have dinner and then spent the rest of the day eating and laying in bed. For most of the day my apatite was insatiable.

Drains had really slowed down as had swelling. I got myself showered and out/in my binder all by myself!!!

Around 6pm my DD said she had a sore throat. Gave her Advil. she woke up at 10 vomiting and didn't stop until 1am. Bless her. She's much better today. Laying on the other couch watching movies. Low grade fever. So that brings me to

Post op Day 7

I'm terrified to eat. I put myself on a liquid diet. I can't think about how much it will hurt to vomit like she did. Now, DH intuitively cleaned her and everything up so I'm probably being some what irrational :-0

My BFF took me to my post op nurse appointment. I'm having some nerve pain in my back incision. It's manageable but annoying to get comfortable. Ice is helping.

Anyway, appointment went fine. Tape came off sutures, stitches came out of belly button. Two of my 3 drains will come out by Friday. The central drain probably will be in until next week. I think having the left and right drains out will help my back pain. That's only instinct talking.

Nurse said suture lines are closed and look great. Belly swelling will become puffiness and hang around until about 12 weeks when the lymphatic channels have healed.

I'm freakin small, y'all. I can't visualize what I will look like once the Fluid is gone. I will be completely flat! But not my boobs. OMG. they're swollen and high. They will drop into place around 5 weeks. The sutures are tight and holding them high.

Long night and morning. The sun was out so my BFF took me for a 10m walk outside. Now I'm hangin out opposite my DD watching fairy movies. #lifeisgood #hungrybutafraidtoeat

Sassy makes a valid point about fat. There is the fat that we see in our skin and then there's the fat that is packed like insulation in and around body cavity space, in organs (fatty liver) and marbled in our muscles. It's not just the weight they can "see".

I'd love to see research on the idea that metabolism will triple post op. Not challenging you, this is just a curious thing to hear. I've had several major surgeries and never was this mentioned as a side effect.

Her comment falls squarely within the context of our conversation. She told me I could not

lose another pound before surgery. She asked what caloric intake was. She needed to know how much I was working out and what type. She explained the metabolic needs to recover with my goals. She was trying to reassure me that I would not gain weight by eating and being inactive. Her experience is that WLS patients emotionally struggle to eat enough postop to promote wound healing. She also was asking me to trust her so I did not lose too much weight in recovery. It was a long and involved consultation.

So I don't think it's a typical conversation for a general surgeon or cardiac surgeon or a orthopedic surgeon to have unless you ask. They will tell you to eat and the demand for calories and Protein is high but they tend to say vague things like "you need it heal" "you need your strength" etc. Probably won't get into metabolic rate. Only us WLS patients get hyper about it :-P

I will say the night nurse was a bit freaked when I asked for yogurt at 7pm and then a turkey sandwich at 3am. Lol.

I must admit I am probably a pretty shallow person because I don't think health reasons would have been enough to get me to have the surgery and change my ways. I was a relatively healthy obese person but miserable with the way I looked. I got the surgery for vanity but there is no doubt it has improved my health too. For the first time I am looking forward to going on vacation with friends this summer. I am even considereing a 2 piece bathing suit. Who would have ever thunk it!

Rock that 2 piece!

Where did you hear that surgery speeds metabolism?

My plastic surgeon told me my metabolism will triple post op in order to heal. I had circumferential lower body lift, mastopexy and breast augmentation. It takes a lot of nutrition and rest to heal these procedures. But the Circumferential LBL is the big deal because it involves large sections of the lymphatic system, separation of facia from muscle, tissue trauma, etc.

Thank you for your post...i am in the process of finding a surgeon. it is a good idea to let him decide where I need to be. I am supposed to see him before July....

I think given your current situation, sooner is better than later for consult. What is it about July?

Also I forgot to mention that my PS said the other thing they take into consideration is how much more weight you'll lose while recovering, because even though you are inactive, your metabolism triples to heal you so you will lose weight in addition to the skin and/or fat the surgeon removes. They like to have room for that to give you best results.

Hi RJ!

I have so many thoughts about this issue. I'm 6 days post ops plastics after losing 135#. I am a little loopy but I thinky points will come across.

Are you hungry? Eat more. Like previous poster said. High quality foods like avocado, etc.

You do need to eat well before and within 20 minute after finishing a work out.

Half a bar is not enough if you are working out for 45 minutes or more.

As an example, I eat half cup oatmeal with 2/3 cup soy milk and an egg over the two hours before I workout.

The bar sounds perfect post work out.

I would expect your body composition to change as you add muscle/lean muscle. You lift weights to protect lean muscle in weight loss, primarily. (Your goals can change around this in maintenance) If you don't eat enough, your body will metabolize (eat) your lean muscle. (Lean muscle includes your heart and other vital organs.) If you train like an athlete you have to eat like an athlete. They too are paying very close attention to body fat.

I think family members and close friends go through their own changes. They have years of different body markers for us and our change is dramatic. They need to trust you and your team. It's hard because they worry.

The scale is but ONE tool we use to evaluate wellness. Don't let them get fixated.

A consult with a plastic surgeon will (should) give you a lot of information about your current body. S/he will tell you what you need to do and the state your body needs to be in for surgery but more importantly to wound heal and recover. And ultimately to get the best result.

We have a hard time seeing it objectively because the hanging and lose skin just feels emotionally/psychologically like a fat suit that's too big. A plastic surgeon can visualize the outcome. Sounds like you are very close and need that info. 5 pounds is a lot in plastic surgery. That's what my surgeon just removed. Visualize 5 pounds of hamburger. It's a lot of skin which is denser than hamburger.

Hang in there. Keep talking with people but trust your instincts. This is your body, your journey. You're the driver who get to decide who is on your bus.

Post op day 5

Well I'm certainly sore from having to poop. That was awful. I'm on a new narcotic. My drains were running more red this morning. Tonight they've cleared up again. No doubt some bleeding from that which I will call The Event. I was tapering the other narcotic and had it pretty low but have had a pain set back secondary to The Event. Not a big set back. Totally manageable.

I have 3 drains. My middle drain is giving me some grief. Well at least I have something to do with all this laying about. Anyway, it's not holding it's suction and sometimes it is holding it's suction. Seemed random. Anyone have this problem? The PA will call me tomorrow to follow up on The Event so I'll ask. I have post op Tuesday.

I am using ice pretty much nonstop. Swelling is reducing fast. I'm grateful for that cause swelling while in compression is a hot mess.

I didn't eat great today. I'll eat more Protein before bed. No apatite. Probably secondary to The Event. So I tried to eat by the clock. It's gross to eat when you're not hungry. What I did eat was good. chicken and black Beans, mainly.

No walk outside today. I did some art and watched some House of Cards.

Oh! Oh! I got myself out of my binder for my shower! I got myself back into it only half way then needed help. I'm okay with that.

I'm still shocked by my body. As the swelling goes down I shake my head. All that skin is gone. I can't wait to dance!!! I am excited to go to yoga and hold a downward facing dog with out flying my skin flag. That was just emotionally hard. I cannot practice yoga in compression so I said a prayer for the person on the mat behind me and held my pose. Now, no distraction. I can see this in my not so distant future. For now, I lay prone.

One last thing. I can side sleep! What?!?!? I know.

So thankfully this has been an Uneventful, Eventful Day. Now I will go eat.

Ps. Seriously about the drains. Anyone?

You're doing great! Just don't get cocky like me, That's how I ripped stitches in the middle of my front and middle of my back. It's prolonged my recovery. Thank God for Laptops!

Oh no! How'd you rip stitches? How far into recovery did that happen. I bet that was/is an oozy mess. Ugh. Nothing necrotic, though?

My Iron was fine He just gave me a boost for a few weeks to get my energy back.

Sounds like it worked fast! I'm fighting the Constipation monster so thinking about taking iron makes me hurt

I spent alot of time on Facebook and this site, playing solitaire.

I like solitaire

Post op Day 4!

I'm plodding along. I can stand up straight, get in/out of bed, get up/down from chairs. I move slow and I get sore if I stand around.

I went for a 15 minute walk outside today. On the way back my abdomen tightened up and my right side had mild spasm. Glad I was at my front door. I took a nap :-)

Still showering on my own except for the garment.I can't get in or out of it without assistance.

I have full range of motion in my arms. Feels the best to wash my hair! No pain. No limitations there. Seems strange since my pec muscles were cut and stretched....

I do swell but I prefer ice to medications so that is helping move the Fluid. I slept with ice packs the first 48 hours. After 72 hours I started ibuprofen. I'm getting good Protein.

The poop story is bad. I think the narcotic I'm taking is a grand offender and notorious for Constipation. I'm hoping it's all behind me now. Yuk yuk. Behind me.

The change is astonishing. I can't imagine what I'll look like one month from now.

Maybe i'll post some progress/drain pics. Ewwww. Post op is Tuesday.

Take home message: ice, ice, baby and range of motion.

Doc put me on high dose of Iron last week. Since then I can't sit still. So I'm looking for stuff to do. Still can't bend all the way over. I'm now an expert at picking things up with my toes and keeping a pair of long tongs handy! How ya doin?

Was it routine blood panel that showed low Iron? I'm glad you got your energy back. Sometimes healing is so textbook. When the doc says 6 weeks, it's like 6 weeks to the day and I'm all good. Lol. Power of suggestion? Mind over matter? Probably just biology of healing.

I am great other than no poop I'm taking some heavy duty laxatives and still nothing. Drinking a lot. Eating Fiber. Doing all the things I'm supposed to. It'll happen I'm just getting uncomfortable and bloated. I'm going for a walk while the sun is here. Maybe that will help!

Here are some TV shows that are always entertaining to me. NCIS, Doc Martin, and King Of the Hill are some suggestions. Happy Healing, Sweetpee

Thanks for this! I haven't seen any of them.

1 day shy of 5 weeks. Got my jeans on! Still swollen, but got em on!

Nothin like getting your jeans on

Congratulations! How's your energy level?