MeFirstFinally

"sucking it up" won't work on chronic clinical depression and it sounds like that is what you have. I have had it since I was a child and nothing ever helped me except exercise and medication. Have you seen a physician for the depression or at least discussed it with your band doctor? Why be ashamed on the chat line? They cannot see you and probably never will...and I am applying logic to an emotional problem...always makes me wild when other people do it to me. Try to do little things to help yourself, go stand on the porch for 5 minutes, tomorrow walk to the end of the drive, throw one "bad" food item out of your pantry. Eventually little things can make a big difference, but it is hard to get started when you are stuck in an old ingrained destructive cycle. I will keep you in my thoughts.

Robbie

I am sorry you are going through such a hard time right now. My mother and sister pass out ten seconds after they hit the pillow; it makes me want to murder them in their sleep (sometimes, LOL). Tell all the devils and angels living in your head that you are the only one who has a dog in this hunt and you are getting banded for your health and future; the mind games are not helpful (which you know already). Anyone who doesn't have doubts about a life altering decision like getting banded, is taking too much happy juice or is a little psychotic. Just keep taking it one day at a time, when the doubts come up, acknowledge them and move on, maybe only allow yourself one fruit roll up or one tablespoon of pity peanut butter and then be done. I have not been banded yet (1st PCP meeting next week), but I have had doubts about every big thing I have ever tried just roll over me and try to crush me down. Sometimes the doubts won, but sometimes they didn't. I hope you can beat them back and move on to your future.

Robbie

Try brushing your teeth right after your dinner or whatever time you want to stop eating or set an alarm clock to ring at that time. A little extra reminder couldn't hurt.

Robbie