putasleeveonit

The internet has been down the entire time here, but I'm using my phone right now.

but something about the idea of getting sleeved in two days seems a little too surreal... like it's too good to be true... I feel like something will go wrong at the last moment. Like maybe my pre-op test will show something crazy and my surgery will be canceled, making my trip to Mexico a colossal waste of time. I don't know why-- I've been so blessed in my life, but a part of me always feels like things won't work out for me. Like a negative outlook or something. Not only that, but I've done my part to sabotage everything. Even though I wanted to do a pre-op diet, I completely failed in that effort. Completely and utterly. The sleeve is my last hope, but my fear right now is returning to Atlanta, fat and unsleeved.

I've experienced that before. I think the reason is that it happened so fast (within 2 weeks?). People have not had a chance to figure out what's different yet.

As I get closer to surgery, my mind keeps trying to get me back into "last supper mode." A part of me keeps saying, "just eat what you want until surgery since you weren't given any rules!" Also, I keep moving the goal post. First I said I wanted to eat low calorie/low carb for two weeks pre-op. Then I said 8 days pre-op. Now I feel the need to move it to 7 days pre-op (to get one last slice of pie ). I feel out of control and stressed out. I feel very discouraged right now because I'm wondering how I will handle the sleeve if I can't get my thinking together. I wish I could see a counselor before going, but I don't have the time now. I kind of wish I was in a local bariatric program where they provide the counseling and guidance. I've had none of that. I'm basically just going to be flying into the unknown on Friday and then sent back home. I'm 99.9% sure that I will follow the post-op guidelines (I've buckled down in the past with no problems). I think my number one objective should be to take things ONE DAY AT A TIME. Sometimes I think way too far ahead and stress myself out unnecessarily. Thoughts like, what if this doesn't work, etc etc. The moment I start having doubts about something, the first thing I want to do is EAT.

Great job! Congratulations!

Same here. Over the years I've lost and regained hundreds of pounds. I'm tired. I know one of my major issues is portion size, combined with feeling discouraged from time to time. I need something to catch me when I fall. I wish this surgery was an option for me 10 years ago.

I haven't had my surgery yet, but I was considering doing Medifast or a cheaper version of it post op in order to take the weight off quickly and then maintain from there. But I don't know if that's just my old way of thinking taking hold. I'm curious to see what the responses will be! The problem is, it is so difficult to do that there's a chance you could end up on a yo-yo cycle.

The hardest part about chronic "dieting" is fighting cravings that pop up when I'm in social situations. For example, yesterday, I wanted to pack up my baby and visit my mother's house so she could spend time with her grandson. But I didn't go. I didn't go because I was afraid I would end up falling off my low carb plan. For one, I could have been "ambushed" with a pizza or dessert that they had. Or, oftentimes my parents stress me out with their comments, etc., so that could have led me to emotional eating. Third, just being around them makes me want to eat. I associate their house with eating. Unfortunately, my parents frequently indulge in cakes and high calorie foods. Now take today. Suddenly my SO decides that he wants us to visit a church that is an hour away. Of course, I'm panicking. I went ahead and cooked my food for today, but I'm worried that the road trip will make me fall off plan. I associate long car rides with being able to stop for food. I know that this is not the way to live--either overeating with no restrictions, or eating right, but avoiding everyone and staying at home. My hope is that by the time I'm 6 months post op, I will be at my goal weight and I will never have to dodge a social situation again due to fear of breaking a diet and/or weight gain. My hope is that the sleeve will allow me to eat just a little of whatever is available or whatever I choose, and then I get full and that's it. Or, if that's not possible, just make it so that I'm so afraid to eat certain foods that I bring my own foods with me.

Since the moment the idea of surgery came into my mind, I've been overeating--I always kind of overeat, but I've really been overeating lately. It's as if a part of me wants to eat as much as possible before surgery. Or, maybe I'm eating because I'm excited and nervous about what's to come. At any rate, tomorrow, I'm going to begin my own version of a pre-op diet, even though the doctor said it was optional. My plan is to just keep things low calorie. I was going to do low carb, but since I'm so out of control, I need to have yogurt and TV dinners that I can just pop in the microwave. With TV dinners, I'll have no excuse for getting off plan. Then, I will probably transition into cooking again in the final 10 days before surgery, and at that point, I can do low carb. I'm also going to begin working out tomorrow. A friend and I plan to climb Stone Mountain. Good luck to me!

<br><br><br>LOL! Thanks! It's definitely a struggle!<br>

I'm really happy for you! I wish I had the opportunity to get this surgery when my weight problems began at 20! Good for you and good luck!

Hang in there, it will get better, based on what I've read on these boards. I haven't had my surgery yet, but the way you're feeling is normal! Good luck!

Yes, I'm going through that right now. Tomorrow begins the 2 week countdown to my arrival in Mexico for surgery, so I plan to buckle down starting tomorrow (I know it's bad to not start today). I'm not required to go on a pre-op diet, but I still want to wind down my eating and also lose weight prior to surgery, if possible.

OK, so tonight as I was settling in upstairs, I turned on the news and they were covering a plane crash at an air show. I guess it got to me, because I began to feel anxiety about the upcoming flight to San Diego for my sleeve surgery. The part that bothers me is that my sister is coming too, so it wouldn't just be me. She has a son too, so both of our boys would be without moms if anything bad happened . Before that, I was downstairs with my baby and "fiance." He has been acting really different ever since I told him I was doing the surgery whether he liked it or not. He's trying to eat healthy all of a sudden, and it seems like he's being a lot nicer because I guess he knows what I'll look like if my VSG is a success... (yes, I do feel somewhat resentful about our situation but that's another story)... But... what if it isn't a success? What if I don't lose weight? What if the loss is really really slow and everyone piles on with criticism about what a bad decision I made? Now that he and everyone knows what I'm doing, it adds to my pressure to succeed. But, unfortunately, I don't do well under pressure. At least I can't do what I used to do and eat my way back up the moment I'm discouraged. Other fears: I read a shocking statistic: The mortality rate for gastric surgery is 1 in 200!!! The article I read said the risk increased the heavier the person is due to blood clots. I'm not too heavy, but I will be on a 4.5 hour plane ride a few days after surgery. I guess I need to sit near the bathroom so I can walk around as much as possible on the flight. I guess now that my surgery date is set (October 8th), I'm starting to do my usual fight or flight/self sabotage routine. I haven't sent off my deposit check yet, but I did pay $800 for our plane tickets. I told myself I'm going to give myself the weekend to really be sure I want to go through with this. I'm 99.99% sure that I'll send off the deposit on Monday.

Mine will sound cheesy and shallow, but here goes: I can't wait to take a picture with my son who is now 8 months old. So far, I've only been in a few pictures with him, shown only from the neck up. I've taken hundreds of pictures of him alone though I can't wait to be able to update my Facebook picture with a RECENT picture of me, and not just my baby. LOL I can't wait to have my SO sweat when other guys are checking me out. I can't wait to *not* feel like getting my hair and nails done are a waste of time because I'm fat. I can't wait to not have to worry that I will run into someone who knew me back when I was slim at the grocery store. I can't wait to work out at the gym without worrying about feeling and looking fat. Gosh, I can't wait to leave the house more! I've been practically hiding out in my house for the past year!

I cannot wait to schedule my surgery! Since I've decided on this surgery, I've been eating more and more. Tomorrow I'm going to attempt to begin a pre-op plan--nothing major, just mostly low carb until my surgery date. The only thing holding me up from setting a date is I'm waiting for my PCP to tell me the results of my complete blood count. I have a history of anemia that I thought I overcame for the most part, but I haven't checked on it in a while, and I wasn't taking vitamins until I decided to get this surgery.

I haven't set a date yet, but I'd like to go to Dr. Aceves in early October, around the 9th or 10th. Anyone else? I'm worried that I might end up going by myself!

That's wonderful! Keep up the great work!

So I've been thinking about the pros and cons of this surgery: Pros: Have a chance to get and stay at my goal weight. I know it'll take work on my end as well, and in the past, I've shown that I can be dedicated and consistent, but I just need something to catch me when I fall Everything that comes with being slim--I'll enjoy shopping, new hair styles, etc Possibly lowering my chances of getting obesity related illnesses Cons: i think my biggest fear is how it might affect any future kids I have. Would I be able to get the right amount of nutrients in? From what I'm reading, everything should be fine as long as I take vitamins. I'm willing to take a prenatal vitamin every day for the remainder of my child bearing years if necessary (which won't be much longer, considering I'm about to be 32). In addition, it is recommended that you wait 18 months before having a baby. Well, I'm about to be 32. In 18 months, I'll be approaching 34! The older I get, the older my eggs will be, and the more chances of complications. Also, I was hoping my son would have a brother (or sister) close to his age. Acid reflux! On my first (and only) pregnancy, I got a taste of what acid reflux was like. It was horrible! One night I was awakened to acid going up my nose! Worst. Feeling. Ever. I think I even cried one night because I was so frustrated. The question is: Am I willing to possibly experience acid reflux for the rest of my life in exchange for being slim? Honestly, I think so. I'm at the point now where I ordered pills off the internet that have foreign labeling and I have no idea what's *really* in it. I was willing to risk my life to lose weight, so I should be willing to deal with acid reflux, right? The usual surgery risks. There's a chance of dying or something going wrong during any surgery. Of course, there's a risk when I drive to the grocery store as well. Yes, this worries me, especially since I have a child now. But I honestly feel like I can't give my son my best when I feel like hiding under a rock all the time. To be continued...

Hi Helen! Thank you so much for the info! I hope I have your results as far as acid reflux is concerned.