StephS3

Sleeved July 7, 2011 - Lost 130 Lbs so far. 20 lbs to goal!!

Sleeved July 7, 2011 - Lost 130 Lbs so far. 20 lbs to goal!!

Lissa,
I also had a history of clots before surgery. So for the sleeve they put in a IVC filter in my jugular (sp?) vein to make sure if I got another clot, it would hopefully filter it out before it got to my heart or lungs. Then several months after surgery, they removed the filter. Did you have one of those as well?
When I was dealing with the clots several years ago, again prior to surgery, I was on Lovinox and then Coumadin for several months. And when the clots didn't disapate, I opted out of the medication as well. The doctor's couldn't tell me if the clots would ever go away, even if I stayed on the thinners for life. I felt good about the decision and since my sleeve I have been retested and am officially clot free!!
I wish you luck in your journey, it really sounds like you are doing well!!!

You can walk the whole thing if you want to, but I am going to try and run about 1/2 of it.
You're right, just finishing is a huge goal of mine and I am sure I will feel great afterwards. Getting kind of nervous though...

I know how you feel 100%! I have a very people-intensive job as a teacher/musician, and I'm actually a pretty introverted personality. I was extremely self-conscious as a teen and worried I would feel awkward when people commented on my weight loss.
Okay, it is occasionally difficult to know what to say. I have a few standard replies. When someone says, "Wow! You look great!" I say, "Thanks so much! It's been an interesting process! How are you?" or "Yeah, it's getting better! How have you been?" The key to keeping it from getting awkward is the return question, I think. We just move ahead with the conversation and there's not really time for any awkwardness.
Before I was sleeved, I had a long conversation with a friend/colleague who had been sleeved with excellent results. I saw this friend at a professional conference this weekend, and she was SO excited to see my progress. I also had the opportunity to pay it forward for another colleague who wanted to ask specific questions regarding the surgery--again, nothing horribly awkward, because I try to keep it from being "all about me."
It's easier to handle the comments, even when they're positive, if you can say a quick "thank you" and get the conversation moving in other directions. You may also feel a bit different after you've lost some of the weight--I definitely do not feel as self-conscious as I did before--I used to feel I took up all the space in a room and was "in the way." Now I feel like I fit in, and that makes me a lot more likely to be comfortable in conversation or social situations than before.
Good luck! You'll develop your own strategies, and it will all be fine.

Patrice... first let me say I'm so sorry to hear about your loss, as well as your daughters. Big big ((((hugs))))!!!!!

I've always felt a kinship with you and I feel very sad to hear about all of this. I want to tell you this - and I have to emphasize it, so forgive me. YOU!!! ARE!!! NOT!!! ALONE!!! Girl, do you have any idea how much I've struggled for the past decade with my weight? My first WLS was a total, miserable, EPIC FAIL!!! I was also over 300 Lbs at one point... and with the lap band got myself all the way down to 227 Lbs. Yes, I still remember the exact weight because when I started going back up that number started being illuminated in my head like a GIANT NEON SIGN!

Well all that is over and done with, but not before gaining nearly every pound back that I'd lost with my band. I got back up to within 2 Lbs of my surgery weight. Sooo sad!!! I had to fix it though. Me and no one else. I did revise to the sleeve and I made a huge promise to myself that I WON'T do that again! I had to get myself together the best way I knew how, and that's exactly what I did.

That said, if it weren't for the sleeve I don't care how many promises I've made to myself... I'd still be fat today.

You my friend have such a WONDERFUL tool inside you. Use it!!! Look at it this way, if you didn't have your sleeve - how much weight do you think you could have gained in your time of grief? And yes, it's ok to grieve for the man who you have your precious child with. But... you said so yourself, he died from a preventable disease. Don't let that be you... your daughter has no one else now. She's counting on you to use that tool you have and get back to being healthy and being the Mom she deserves. Your future husband deserves you to be the best Wife you can be. YOU DESERVE to be the best of any woman you can be!!!

It's time to start really considering all the reason TO GET BACK ON TRACK rather than any reasons to keep going down the road you are going.

I say all of this out of nothing but wanting the best for you! Because THAT is what YOU deserve.

Things to do:

Get back to the gym. Starting now... eat the sleever way. Protein first, veggies second. 60g Protein per day and no less than 64 oz fluids per day. Never forget ALL the reasons YOU SHOULD keep doing #1 and #2. I'm here for you. I can't say I know what you're going through, but I sincerely sympathize. I care!!! But I also want you to succeed, because I KNOW YOU CAN! Question is, don't you? I hope so.

One year through the trials of hell
I started off at size 54 jeans and 6XL shirt. They were tight. I didn't wear them much because I mostly sat at the house, sans the occasional WalMart run to gather 10 2-liter Cokes for my many nights of playing World of Warcraft. Every Saturday night, I ordered an extra large Papa John's pizza with a large breadsticks and ate only that for all day Sunday watching football and playing video games. I had no girlfriend, no real friends, just the random online people I chatted with. And no computer vid cam because I never wanted anyone to see me. People on the internet are harsh, cruel and unyielding.
My doctor had prescribed 3 blood pressure and 2 cholesterol medications. He told me basically that I was going to die if I kept my weight up. I was approaching 400lbs with no end in sight. Dieting had never worked for me, since I always gained the weight back. And bulletin boards were no help, since most of the people there gained it back too. I hadn't exercised in 4 years, what was I supposed to do?
He recommended the sleeve, but it would take 6 months to get approved. I was too impatient for that, so I continued my binge. The solution it seemed was to get a girlfriend! I posted my profile online, hit up every girl on the sites and got several dates. Nobody wanted a second date however after they looked at my fatness, bad attitude and social irregularities. I became even more depressed, scored more terrible dates and spiraled into a cycle of self hatred. The movie "50 First Dates" is a comedy, however in real life it's not all that funny. I actually had one girl see me from a distance, get repulsed and leave on our first encounter. She was my 50th date, and had successfully crushed what little self esteem I had left. I went home and repeatedly hit myself in the head until I was almost unconscious. Here I am, a highly educated man abusing myself because of my miserable life.
As I laid there hurting.
I decided to change.
I started the surgery approval process, and threw away every piece of fattening food in the house. The surgeon's office had these huge chairs geared for morbidly obese people like me. It was weird to know that many other people had been on this journey, but comforting at the same time. In only three months I'd be under his knife, so it was time to get busy.
I joined a local gym who's owner was a pure b***h. She was mean to me, saying I was too fat for most of the machines. As I took my first step onto the elliptical, it started cracking. Maybe that wench was right, I WILL break her equipment! After ten minutes at level 1, I thought I would pass out. So I sat on the floor hyperventilating as she ran over and started yelling at me for being on the floor. I hated her.
Fueled by hatred, frustration, with vivid memories of all the bad dates in my head and the gym owner's voice still ringing in my ear, I suffered through. The next day I did 10 minutes, then 20 and finally a full hour at level 1.
I started on Atkins figuring I could lose a few pounds before surgery to get a healthy start. Then focusing my rage, I jacked the machine over the next few months to 3, 5, 7 and finally level 20 for a full hour. If you've never done level 20 on an elliptical, you can see your life flash before your eyes after a few minutes. Nobody else at the gym wanted any part of it as I poured sweat, breathed like a workhorse and suffered through. Not one person talked to me at the gym. Ever. Because if I wasn't near death when leaving, I didn't consider that a valid workout.
Then came this happy HerbaLife guy named Lynn. He was very friendly, inviting me over to his weight loss challenge and encouraged me every few days. This was the first person in years that didn't look away, didn't ignore me and actually was fun to talk to. I dropped 13 lbs before this weight loss challenge began, and started my pre-op diet after few weeks in. And even had surgery on one of those Mondays so I missed that meeting. The VSG board said to walk after surgery so I did, even though it hurt like hell. I walked an hour the day of surgery, the day after and every day out of the hospital. My doctor said to not exercise for a month, but I didn't really care. I wanted the weight off. In my head, all I saw was that extra large pizza barely fitting into my refrigerator, the sickly smell of those breadsticks that weren't cooked properly half the time.
So I married the treadmill and the elliptical in a ceremony of pain, sweat and anguish. I probably injured myself a couple of times during this process, but never reported it. I threw all my medications into the trash, drop kicking the empty bottles into the wall. And put my doctor's phone number on call blocking and didn't attend the follow-ups.
It's me.
And the gym.
If we die together, so be it.
After a couple months I had upped my exercise to 2 hours a day. When football was on, I'd watch a whole game from the treadmill for 3 hours. And then there was Lynn and his weight loss challenge. At the end of their 12 weeks, I had dropped 47 lbs + the 13 before for a grand total of 60lbs. I obliterated everyone. There was no second place. But in the process I had stumbled upon what fires me up - a challenge. Competing with other people, and being accountable made me lose faster, and keep it off. If you've ever attended one of these events, it's a huge Herbalife advertisement spam. But - the challenge aspect is what hooked me.
I remember during this process the day that I stopped caring what people thought about me. It was a weird day, one where I decided to wear house shoes to workout. Working on my self-esteem, people skills and removing all the negativity from my life during this process freed me a lifelong burden. One where I constantly worried when someone didn't like me, or wouldn't make eye contact as I passed by. If you ever reach this point, your life will change dramatically.
Society is filled with social pressure towards food. Every time I'm out with other people, we eat. But I drink an Atkins shake before I leave the house and normally don't eat anything. Other people try to shun you, ask why, etc. We had these little Herbalife pies in class the other day, and people were trying to guilt me into having a piece. Seriously? What a joke. I'm not hungry, and that little pie is a stumbling block towards my goal of LIVING MY LIFE THE WAY I WANT. As a populous, we've descended into food social pressure, so the other people can feel better about themselves by making you eat more.
I signed up for another challenge, and am losing 7 lbs a week. I play Tetris on my phone during the videos, because I've seen them all before (sorry Lynn). At a social event last week, I had 3 women who were just fascinated by me and were all smiles and laughs. They actually liked me, which was strange from so many years ago. I've had several comment on my positive energy and great smile that I have all the time. NOT from losing weight alone, but working on fixing myself, my attitude, outlook on life, ridding myself of worry and fear. Sure the weight helps, but you can still be miserable while thin. The sleeve is not a panacea.
I've gone from a 54 to 42 pants, soon to be at my goal weight.
I'm off all medications.
I shop at Old Navy instead of the fat store.
I meditate an hour per day.
I look in the mirror and see a sexy beast.
Instead of the fat pig blood pressure velcro sleeve, I now can fit into the regular one.
The doctor can find a vein in my arm now, instead of taking blood from my hand.
And I'm under 300lbs for the first time since the 90's
I feel fantastic all the time. Why? Because I'm living the life I want and deserve.
Join me, find what FIRES YOU UP. Channel it into your diet and exercise, whatever it takes for you to reach your own personal goals and aspirations. Steve Jobs recently died at such a young age. Life is so short. If you get hit by a bus tomorrow, what will you see as your life passes before you? A miserable existence where other people AND FOOD control your happiness, or a life filled with self-love, joy and happiness? It's only food, guys. It was designed to keep you from being hungry for a few hours, not to reign control over your destiny.
You are in control. Find your motivator. And live it.
I saw a commercial for Papa John's pizza last weekend, and threw something at the tv. That vice is no longer a part of my journey.

Both things you mention can cause this, low BP and sugar. It can also be caused by dehydration. The simplest way to determine dehydration is to look back at how much you are urinating. If properly hydrated you should be urinating several times a day, say 3 or 4, and the urine should be clear to lightly golden colored, if you are NOT urinating or the urine is dark yellow to brown then you are dehydrated. I know it's tough but just start sipping Water all day.

Low BP can be checked sitting and standing with a home pressure testing kit and the results compared, a significant drop in pressure should not occur between the two. See the doc if it's low - say WAY below 120 / 80. It may be just the change in diet doing it but it could be caused by internal bleeding. See the ER doc if it tests way low, like less than 100 / 60.

Simple blood sugar testers are available cheaply too. Levels below 70 are what to watch for. Being post op you are not eating much and the results are low glucose levels. If you can drink some apple juice it may help. OJ is good too but quite acid and may upset your already traumatized stomach.

Regardless, see the doc if symptoms persist.

I picked up an issue of Oprah’s magazine in my doctor’s office, and saw the article on the inside back page, titled “This I know for Sure”. The title captured my attention more than the content – because it rang true for me. In life there are things we know and believe to our very core – items which we are sure of in every Fiber of our being.
Here are some of my items that I know for sure . . .

VSG was the right decision for me to make positive change in my life I will never go back to the way I was pre-VSG. This is a forever commitment I have made. I will not hold perfection up as a goal for myself – I will strive for making sane, healthy choices. Nothing that I have lost, left behind or can no longer indulge in is important to me in the grand scheme of things. There is nothing in my cabinets or fridge I need to fill my life with. I will fill my life with LIFE.