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quazarfrog

LAP-BAND Patients

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Blog Entries posted by quazarfrog

  1. Well - I did it... I'm honestly not sure how I feel about it all just yet but I'm sure I'll be happy I did it... I still feel guilty and right now.. Nov 8 - I'm right back into the swing of raising 3 small kids and 3 dogs..... and today I feel like crap - there is no way to sugar coat it. Yesterday was a great day - actually Nov 5 and 6 were great days, I even went shopping on both days and just enjoyed myself. Today however I felt rushed to be"normal" and so I did too much laundry, swept and bleached the entire main floor of the house and now - I'm paying for it.
     
    I went with my sister in law to get the surgery done and we both had exact opposite recoveries... and now that we are home - her mom is here so she sleeps all day to continue recovering while I chase 3 kids.... I'm feeling very jealous and I'm embarrassed to even say that. I'm also dealing with my time of the month ( was at the last day and then surgery totally screwed with it and it's like I have to deal with it from the beginning... as if I never had it)
     
    I went into surgery at 213 - next day I was 217 (lol can we say fluids????) today Nov 8 I'm weighing in at 210..
     
    so I'm hoping that the next few days of recovery go well.. I'm hoping for more energy and being able to eat something.
     
    It's been text book recovery - for someone without kids lol
  2. I find myself sitting around and wondering how my life will change. Will I be more mobile to play with the kids - goodness I hope so. The wayI usually attack change is expect the best but try really hard to prepare for the opposite. IN this situation I find myself expecting the best but not feeling really sure that it will work for me... I am delving into my inner self and I find that I don't think I deserve to be thin... seriously?!?!?!? how the heck did I come to that?I have no clue but It hit me yesterday that I don't feel worthy of the operation. I feel that the money could be spent on other "worthwhile" things... Holy smokes, when did my health become not worthwhile???? I used to be a gym rat and feel like I should take this weight off on my own. Does anyone else feel that for whatever reason that they are not worthy? How do I get around this thinking?
     
    I know I'm a good person
    my kids are excited for it
    I want to be able to active like I was
    I exercise now
    My husband doesn't think I need it but is %100 on board with me if I want it done ( he doesn't see the extra weight I'm carrying - God love him)
     
     
    Sooooo - the next few days are going to be spent on me... me looking at myself and knowing that I deserve this surgery and am totally worth it.
     
    Thanks for listening
     
    D

  3. really real?

    · quazarfrog · 10/09/11 01:27 AM

    Ok folks, Time is nearing and I'm starting to freak out that I'm making a ig decision... but too quickly. My sister in law has decided to go with me and have the surgery done as well and I'm hoping that it won't turn into a competition between us as to whom is losing fastest.... however I am so excited that we will have each other to commiserate with through recovery.... It's weird but great at the same time.
    This has gone from "should I" to "it's next month" very quickly and while I can't wait for the results part of me is praying for it to not fail...
     
    Am I alone in thinking that?

  4. A little about me

    · quazarfrog · 10/09/11 01:09 AM

    ok first a small introduction.
    I am36 year old stay at home mom of 3 fantastic monkeys aged 7.5 years, almost 3 and a 9 month old We have 3 dogs that add into the mix as well as my in-laws living in the basement.... our world is crazy to say the least but we love it and wouldn't change anything.... Except my weight
     
    I've always been a stalky person so it never really occurred to me that as an adult I would have a weight issue.
    as I reached adulthood I became larger and larger with each passing year. When my oldest was 6 months old I took the issue seriously and devoted 5 days a week,2 hours a day to exercise and planned each meal and was very successful. I lost 100lbs this way and was so very proud of myself. This process took about 7 months and at the end of it - my husband divorced me and I was left with a baby and not much else... enter downward spiral..... I tried to find time to exercise but I also had to work and make time for my baby who was now in daycare.
     
    I then found a very loving and caring man, we got married and started our own addition to the family Two babies later I find myself very unhappy weight wise. I have not got the time each day to devote to the gym. It is a full time job keeping up with the kids as I'm sure you all know.
     
    My husband had VSG 6 months before he met me and so I've had a bit of inside to the recovery process but I was very against it as I had just gone through working so hard to lose weight the "right" way.
     
    I am now - after 5 years of being with him, understanding that the surgery helps you get to where you want to be but you still need to do your exercise in order to keep it off... I have time to maintain weight but not time to lose weight... does that make sense?
     
    At any rate I have his blessing to get the surgery done and I'm join in next month (November 2011) to have it done.
     
    Hopefully I'll have all the fears and questions calmed in my mind before I go under the knife

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