Debbie G.

I cannot believe it has been 10 days since surgery!!!!!! I am doing great! I weighed myself this morning and I am 17 pounds down!!!!!!!!! HOLY CRAP! The only thing that is so funny to me is that I cannot figure out where I am losing weight cause my pants still fit good... I think it might be my face and my fingers. But it has to be somewhere else too because i could not have lost 17 pounds in just those areas! Anyways... I have been out running and around and doing errands before christmas festivities begin tomorrow so that has been good but also exhausting.
 
The one thing I have really noticed about changes in myself since surgery is my singing voice. I travel the world singing gospel music and have 2 CD's out and I cant sing good right now. I am so nervous that it wont come back and i need it to because I am touring the southern United States this coming may. So yeah... imma need these cracks and limited air supply to step up their game and LEAVE!
 
I hope everyone is doing well!!!!
 
STATS
surgery day: December 13th, 2011
heaviest weight: 261 lbs.
current weight: 244 lbs.
days since surgery: 10 days

I just had surgery December 14th on Wednesday.
 
The most painful part was the gas. It was like having really, really bad heartburn.
 
I didn't eat anything for the first two days and now I can finally pass liquids.
 
I am on a liquids only diet and I can drink and eat clear liquids.
 
It hurts to swallow and I can't tell when I'm full or maybe I just don't know when I'm full. That still confuses me. I just know that I feel pain but I don't know if that is because of what I ate because it's right after surgery or because that is when I'm full. I can't tell and that to me is very confusing.
 
I hope to figure it out soon...

So, I have to admit... this pre-op diet has been quite difficult.... I think I slightly underestimated the hold that my FRENEMY food had on my life.. In fact, I should call it my food master!!! I've always been the type to not want anything, it if I couldn't have what I wanted... so, day 1 was SOOOO hard!! I wanted eggs, I wanted rice, I wanted cheez-its!! I had to tell myself, NO, NO, NO!!!!! It worked until 8ish and I was desperate to chew... I got over it!!!
 
I'm learning that there will be lots of times when I will just have to GET OVER IT!!! These few days have taught me some very valuable lessons:

I can't expect to just WAKE up and be a healthy person mind, body and soul.. All of it takes working through some difficult things and training myself to gravitate towards a new normal.
Some of my journey must be private and/or only shared with a very select group of people. I have no room for constant negativity... the "old" me is constantly looking for an ally.. so, I refuse to give "her" one..
I must be diligent about ensuring that my head and heart are aligned when embarking on this life altering event... (I have, but it's still not a cake walk!)