Paul11011

Where are all of the sleevers of MI?

I am currently in the process of getting a divorce. My WLS was over 4 years ago. The WLS did contribute to the divorce. It magnified the differences that were already there. Additionally I did change, physically, psychologically, emotionally, in fact in almost all ways. I do feel that in order to be a success with the WLS, one must focus on themselves, they have to commit to doing what is best for them. That is likely to come across as selfish to others, maybe it is. Its what I did and it has help me discover who I really am. Simply put, we grew in two different paths over the last 4 years. We have some similarities yet, but the majority of the last two years we were living separate lives, I would do my things and she would do hers. It got to a point where I wanted someone to doing my things with me, not out of compromise rather to be doing them because they wanted to also. These and similar issue became worse over the last four years, but they had existed previously too. Again the WLS just caused them to come more to the forefront.

Hi Carol! Great to hear from you. Congratulations on getting to goal, that is awesome! I am just holding tight waiting for this ridiculous winter to end, staying as active as I can between the gym and home weight room. I just pasted 3 years post op at the beginning of the month. Labs are great and I've maintained a total lost of 306lbs with a maintenance range of between 185 and 190 for almost 2 years now. When I started this process at nearly 500lbs I would not have believed for a second I would have ever gotten to the weight I am now. I am fully convinced this process has given me a new lease on life. Continued success on your journey!

If any of the Grand Health Partner patients are facebook users and are interested, we have a closed facebook page consisting of GHP patients with various surgeries and varing periods of time post op. Check us out at https://www.facebook.com/groups/ghpsupport/

It's not a link folks, it's a spread sheet. You can download it and look at it.

I have always struggled both in online groups and in my physical groups when a particular situation presents itself. That situation is when someone is doing something clearly against their best interests as it relates to WLS. I’m talking about the cases where people are clearly heading off track. I find myself at times frustrated and responding in an effort to get those individuals to realize what they’re doing is wrong and at times it has been in a less than tactful way. It has caused me to question why I even care or bother to respond at all. I have spent a decent about of time trying to answer this question for myself and figured I would try to explain it to y’all as well. I view myself and all of us that have WLS as members of a community. I want every person that goes through this process to be successful and improve the quality of their life. As a member of the community I feel an obligation to help those that I can on their journey. I also have a selfish motivation in trying to help others. I hate that many people in the general public view WLS patients as cheating, taking the easy way out, or that we are just continuing the pattern of laziness that got us to obesity in the first place. I hate hearing the obligatory stories, which we have all heard that goes something like this, “My friend had WLS, lost a bunch of weight and then gained it back”. I have vowed to never be that guy in the story. Here’s the selfish part of my motivation, I never want YOU to be that guy in the story either. Again from a community perspective we all fail when one of our WLS brothers or sisters does become that guy. We fail together when people go into this thinking it will be the magic bullet and don’t realize it actually does take a lot of work by the individual to succeed. We all fail when people don’t make the food changes necessary and instead think the only tool needed is the surgery. Maybe I’m wrong and should not view others success or failure as my own. Maybe I’m wrong by not being a cheerleader when people are looking for a little friendly enabling. What’s it to me after all? Sure go ahead, a double cheese burger at 2 weeks out sounds like a great idea! If it doesn't hurt, it must be ok to do, right? Hell let’s wash it down with a vanilla shake! Sorry I just can’t do it. Guess I will have to become comfortable with my role as the hard ass. I will extend one offer though. If you do want to know how to totally defeat your sleeve (RNY, DS or Band too) let me know. It’s a road map that is not difficult to follow. I figure that would at least give those inclined a quicker way to regain instead of having to spend all the time testing the waters with various, “I wonder if I can have XYZ”? If you’re reconciled to not trying and just want to jump right to failure then send me a PM, let’s get it done and out of the way. In any event, I hope this gives a better understand of why I care and view WLS support in the way that I do. I mean no one any ill will ever, but I also will not condone actions that are contrary to being a successful WLS patient. Best of luck on your journey.

Well it happened again, I was informed that "lecturing" was not support. It had been awhile since I posted this and rereading all of your replies reaffirms that sometimes people need to hear what they don't want to be told. Thanks gain Y'all.

I am so sorry to hear about the complications of your friend which you described in your original post. I'm even more sorry that you have made the initial decision to stop telling your story. I understand your feeling of guilt and how you feel you contributed to the pain your friend is experiencing. However, it's not your fault. You gave her your testimony of your experience and the rest of the events were her responsibility (more accurately as it sounds, the lack of responsibility by her surgery center). I hope you find peace and continue in your successful transformation.

I had a sleeve with Dr. Baker at GHP Jan 10, 2011. Just stick with the 2 week diet and you'll be fine. The important part is to show that you can stick to a meal plan. You will lose weight but it's secondary to being able to show that you can still stick with the program. GHP is outstanding, can't say enough great things about them. Best of luck to you.

ROFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!! I can't stop watching, even though I'm getting dizzy!

Started at 496. Day of surgery was 456. One year post op was 200. Now nearly 3 years post op I am 190 to 195. Can the sleeve work for higher weights and BMI? It did for me

Wooo Hooo, found it. Great job!

Looking great! I just sent you a PM, but figured your answer would be informative here. I can't tell how far to the sides your incisions run. Did you have the circumferential (360 degree) or just the paniculectomy (front only)? Did they do an abdominoplasty? I have been approved for the pani, but want to know what it looks like after. Anything else I will have to pay out of pocket. So I'm trying to decide how much better the results would be with the optional procedures. Thanks.

As much as I hate to reference it, because I hate it. What's your current BMI? There is nothing wrong with getting slightly under your target weight. There will most likely be a bit of a weight increase as you get further out and your body readjusts to the new weight range.

Dr. Baker is a great guy and amazing surgeon. He did my VSG 1/1/2011. Spectrum or St. Mary's hospital?

psst...update your profile info.

My honest answer. I don't know. My wife has pointed out to me on several occasions where she believes woman have been "checking me out" or have been more nice that just normal chit chat (cashiers, waitresses, etc). I really don't know and I think I know why. For my entire life I expected to not get that kind of attention. I remember being in junior high and realizing that I was the big guy and only after someone got to know me would I have any chance, I wasn't the cute guy that instantly drew attention. I really think that has contributed to why I am apparently so oblivious to any attention now. I really wish I would get some of that attention, to have that feeling for once in my life that I was someone that had a physical appeal to the ladies. It might be the case, but if it is, I don't know about it. Guess I'll have to continue relying on my sparkling personality and quick wit. Just realized I was of no help in actually answering your question.

I find myself in an odd situation. I feel as though I always need to be doing something. I am not sure if it is that I have so much more energy than I ever had before or the psychological impact of realizing just how much of my life I spent inactive and on the couch, essentially wasting my life. By doing something I don’t necessarily mean always working out or exercising, though I have found myself going out for runs, just for something to do. I used to spend hours upon hours just watching TV and now, while I still have a few shows I like to watch, I really feel like I’m just wasting time if I’m sitting in front of the TV. Even going out to a movie I find to be more enjoyable than just staying at home. Here’s where the problem comes in. My wife does not share my desire to be almost constantly on the go. She likes to go to work come home and just relax. Nothing wrong with that and she does on occasion want to go out or go for a walk, etc., but she is much more content just chilling out at home than I am. It’s really become an issue because she doesn't want to hold me back from doing things, doesn't want me to become resentful of her if I don’t go do things and yet she does not want to be left home alone frequently either. I never thought anything like this would come from me doing something to lose weight and better my health.

In moving into maintenance I really analyzed what I was doing pre surgery that got me to where I was. How did I continue to gain year after year? It turned out to be pretty simple. I had no accountability and knowledge of what I was actually putting into myself. I ate what ever I wanted, as much as I could and never bothered to think about just how much it actually was. Combine that with never knowing what my actual weight was and it's a pretty easy recipe for super morbid obesity. I lived in a fog created by my own ignorance and apathy. My approach to maintenance has been to do what I was not doing before. I hold myself accountable. I weigh myself once a week. My daily food intake is still pretty consistent and I'm very conscientious about what and how much I'm eating. I am not as regimented and restrictive as I was when I was in losing mode, but I know that I can't down a half gallon of ice cream and expect it to not be detrimental. I have an acceptable weight range I want to be in and if I get out of that range I go back to logging everything again. The stress and emotional eating will likely always be my biggest hurdle and I know know that. I know that when things get stressful, etc. I need to be more diligent and pay attention. I have even found that when I am experiencing stressful times, I will go back to logging everything, just as an extra level of awareness. Damn this taking the easy way out sure seems like a lot of work. But sooooo worth it!

Try going with, "What? Are you saying I was Fat before?"

Not rambling at all. You have done an outstanding job of understanding what I was asking about. There will likely be differences in most relationships as people grow and change. My main curiosity was this internal drive to nearly always be busy. Thanks again to everyone for the comments.

Nothing to be sorry about, thanks for the input. Yeah we have talked about it, to great lengths. I'm sure the relationship will work out. I really never expected this amount of desire to be on the go. Can't say I'm disappointed about it though.

I absolutely look deflated. What surprises me most is how much it bothers me. Losing as much as I have it is perfectly logical that the package that once contained 300 lbs more of me, is going to be saggy. The the reality is that I went from being the fat guy to being the old guy. The additional skin at my check and abdomen I expected as a by product of the loss, but I never thought the extra skin on my face and neck would give me the aged appearance I have. I was at the beech recently and was saddened by my new reality. I used to not take my shirt off because of my size, man boobs, ext., now I don't take it off because I look like I've melted. At times it is a struggle emotionally to remember and account for all the good that has come from this weight loss when everyday getting out of the shower I'm reminded of just where I am now at. I have a plastics consult scheduled for Oct 8 and hope to be able to shed this last remnant of who I used to be.

I have not heard the 4oz in an hour recommendation, outside of the first thing I drank post op. The approximate capacity of the sleeve is 4oz once the swelling goes down, but the reason to drink slowly is because you only have 15% of the volume you used. I know that was one of the hardest things for me, because I could easy down a 20oz pop with one gulp pre op. The first time post op I took a big drink in the manner I used to, it was a pain that I still remember. I do want to ask you about something though. You said, " I'm not in pain really, didn't feel too uncomfortable." that to me means that there was some discomfort at the very least. There should not be. If there is any discomfort, you drank too fast. Slow down, you racing or something?

You wont be disappointed Gardengirl.