pussnboots

I finally had to bite the bullet and go shopping as my pants almost hit my ankles at work the other day! May I just mention thank god for goodwill? I have absolutely NO desire to spend $20 on jeans that wont fit in two weeks. Also Walmart has decent $5 plain t-shirts so while I am in no way fashionable, at least I don't look like a hobo anymore!! It's bad when even your boss starts giving you hints that maybe you should go buy some new clothes! All told I got 2 pairs of jeans, 1 pair of shorts, a new bra, and 3 shirts for $53 bucks. Yeah I spent extra money on the bra, but I'm a firm believer that the ladies have to be slung high and comfy! *grin* I've been washing clothes and sorting them for the thriftstore over the past several days and my walk in closet is looking verrrrrrry anemic!
 
I will say that I was scared to go shopping and was thankful that my BFF went with me. Isn't that hilarious? I have enough guts to move on my own to places where I know nobody, fight in martial arts against huge muscle-y guys, and have this surgery but shopping scared me?! After some thought I realized I just felt so overwhelmed at how much stuff I really need. Literally from the skin outward I not only had no clue what size I was anymore but what I should wear. Don't get me wrong, I have very decided opinions about fashion but being..err...plumptious for so many years I often just had to dress in clothes that I would not have chosen if there were other options. It was kinda funny because my BFF had made a comment that with my laid back style I should be able to find lots of clothes as I get smaller. I told her that she had never actually seen my preferred type of clothes because they didn't make them in my size and that I thought she would be very surprised. I don't think anybody really realizes how girly I would dress if I had a choice! I can't wait for that day when I can go into any store and realize that I can fit in their clothes. It's already happening as I'm down to a size 18 in pants! Still big, but thank god no longer a tight 24!! I'm also super excited that I lost a cup size and 4 inches around my ribcage.
 
When we went shopping it was just supposed to be my BFF and I but her husand decided to tag along. It was kinda funny because when he asked me if it was okay I told him that yeah, it was fine but that he wasn't allowed to b***h and moan after 45 minutes when he got bored. That I had to get clothes and we would be going in and out a ton of stores and it might be a good idea for him to bring a book. Which he did and was very thankful for, although to give the man props he didn't complain over the entire 5 hour ordeal.
 
It's hard to believe sometimes how much my life is changing, and I'm so thankful that I could just kiss my doctor!

Wow!! Today marks a 50 lb loss...the most I have ever lost in one sitting...and the weight continues to melt away....I am excited when I meet up with friends and family who havn't seen me in a while who compliment me on how thin my face looks and even my own brother says he can see the loss in my waist line....
 
Easter was a challenging day! I got up early and quickly whipped up 3 pumpkin pies and a chocolate cream pie. I put the big ole' ham in the oven to bake with a brown sugar mustard glaze like all the family loves. I baked up a sweet potatoe and defiled it with butter brown sugar and marshmellows. we did not have a turkey as we were at my daughters and this is what she had to prepare. I make a green bean cassarole and stuffing and a fruit salad, I peeled 5 lbs of potatoes and made mashed taters...and when it was all place in the buffet line for all to go thru, I took a teaspoon of everything and managed to finish most of it before feeling the satisfaction of eating Easter Dinner with my family as I always had in the past. I did skip the pies and the amazing desert buffet my sister in law had prepared but everyone else was able to indulge. Easter was a success!
 
I did not lose any weight over the holiday, however I did not gain any either.

Going back to work was a lot harder than I thought. My job requires that I travel to local site 2-3 times a week and sometimes I would forget my lunch so I had to eat out. But I think I have finally adjusted.
 
I hate to admit it but I had buyer's remorse up until week 6. Three things happened...(1) I was able to get into a size 14, (2) I was able to drink 50 oz of water and didn't have dry mouth any more and (3) my husband told me that he was going to go through the surgery as well. Eating is better too.
 
So today I had my 8 week follow up with the nurse and dietition. I am not longer under any restriction. I can have strawberries, nuts, and drink through a straw. YAY!!!!!! Also, I have lost 43 lbs and I fit into a size 12 comfortably but can squeeze into a size 10. My back no longer hurts. My knees no longer crack. I can run up and down the stairs no problem. I feel great! It was totally worth it. Oh...and my sex life is amazing!!!!! :wub:

Hello VST...
 
So last night I was really getting down on myself because I knew it was time to challenge "me" with better eating. I've been going through a lot of emotional dramas lately and I've found that my eating habits have been downright stinking it up. Well, I'm tell you this! There's no way that can become a habit because quite literally I've gone through far too much to slip back into the old me. No way no how!!
 
So last night I made a pact with myself... I have a 60 challenge coming up. It's called the Insanity! Challenge. I don't know if any of you know what this is, but here's a link if you'd like to check it out. Anyway, upon completion you send in your before and after photos to Beachbody and they will send you a prize T-Shirt with the Insanity! Logo on the front, and "I earned it" written across the back. Heck yeah!! Are you kidding me? I'm so going to wear this every chance I get this summer. I know I'm physically capable of doing it. It may be tough but I will DEFINITELY do it!!
 
My motto has always been "Every day is a new chance to start over". I believe this with all my heart, and quite honestly is the sole reason I got to where I am today. My attitude always kept positive that I will get to my goal and I got here. Whatever that means... but now I'm wanting to work on my fitness level. I'm taking it to the next step now, and I'm excited about it. HOWEVER... I cannot do that if I keep eating junk! Last night I decided I needed to do the flush to get those sugar demons out of my body.
 
I know some of you have heard of my Basics Bootcamp? Well, I've tried to start it a few times, but haven't really been able to grasp on. So, I needed to do something a little deeper, hardcore and unforgiving. That's right... the dreaded liquid diet. AUUGGHHHH!!! I've been avoiding this like the black death but you know what? If I don't do this I'll likely just waste more time getting back on track.
 
So...
 
Here I am nearly 21 hours into this. I'm doing 2 full days of liquids, which ultimately translates into a total of 62 hours without food. I'm drinking 64 Oz. per day of water, 4 - 8 Oz servings of G2, Unjury Chicken Soup 3x (which translates to my Breakfast, Lunch and Dinner) and for my 3 Snacks I'm doing an Atkins Advantage RTD. *Whew*!!! Once the two days are up, I plan to do 3 days of super clean eating which every meal will consist of lean protein and green veggies. After that I'll go back to my mindless sleever rules and stick to good healthy meals.
 
Right around lunch time today I already began to miss food!! I felt a little panicky and I heard that voice in my head saying "Oh it's okay... you've done good today - think about what you're going to have for dinner..." So I decided to leave a status on Facebook to get it out of my mind! I must do this!! I need to detoxify my body and brain from sugar and I'd really love to drop some water retention if I can. If not, oh well - but I have to get over this sugar.
 
Wow... I feel better already getting all my thoughts out. If you're still with me (because I know I can go on forever if I really wanted to) thank you for listening and reading.

I am home at last. I crawled into bed at approximately 1 a.m. I don't feel any pain or discomfort and I worked hard to get in liquids the whole day flying. I should have kept the compression socks they put on me for surgery and worn them as it was definitly uncomfortable sitting for so long. I got an aisle seat and got up at least once during each flight but I kept thinking of those darn blood clots!
 
I'm alive so I think I am good to go
 
My liquids yesterday included an 8 oz bottle of water, a 15 oz bottle of apple juice, a 16 oz bottle of apple juice, 2 oz of water on one plane and about 4 oz on the other plane. I wasn't hungry at all.
 
I had to go back to work today but I kept to a desk most of time and got up here and there. Had normal energy levels. Didn't feel like I was dragging (in fact if it weren't for the bandages still on my stomach and my inability to consume large sips of liquids I wouldn't even feel like I had a procedure). I keep waiting for an energy crash of some kind with the level of calories I am consuming but apparently my stored fat is keeping everything in check for now.
 
I am making my husband do my "heavy lifting" which included getting my luggage out of the car and bringing the full dirty laundry basket into the laundry room.
 
So far today I have had 8 oz of water, 16 oz of light cranberry juice, 8 oz beef broth, and 2 popsicles. I'm going for some light apple juice next and more beef broth for dinner.

Hi All,
Thanks everyone for all your lovely comments they are really appreciated. Including the one for my husband too. Bless him, he loved that he got a mention.
 
Last night I slept reasonably well and woke up this morning with my head a lot clearer too. I guess that I am getting rid of all the anaesthesia out of my body. I am walking regularly and managing to take in plenty of fluid. I managed a final count of 50 ounces of fluid yesterday so felt pretty proud of myself.
 
I am thinking of asking for belching and burping to be made an olympic sport, if it was I guarantee that I would win a gold medal for Britain this year! Does that go on forever? Or does it slowly subside? I am hoping it does subside as this is rather embarrassing to say the least. On the other hand, if it is a lifelong thing I guess I will just have to learn to live with it. Given the burps or being morbidly obese I will happily take the burps thank you very much.
 
I am feeling very positive at the moment, but I am very aware that I could 'crash' down and feel pretty low. I hope it doesn't happen, but have read so many peoples blogs where they have crashed and felt very low and depressed that I wouldn't be too surprised if it happened to me too. Still, at the moment I am on a high and loving life.
 
My husband is still being so warm and supportive, that if I wasn't already married to him I would snap him up in an instant. I realise just how lucky I am to have him totally on my side and with me every step of the way on this journey. So nothing new to report except that I am a day further on and hopefully today will manage my magical 64 ounces of fluids. Good luck to everyone out there about to take this life changing step and I hope you have my luck and have a relatively easy journey.

My surgery took place on March 16, 2012 in Celebration Florida and was done by Dr. Keith Kim, a very good surgeon in this field. I have done research for about 4 years on the subject and talked with countless people about the surgery and those who have had the procedure done. The most surprising thing that I learned was that most people view WLS as a negative cheating way to lose weight, but the majority with that viewpoint were often uninformed or just ignorant to the whole weight loss process. As I sit here 3 days post-op and can feel my body returning to the size it was meant to be I can say that much of my concern is not centered on getting in shape. As a former Army recon scout I was really ashamed of how I let myself become out of shape and lacked the self discipline to eat right and stay in shape but I vowed to not be over 50 and fat……. And so begins my first steps.

I feel I've neglected the blog activity since I returned to work. So I am at work, taking a break to blog. I can't believe a month and 5 days has gone by. It took just about as long to get to twoterville, and I was starting to panic when it did not happen as fast as I hoped. Patience is a virtue that I believe was extracted during my VSG. So, I thought I would share my key learnings.
 
1) Listen to my body. How my mind works and my body works are two different things. My mind (stress triggers) say eat, when my body is not hungry at all. If I listen to how I feel as I eat, I learned that I can avoid feeling any pain or discomfort from eating.
 
2) Slow & steady is a challenge, but it works. I have really struggled to pace myself and take my time eating. When I do, it is a good experience, when I don't I suffer the consequences.
 
3) Mood swings and emotional uncertainty is OK. I've woke up crying for no reason. I get overwhelmed easily. I find myself crankier that I used to be some days and happier then I ever was other days. Taking my daily vitamins has helped with the erratic moods.
 
4) Surrounding myself with support (via this forum) and friends has been instrumental. I find that I can share my success and my failures openly and I'm not judged.
 
5) Damn these incisions! They are taking for ever to heal! I have a few straglers that just won't heal. I learned that my skin is fragile and that there is alot of stuff that touches your stomach every day, the desk, the table, the kids, it's hard to keep it protected.
 
6) Exercising is not that easy. In fact, I've slacked. I admit it. I was good the first 2 weeks and since then I've not walked for two weeks - just got the key to the gym near my house and every time my husband asks, "did you walk today" I feel like releasing fire ants on his feet and stabbing them with ice picks. (I'd never do that, but the mere fact that he asks, pisses me off.) I find myself struggling the most with this. I even bought an X box Kinect and Zumba Fitness to play on it. Do I use it. NO. I have done one thing. I park as far from my office chair as possible - I go in the opposite side of the building cross the building take the stairs and then cross the length of the building again to get to my desk. That is the only pro-active exercise thing I've done. Tomorrow is a new day.
 
7) Weighing my self daily is NOT Necessary, manaing how I feel daily, IS.
 
Eventually, I will get it right - I'm still learning and becoming the me I see through VSG.

My Story
 
I am 42 years old, 5’5” and weigh 243 lbs. I wear size 20/22 pants and 2X tops.
 
I never really thought about my weight one way or another until I wanted to join the military (18 years old). When I went to check out all the branches I actually choose the Navy because I had to lose the least amount of weight – 30 lbs (I was 180 at the time). I put myself on a crazy crash diet and exercise program to lose the weight as fast as possible. I could only get to 25 lbs down and the day before I had to weigh in I took a bunch of laxatives (NEVER AGAIN!). I was over my weigh in by 2 lbs but they gave me a waiver and I joined the Navy for 5 years. The good thing about the military is that they give you a PT test and weigh in every six months so I kept myself within my weight range (not easily but I did it for five years). The moment I left the military and restrictions of weighing in and exercising came off I started a progression of gaining weight. Getting married, moving, new job, college, graduate school, and an uncertain future helped add more weight on.
 
I work very hard to not let my weight interfere with my life. We live in a coastal region so summer clothes and swimsuits are a staple. My husband (not overweight) loves the water and I love my husband so I am good about not letting my weight become an issue in our marriage (which means even if I feel uncomfortable in my 22 size bathing suit I fake my enthusiasm for spending the day on the water).
 
I never thought about WLS until my sister had lapband surgery a few years in Mexico. She actually had a bad situation with her band slipping and had to go into emergency surgery and now she is battling the insurance company to cover the emergency surgery. Up until then I hadn’t know about medical tourism or about the many WLS options.
 
This past fall I started to research different WLS surgeries. I have to lose 100 lbs and that is beyond overwhelming to me. The most I lost was 30 lbs on WW but gained that back and more.
 
I liked the sleeve option better then gastic bypass. My insurance does not cover it so I knew I was going to be self pay. My husband isn’t very chatty and I he said if that is something I wanted to do then fine but he is fine either way (I married an easy going guy). He won’t be going with me….no sense in both of us going if he’ll be bored. I am not telling anyone about the surgery. I don’t want to be talked out of it (it is enough to keep myself from talking myself out of it!).
 
I think I am a good candidate for surgery. My health is very good (minus the 100 excess pounds). My weight related ailments include – lack of energy, knees that bother me, and snoring. Our only son is married and serving in the military (so no small children). I am on temporary assignment outside of the classroom this year so I don’t have the crazy and stressful teacher schedule (which will make recovery easier for me).
 
I am mentally preparing for a rough few months after surgery (I am not a complainer and can tough out a lot). I am worried about the normal things – complications, insurance not covering complications, dying, long term ramifications, dealing with my eat out friends. However I am looking forward to buying clothes in normal sizes, fitting into airplane seats, crossing my legs, having more energy, enjoying being outdoors.
 
My surgery is on March 28th.

Back tracking a bit—I was approved on February 10, 2012 which made it a one week wait to hear back from my insurance company. I have scheduled my surgery date for March 15, 2012! Equally excited and nervous. Now, I am preparing myself and my home for post-surgery.

I had my surgery on Monday, February 27, 2012. Admittedly, I've had a couple of fleeting moments of regret. But again, they were fleeting. This is not a decision I entered into lightly. Not to mention the lengthy process required to even get approved for the surgery. The initial pain and discomfort following the surgery had me wondering if I've made the right decision. I know that as I heal and get past this rough part, I will welcome the weight loss and all the other changes I look forward to, like not needing a seatbelt extender when flying and being able to wear the "gimme" t-shirts people handout and never have the plus sizes.
 
Today is the first day that I have felt like I can move around without my innards hurting. The gas pains are horrible, though. I knew I had a lactose intolerance but it was mild. I was able to drink protein shakes before my surgery and drank them quite a bit throughout the liver shrink diet. But post-op, I tried the same protein shakes and the gas is unbearable. So I had to switch to soy milk. The soy milk still gives me a little gas but nothing like the protein shakes.
 
I am starving but can only do liquids. I'm a little worried about not being able to consume enough protein during this phase since I can't drink the protein shakes. I can't wait until I move to the soft foods stage.
 
In addition to it all, very few people even know I've had the surgery so there aren't many people with whom I can discuss the aftermath and how I'm feeling. I'm glad to have found this forum and although I've never blogged before, I'm going to give it a try -- not only to document this journey for myself, but also because it might give others some insight into what this journey is like. I'm usually a very private person, so this is really new to me. However, I've decided that I'm going to be open and honest and just put it out there. From reading some of the other blogs and posts here, I feel like I am among the right community to do so. Thank you all!
 
Sleeved 2-27-12

I've always said, I will not listen to anyone giving me advice who hasn't been through the same journey. I hope that my story will add some credibility to my posts and inspire someone considered WLS.
 
I'm on a quest to find the woman I lost years ago. She's somewhere in this body, I know that, I just haven't seen here in almost a decade. I'm almost 300 pounds on a 5 foot 7 frame. My family medical history is like Wal-Mart, you name it someone has it. I want to break the cycle of high blood pressure, diabetes, heart disease, cancer, etc. . I can't get back the years I've already lost, but I can make the years I have left that much better.
 
I have a carb addiction, disillusion about the amount of food I should be eating, and an emotional eating habit. I was taught as a child to clean my plate, I remember at 8 years old looking forward to going to my grandma's because she always had pound cake made, and dinner consisted of meat, a few veggies, heaping mounds of carbs (rice/potatos) and rolls. 20 Years I've been addicted to carbs. My mom and I could go to a restaurant and finish an entire basket of rolls before our food came and still eat everything on our plate, plus another basket of rolls. Needless to say, I've never had a good example when it came to eating.
 
Fast forward through middle school, when at 5"7 and 130 lbs I was the tallest girl in my entire school. Talk about a complex. At 9 I thought I was fat. Junior high, I'm still tall and muscular but everyone else is catching up. Rumors start that I'm taking steroids. Hence another complex about being "thick" and muscular.
 
High School, the Revolution Years. I rebelled against EVERYTHING! Stress at home= emotional eating. I remember coming home from school and eating half a loaf of bread, toasted with butter and jelly because it made me feel better. Nutrition? What's that? It wasn't taught at our school. Lunch for 4 years, FOUR YEARS, consisted of chili cheese fries with extra cheese and sweet and sour dipping sauce, juice or soda, and some other high carb or fried food. FOUR. YEARS. I do remember a salad but it was far and few in-between. I think back on this and I cringe. What the heck are we doing to our kids??? My saving grace was band. The amount of practice we did counteracted some of the weight gain. I stayed around 180-200 lbs.
 
College, the fittest years of my life. I decided to major in Nutrition, the one thing I had no knowledge of. Freedom to come and go as I pleased means more time in the gym. HBCU band practice consisted of intense PT at 5 am and intense practice from 3-7. I was at my fittest ever. I wouldn't believe it myself if I didn't have pics to prove it.
 
Grad school I continued my good gym habits, but even a nutrition degree can't combat the psychological condition of emotional eating. I started gaining weight. Then I got pregnant. My weight shot up to 230 with the first pregnancy and miscarriage and I gained 20 more from the stress. Pregnant again at 260 with the help of pills. I went up to 285. Lost 20 and have been stuck at 270 for 3 years.
 
This brings us to today. 10 days from VSG surgery and positive about where my life is heading. I'm not one for sharing a lot of personal information, but I will try to keep this "blog" updated as I progress through. I need to learn how to let people in and break down this brick wall that I've built.

Well, everything is going great! I've lost 35 lbs so far! Very very happy about that.
 
I had my 4wk follow-up visit last Tuesday also. My doc was very pleased with my status/progress and he has encouraged me to keep a food diary. I know I'm suppose to do that, but it is just not my thing. I just do not like to keep a food diary. I went through that numerous diets before on WW and all other diets. To me, my new sleeved stomach, isn't a diet, it is a new way of life, living and eating. I know exactly what I'm eating these days - protein first and there is not much room for anything else.
 
I did experience the dreaded 'sliming' last Friday. I thought it was a myth, but it is not. I thought I could eat a little something - a few bites of firm tofu, cooked yellow beets and some quinoa salad. I chewed and chewed and chewed it up so it was kind like a puree (since last week and this week I'm on the 2wk pureed phase), but...immediately afterwards, I was so sick and knew it wasn't going to stay down. It didn't and along came the sliming. Ok, can't talk about it much as it starts to turn my stomach again. Needless to say, it was a lesson. Gotta take this eating thing super slow. So, since then, I've been back on liquids, yogurt, silken tofu, soups. I'm making a pureed curried sweet potato soup this evening and will make it kinda thick to move more into the purees. I guess as time goes on, I will at some point eat solid food, but it seems like that is down the road. I would so love a raw green salad with all kinds of veg in it...someday. It still continues to floor me knowing the amount of food or nutrition I put in my body compared to the amount pre-sleeve.
 
I'm now in my..what I considered pre-sleeve, my skinny jeans, which will soon be my fat jeans! It's nice to get rid of my 2X and 3X ugly clothing. Well, a lot of it was very nice, but I have shrunk out of them. Hee hee!!!
 
One Love.

Wow what a difference a day makes. I suddenly feel soooooo much better. My belly still gurgles but I learned that this is total normal. Drinking water is easier. I have already had 8oz of water. Still burping a lot after I drink. I just can’t seem to sip without swallowing air. Most of my pain is internal. Of course, it hurts really bad when I sneeze or cough.
 
Blood pressure is a lot better than when I was in the hospital. Two days ago is was 175/97. Today its 134/86. Still a little high but less concerning.
 
Also walking a little faster. Yesterday I walk 3 x for 10 min at 1.0 miles per hour. Today I walked 1 x for 10 min at 1.5 miles per hour. My goal today is to walk 5 times. :Banane06:

It is the end of Day 3 since my surgery. Still pretty sore but I am been really good about taking the pain med. I was having problems drinking. When I drink, my I get a lot of gurgling in the belly. The only thing that has worked was sugar free popsicles but that taste really syrupy. Anyone else have this problem? And if so, how long does it last. I was able to get 10 oz. of water down today and 20 grams of protein. Tomorrow’s goal is 20 oz. water and 40 grams of protein.

January 25th was my surgery... i wanted to wait till my first post op appointment with my doctor to find out my weight loss. So It's been 2 weeks and I'm happy to say I lost 34 pounds!!!! YES!!! I started at 341 lbs and now I'm 307 lbs. Right now I'm following the diet to the T. I regret not preparing myself before surgery because right now it's all mental for me. The diet itself isn't hard but I wish there were more things I could taste (don't we all). I'm on stage 3. Today I finally tried eggs it went okay. Day by day I'll get use to it. For quite some time I've been smoking, drinking, and EATING my life to death... to be honest I had drinks 2 weeks before my surgery. I quit smoking for 2 weeks to take my labs and smoked 2 days before. I didn't realize how foolish and selfish I was until I laid there awaiting surgery. My life flashed before me and I couldn't believe all that I've missed. It's hasn't been long but I know I'm not going back. Well, that's my start.

Almost 2 months out from surgery. I am on a steady losing streak. I am THRILLED! I am currently down a little more than 30 pounds! I look better but more importantly I FEEL better!!
 
It has been a little harder than I expected it to be, but I think I am finally figuring out my new stomache. I eat VERY LITTLE, but never feel hungry. That part if pretty cool. I have been pretty good about taking my vitamins, but I know I am not being great about getting in the protein I should be getting. I am working on that.
 
I went back to work a couple weeks ago... that was rough. My fatigue is getting better and my stamina is finally coming back, but whoa that was a rough road!! I slept a lot that first month.
 
None of my friends know about my surgery. Only my family... CLOSE family. Nobody seems suspicious yet... I am worried someday that will change. My weight has always been a roller coaster ride for me, so I am sure they are all just thinking it is another one of those "fad diets" I am currently trying. This time there will be no gaining it back... I am thrilled.
 
Can't wait to post the "I MADE IT TO MY GOAL WEIGHT" blog someday in my future!!

Today the day.. I'v lost 50 lbs!! What a great day to be me!!

Well, its time. I am now leaving my house to go the hospital. I am excited and extremely nervious but I glad the day has finally arrived.

I had my check-up in Vegas this morning and most of it was really good. According to their scale I weight 290 but that is good 47 lbs for their records. I still like my scale better 285 this morning = 52 lbs lost.
 
Was given my card to show the buffet cashiers so I don't get charged a ton. Was cleared to do what ever I want and eat what ever I want (except soda). I don't have to go back for 3 months YEAH!!!!
 
Picked up a few snack bars and some more hot coco yummy.
 
It was a good trip all in all.
 
On the down side I was told I wasn't eating enough calories he wants me at 1000 to 1100 calories a day (instead of 600-900). I will give it my best shot.
 
Happy Journey trails for all.

I just relized that my surgery is in 8 days..... Im so excited and Im ready.. I cant wait to get back to the size I was in my early 20's, ready to go shopping , ready feel better and look better.

Ok so went to go see my surgeon today and guess what???....I LOST 13 POUNDS!!! In only 6 days people...6 days!! He took my bandages off and I thought for sure I'd be grossed out but they are BEAUTIFUL [except of course for some bruising mainly from the needles they gave me in my belly to prevent blood clots, but no worries...the needles don't hurt one bit..I was scared, but they were like nothing after the first one lol promise *PIX UP OF THEM WITHOUT BANDAGES*]!!! lol Kinda hurting right now, but beautiful nonetheless lol I can start my full liquid diet tomorrow YAAAY!!! That means strained cream soups [so having tomato soup tomorrow lol],sugar free ice cream and yogurt. OH YEA!! Of course though I've been craving ice cream so I went and got a small sugar free ice cream. Felt so good, didn't eat all of it...put the rest away. But, it also I believe caused me to have my first bowel movement since Saturday!! And he said I can go upstairs as many times I want now...I can run, jump,walk miles, do whatever just not lift yet. Oh yeaaa. I still can't overdue it becuz I'm still weak if I do to much like earlier today [i finally was able to take a shower on my own, but of course going up all the steps to the bathroom plus the shower was exhausting enough for me. I had to come down and relax. It really takes a lot out of you] and I'm not use to it, but little bylittle and it's gonna be great!! Oh and I just went driving for the first time in awhile!! Super feeling lol

So, I'm feeling a lot better than I did. The gas pain is barely there. It comes and goes, but it's not a constant thing like it was. My incisions are sort of hurting, but it's not unbearable. I've stopped taking my pain meds just because number one I don't really have THAT much pain anyways and number two becuz it was causing me to hallucinate at night. Just trying to get all that medication out of my body since I'm not use to being on any kind of pills or medicine. I came home Sunday and Monday was probably the worse for me so far just becuz I'm use to having my privacy and being alone and there I was in front of EVERYBODY in my house and them constantly on me saying "you should be drinking more water"..."you should be walking"..."you should be doing this and taking that." I was going crazy!! I hated the fact that I couldn't move around like I wanted and go out anywhere. I was really getting depressed and started saying how much I regretted getting the surgery done. But, people were telling me that's normal. My nurse even told me before I left that I would have those days where I'm going to regret it and wish I could take it back and feel miserable, but to keep pushing forward and remember it will get better. Them nurses were such lifesavers, I tell ya!! But, the next day I got out of that miserable mood and just tried to stay positive and in a better mood. I know I have a lot of help and people that care behind me. I've been sleeping in a recliner since I've gotten home becuz it hurts to much to sleep in a bed...I just can't sleep right. But, as of last night I really don't want to sleep in the recliner at all. It's starting to get uncomfortable and all I want to do is sleep on my side. I tried this morning to lay in a bed and go to my side with a pillow in front, between my legs, and behind me, but I was still hurting and uncomfortable =( I don't know what I'm going to do tonight. It was such a nice day out for the last 2 days, yesterday I walked out to the deck and sat outside to get some fresh air. And then my mom took me for a drive around town just to keep me sane lol It felt soooooo good. I can't even tell you. Just to have some fresh air flowing through ya and just to get out and a reminder that there is a life behind the four walls I've been stuck in lol Today it seems like I've been struggling with wanting FOOD...I'm sick of the broth, I'm sick of the apple juice, and popsicles. I'm afraid I forgot how to chew!! lol All I keep thinking is I want a slice of pizza, a hamburger, some chocolate. UGH!! But, I think all I really want is just some solid food!! A small salad or even small veggies or fruits. But, I know it's going to be awhile before I can eat anything like that. One secret...maybe it's not a secret, but it's definitely been helping me out A LOT lately...is people been telling me live in the moment. Don't worry about the future. Recognize your success now. Well of course that's great and all. I do live by that even before the surgery, but what helps me is thinking about the future. Thinking about when summer gets here. How I'm going to feel. Thinking about how I'll be able to fit on the rides at the amusement parks again. I'll be able to wear jean shorts and a tank top and not be ashamed. I'll be able to do things without troubles or getting tired. I'll be able to fit in places without having to worry whether I'll be able to fit in them or not. And then what really gets me happy =) is I start to look online at stores that I couldn't shop in before...at all the cute clothes and I kinda start shopping in a way. Put things on my wish list. It really gets me hyped up and more upbeat about the present time. If you don't have something to get ya going and your mood positive you will end up in a slump. Attitude is definitely EVERYTHING!! Tomorrow I go back to see my surgeon for the first time since I seen him in the hospital. I'm so excited just to get out! lol But, I'm also excited to see how much weight I have lost already. I know it's only been 5 days, but everybody is telling me that I look like I lost a good 15 pounds and I can definitely see it in my neck and shoulder area! That's another thing that keeps me going. When people or yourself can start seeing results...ahhh it's a great feeling!!! Let me tell you =) I'm sure he'll be taking off my bandages that are on the incisions and that part I'm not looking forward to just becuz I have a very week stomach. The other night I was in the bathroom getting ready to take a shower. I was standing in front of the mirror and looking at the bruising and where it was all taped up. I almost passed out. I had to hurry up and lye on the bed becuz I almost blacked out. Let me just say it happened to me during the spring last year. I had fallen and skinned my knee awful. I thought I had broken it when I went to stand and I ended up blanking out right then and there. I ended up needing to go to the hospital. So hopefully I can just turn my head and get it over with tomorrow. This whole experience has definitely made me stronger and I never realized how strong I was until I went through something like this. It's definitely life changing so you better be ready to go! I definitely am =)

alright so here is the skinny..lol no pun intended.. my stats as of today
5'7''
hw: 265lbs
gfs:250
dos:238.1
cw:202.9
gw:150
 
As of today I am 53 lbs from goal. I had my first post op meeting with my surgeon a few days ago everything went well.. doc said im on track and infact that i have lost something equivalent to those on bypass surgery, which i took as a good thing. She said that im healing nicely and that i can return to full workouts...YAY!!!!! THAT MADE ME HAPPY. Im gonna really start working my abs now cuz i want to have a 6 pack.. or at least something that resembles a 6 pack.
 
So i have to admit.. lately i have been slackin on hitting the gym, but its cuz ive been really tired lately, i think a lot of it is due to the fact that i am NOT getting in my required amount of food and i keep forgetting to take my vitamins.. I know i know.. not good.. so im trying to get back on the horse and remember to take my vitamins and eat right.
 
I am gonna keep this blog short as i decided to slice my hand open and its kind of hard to type.. but ive added progress photos for you to see!
 
ITS A NEW YEAR!!! TIME FOR A NEW ME!

This blog is being created to keep me stay focused on my goal and have accountability as well as hopefully be a resource for others who are considering starting their own journey. My journey started a few years ago when I started researching Weight Loss Surgery (WLS). I went to my very 1st seminar and found it quite informative. Until my husband went to the seminar he was not very thrilled about what I was considering and after that I have really have had his support. At that time most insurance companies were still not covering the Sleeve (VSG) and I myself had never heard of it but found myself quite intrigued with the information. At that time I was considering the lap band procedure. After the meeting I was ready to make my change but got really discouraged when the group that the Dr uses to handle all the insurance and scheduling, etc seemed to be more about themselves and the money they could make than what was good for the patient. Since I got the huge vibe that they were all about the money I decided to call my insurance company to see if there were other options and explained how this group wanted to charge for everything and it was all out of pocket and they sd it wasnt covered by insurance. My insurance encouraged me to find another doctor. I decided to do more research and decided surely I can do this on my own, yea right!
So here I am 3 years later. I made my decision to go ahead and have WLS in October 2011 when my lab test came back to the dr showing that I was no longer a borderline diabetic that I now have type II diabetes and knowing my family history I knew this wasn't something to play around with. My doctor asked if I had ever considered WLS as if it was his idea, lol, and I told him I had and he wrote up a referral for me and it was ready for pick up in just a couple of days.
So here's my calendar of events so far:
 
October 25 - had annual physical and blood test done
Nov 1- Drs appt - got results from test and Dr sd wd give referrel for WLS
Nov 10- Bariatric Seminar
Nov 11- Drs appt regarding blood sugar levels
Dec 12- Drs appt
Jan 12- Drs Appt ( gotta make sure I see doctor for 6 consecutive visits to keep insurance from denying surgery)
Jan 12- 1st visit with surgeon
Jan 17- Psych eval- was told eval wd be sent over by next day to surgeon with approval
Jan 25- Upper GI and lab work done
Feb 3- 5 mth visit with Primary doctor
 
Once my 1st visit with the surgeon was done, I have felt as if I had been on a rollercoaster of dr's appts but I totally don't mind at all!
My Dr appt with my surgeon went very well. One of the requirements they have is you must bring a support person with you to your 1st appt. They don't care whom you choose as long as the person is 18 or over. My surgeon told me the sleeve was a excellent choice and provided my husband and I with very informative information of what to expect in the coming weeks as well as when I have the surgery and my hospital stay. He also encouraged for me to go ahead and get plugged into their support group that they have which I find is a very good idea. I could use all the support I can get. One of the things that made me feel so much better about this is the whole process is totally different then the process I started going on 3 years ago. This is being handled as any medical need where everything can be filtered thru my insurance instead of made to feel as if this is elective surgery therefore if you want a support group you have to pay for it out of pocket, if you want insurance filed you have to pay for it out of pocket. I am so glad my Dr referred me to such a fantastic group. I have done my research and the Dr's are excellent and have had no deaths from the result of their surgery. In fact I didn't find not one negative thing about the entire group.
One thing I do want to say is that the surgeons office gave me a list of Psychologist that I could use if I chose too to schedule my Psych eval. I actually called and spoke to one of the staff at one of the offices and I could not believe the fees, besides the 20% copay they sd they charged $185 to actually send the eval to the surgeons office and insurance did not cover that she did a quick calculation and sd it looked as if I wd be paying somewhere around $400 for my 1st appt with filing fees included. I decided before scheduling I should call my insurance company (Cigna open access) and I'm so glad I did. I called my insurance and they sd my employer actually has a EPT plan with the insurance and they gave me a list of names and numbers along with getting a EPT # for me and told me I could have up to 3 visits free and there wd be no cost for the evaluation that insurance wd take care of any cost. They also informed me if I needed any additonal visits after my surgery or even before that the visits are only $10 a visit. WOW! If I had not called my insurance I wd have paid out quite a bit of unnecessary money and I don't know about everyone else but I work hard for my money and have no desire to throw it away unnecessarily.
I decided to go ahead and start working on trying to lose weight before my surgery and start walking to work on my endurance so once I have the surgery it won't be as difficult. I already know that alot of people are going to ask why have the surgery if you can lose weight on your own, the problem is i have never in 20 years been able to get below 201 lbs and the last few years with the pre diabetic sugar highs and now full blown diabetes it is even harder to lose weight. WLS is not a quick fix but it is a tool to help people get the help they need.
I'm looking forward to my journey towards good health and am very open to words of wisdom and encouragement.
 
Tammy