lyndeeboo

What a great way for me to look at this entire journey - - that this surgery and the rest of my life will be my 'rehab'. SInce I am not powerful enough to do this LONGTERM on my own, the sleeve will be a real-life rehab...one that will enable me to not fall off the wagon so easily. I am grateful to you for sharing this because this truly has been a light-bulb moment for me. I want to congratulate you on getting approval! For me this entire time my focus has been on getting 'approved'...even though I'm not yet approved, after sitting through my last nutrition appointment it hit me that IF approved this thing is REAL and lifelong..and for a few minutes I let it scare the crap out of me. Thank you for your reply, I appreciate you so much!

WOW, 7 miles! I truly admire that. I know it can be done...I've seen people transform their lives to include running...I just want to be one of those people. It's funny that you said even when you could run you still hated it! I think that will be me. I don't see myself ever loving it...but I want to!!! That should count for something, don't ya think!!! I wonder if anyone 'hates' food the way I hate running?

What is VLCD? going to have to google the Bernstien diet Okay, so you're saying that you lost most cravings?!?! That is incredible and really DOES give me hope! I can't even imagine having to REMIND myself to eat....ahhhh what a beautiful day that will be But what in the world cost $600 a month???

I am going to get that book, thank you so much!!! This forum is so amazing to me and such a wealth of knowledge and so supportive. Thank you! When you say you're trying to find something outside of food to comfort you...I want to be a runner. I HATE running. But I've long lusted after the thought of transforming my huge, flabby body in to a runner's body...even though right now I hate to run..in fact I can't run. At all. Not even a few steps! But you just saying that you want to find something thta comforts you outside of food just gave me the crazy notion that maybe somehow, someway, I can make running my obsession. For this out-of-shape body, how cool would that be?!?!

She might just be a vegetarian She didn't say I couldn't have it, but said that most people choose to not eat it after surgery because it is much harder to digest. I don't even have steak very often (3 kids ages 5 and under...steak is a luxury!) but every once in awhile when Hubbs and I go to dinner kid free (once a year!) there is nothing better than a good, juicy steak! The thought of not getting to ENJOY that every once in awhile made me a little sad....and then the thought that I was getting SAD over FOOD that I hadn't even had taken away from me made me MAD AT MYSELF!!! How foolish that I've let food control my thoughts so much That is great to hear that you can still eat meats. Not that I couldn't live without them, I just want that choice

Did you do your sleep study yet?

Crap, I NEVER saw this. I'm so sorry! It went good! I passed, so one more thing crossed off my check list of things to do. the one thing I didn't like was i had a male technician....it ended up being just fine, it was just the whole metal thing of knowing that it was just me and another guy alone in a building and if he decided to rape and pilage me no one would ever hear my screams...I woke up the next morning fine and untouched and realized how silly I had been I have my psych evaluation scheduled for next Friday and then will have one last nutrition appt before I've met my insurance requirements. Although getting excited I started to have a mild panic attack (not really panic attack, just emotions!) about how REAL this is all becoming. I'm so addicted to food and the comfort that it gives to me that I am having serious questions of whether or not I am strong enough to give it up. I HATE to be...my kids NEED me, but holy heck, I am so attached to it. I also decided to not have the surgery in May/June which is when I thought I would have it (providing I get approval when I first submit!) and actually wait until August'ish. I have a family reunion I'd like to attend (haven't gone in 7 years) and it's a 12-hr drive, each way. That would have been about 3 weeks after surgery and thought that wasn't a great idea. Then my best friend is visiting from out of California the very next week, and then in July we're having a big birthday party for my little guy. I want to set myself up for success and not failure and don't want to allow myself to be in situations where I might be tempted to slip something I otherwise wouldn't be exposed to if that makes sense. So anyway, I'm thinking the end of July/middle of August would be great....and well before the Holiday's so I can be one sexy lady by then!!!

I had my 3rd nutrition appointment yesterday and I am scared! I KNOW that the benefits outweigh the stuff I’m going to have to give up, I just need to get these thoughts on to paper…maybe that will help. I’m feeling guilty that I’m even having these thoughts because I want this surgery so badly. I worry that if I’m having these thoughts am I going to fail, or is this what everyone else thinks prior to surgery and this is normal??? Here is what worries me. One of the things she said was after surgery, don’t drink water (or any other beverage) 30 minutes before, don’t drink during and don’t drink an hour after a meal. When I asked why she said that water speeds up the digestion process and will cause your teeny stomach to digest even faster, which will make you hungry earlier. Makes sense, but I don’t like it! I ALWAYS drink water with my meals, always. I know that in the grand-scheme of things not drinking water at a meal isn’t a big deal…for a few meals, but for the rest of my life??? next is eating meat. She said that after surgery a lot of people can’t really digest meat any longer. She also said that meat isn’t really all that great for you (I’ve heard this before) so that it’s really not a big deal. Well I know health-wise it’s not a big deal, but after having such a love-affair with food for so long, I worry that I will be sad when I can’t order a nice, juicy steak. It’s easy to say something isn’t a ‘big deal’ when you’re not an addict. I’m a food addict. Everything when it comes to food is a ‘big deal’. Portion sizes. She said that your portion size goes down to like the size of the palm of your hand. Holy cow. I don’t eat to be “full” I eat, and eat and eat because I like the flavor of food…to only be able to eat that small of a portion….will I regret having this surgery and will that in turn make me miserable? I WANT to give up needing the comfort of food. I WANT to not overeat any time I sit down to a meal. I want to have something stronger than ME controlling what I put in to my mouth because I just can’t control what I eat at times. I’ve tried so hard and after a few weeks of great will power I succumb and let weeks of good choices go down the drain in a few meals. I know that on the outside looking in these are all really stupid reasons to be concerned. I know that when I read them tomorrow I will look at them and wonder what I was thinking. But right now, today, right in this moment I wonder if the fact that I’m having these thoughts means that I am not in the right place, mentally to have the surgery. Ugh, this sucks! I guess yesterday in talking about everything it just hit me hard that once I have this there’s no going back. Don’t get me wrong - - once I leave this fat, unhealthy body I don’t WANT to go back to where I am right now…it’s just so final and official. I HATE FOOD AND THE CONTROL IT HAS OVER ME!!! I hate the fact that I am doing things to my body that I know if it continues will kill me, yet I am questioning letting it go...I hate this. I think for the first time in my life I am feeling what a drug-user feels! The 'knowing' that you need to give something up, yet the longing for the relationship and comfort that it gives. Not cool, not wanted and not welcome in my brain!

My thought is, although having surgery, the only way you will be successful IS modifying your diet and exercising, so even if you didn't mention you had surgery, telling someone you're seeing a nutritionist and doing a doctor supervised low carb, high exercise diet isn't lying!!! Not to mention, anyone I do tell (very few people) will KNOW that they're one of the 'chosen' few and wouldn't think I was being a liar, just not telling ALL of the information...since they will know my decision is on a need to know basis I'd have to think they would expect such an answer

What a great idea. Thank you for sharing! I'm still in the qualifying stage with insurance but would love to start making small changes now...adding protein to my coffee instead of creamer is a great change I can incorporate

I'm currently in the process of fulfilling insurance requirements so we're looking at a timeline of around June'ish. I will get done with the requirements the early part of May then they said that insurance companies take between 2-3 weeks to send back approval should they approve. Once i have the approval they will look at his schedule and see what is available. I have a family reunion the second week of June in Illinios (about a 10-hour drive) so I think I will choose to do it when we return so I'm not on the road and away from my doctor if needed

That's great to hear that he's come highly reccomended! I really haven't heard ANYTHING negative about him...just wanted to put his name out there one more time in case anyone knew of any reason I should find a new doctor. That makes me feel GREAT that no one is speaking up!!! Who are you using as a surgeon?Thank you for your response. Good luck with your procedure!!!

Awesome update! Hope your meeting goes great!!!

First, just because you spoke about sex doesn't mean you've already jumped in to bed with this guy. It's never too late to change how far you go until you've already gone 'there'. If you're already regretting going too far in a conversation then tell him this. If he doesn't want to meet you because of it, then he really wasn't THAT great of a guy to start out with. Him not being receptive to your feelings and wishes now should be a HUGE red flag that he only wants one thing. I don't know you or him, BUT, if you've only been speaking a week and you're already having doubts about how far you should go, DON'T HAVE SEX YET. END OF DISCUSSION. if you're already regretting going too far in a conversation, imagine how you will feel Saturday morning after actually doing the deed. If you truly are looking for a relationship and not just a boy-toy I wouldn't jump in to bed with him yet. Is that me saying that no great, long-term relationships start out having sex the same week you meet? Absolutely not. My husband and I actually slept together much sooner than I normally would and we're now happily married...BUT, I was in college, looking to have a good time and wasn't going in to the night emotionally clinging to the hope that we would fall madly, deeply in love with each other and have lots of babies together. I wanted FUN and I got FUN. It wasn't until much later I got the ring and babies and all of that. It sounds to me like you're wanting LOVE...which is GREAT! Everyone DESERVES to be in a loving, long term relationship if that's what they want - - I just know a LOT of girls who are wanting the exact same thing you're wanting, they find a guy, give him what he wants right away, and then he's gone....that, or he ONLY wants them for sex, not a long term relationship because that is what they TRAINED HIM TO EXPECT!!! If you jump in to bed with someone right away they don't HAVE to get to know your likes and dislikes, they don't have to do sweet things to earn your respect and body. Just ask yourself this: Are you hoping for long term or a one night stand? If you're hoping for long term, don't sleep with him this Friday and tell him how you're feeling silly and regretting speaking about it so soon. If he feels more about you than a bootie call he will laugh at your honesty and you'll be good. If you just want fun, and you're not going to regret anything should things not work out, then go have fun

My insurance coverage is slightly screwey and honestly I won't know until I'm on the operating table if I'll be covered/approved. My primary insurance (through my employer) is blue cross blue shield. They do NOT for ANY reason, for ANY person cover ANY TYPE of bariatric surgery. Like it's stated on one of the first pages of the policy. The way my work has the policy set up there is no way to opt out of blue cross coverage, therefor it MUST be my primary (unless i quit working!). My husband added me to Aetna so that I could have the surgery. But since Aetna is secondary, we have to submit everything to Blue cross, get a nasty letter back saying (again and again and again!) that these tests associated with bariatric surgery are not covered and THEN I have to submit the bill to aetna. So far Aetna has yet to cover anything since I keep getting letters back from them saying that because I have primary insurance my primary insurance will have to cover me....it's been a LOT of hours and tears making phone calls...and I'm not even halfway through yet!!! SO if I finally get that beautiful letter stating aetna approves me it's going to be a beautiful day Until then, I will continue fulfilling all of their requirements and fighting with them and blue cross ! Oh you poor thing to have to pump while away from your baby. Not that pumping is bad! Just the fact that you won't be able to get a good night's sleep Hopefully it will all work out and you will fall right back to sleep each time after pumping. Good luck! I will let you know how the sleep study goes after this weekend.

I hadn't even thought about having to go back if they determine I have sleep apnea---ugh! Thank you for the advice and info...hadn't even thought about possibly being tired from not sleeping! Good luck on getting fitted, hope that goes nice and smooth!

You are NOT screwed up!!! I have the same thoughts from time to time. I worry that I want this surgery and new lifestyle so bad - NOW - but what if after having it for a year or two I 'fall off the wagon' so to speak as I've done a hundred times before and this entire process is a complete waste. Right now I can say that won't happen, but I've said that before when successful at a diet and I always end up in the same place. It's scary, but one thing I know for sure is that if I continue down the path I'm on now I won't be here to watch my kids grow up. I just wanted you to know that you're not alone. This isn't a fun journey, but when I look at success pictures of other members I know that it's possible and I know I can do it. And, you can too

I know I can just google this, but what is a Nike Fuel band?

ahhhhhhhmazing!!!! What an inspiration you are to all of us!!! Great job!!! If I look half as good as you do when I'm done with all of this mess I will be one happy girl

So cool that we're on the same timeline, I've wanted someone to keep up with! If you don't mind me asking, where do you live? I'm assuming you're insurance, who is your insurance through? I live in north East Texas and have insurance through Aetna. I'm also super nervous about the sleep study. I have a hard time falling to sleep at night (lay in bed thinking of the gazillion things I didn't get done for the day) and I also sleep with my mouth open at night and sometimes drool - - the thought of someone possibly watching me is not cool!!! Keep me posted on your stuff! I'm going to go add you as a friend right now

Thank you ALL! You've all confirmed that I'm making the right decision!!!

I've been around the block when it comes to deciding on a procedure and a doctor. When I first started this journey I thought I wanted the lapband. I went to see Dr. Nick at the Nicholson clinic and the same day had another appointment at True Results Richardson. When I went to see Dr. Nick he went over all three procedures (lapband, sleeve and bypass). Because of my weight and because I live so far away (3 hours) he highly suggested the sleeve instead of the band. When I left his office I wanted to be sleeved. Then I walked in to True Results and they proceeded to scare the heck out of me about the sleeve procedure and I decided to be banded again. I continued going to True Results for the past 2 months but just couldn't get over a funky feeling I was having about not being sleeved. I know there is war-stories with ANY procedure (I shouldn't say 'war stories' because I know that there is TRULY complications that can arise), but I somehow kept finding posts about people having terrible complications with their band and either having to have revision surgery, or being SO sick they couldn't have anything once the band was removed. THAT scared me. The straw that broke the camel's back was when I saw a post that said if you're considering the surgery center in Richardson, and then said the surgeons name, RUN AS FAST AS YOU CAN. I felt as though that was the Lord speaking to me. I called Dr. Nicholson's clinic and they were happy to take me back. Now my question is, is he a good surgeon? I had read review after review on the lapband forum about what a top-of-the-line surgeon he is, but I'm having a hard time finding people on the sleeve forum who are saying the same things. I'm not finding anything BAD about him but I don't want 'good enough'. I want the BEST. Opinions? Is there any where on this forum I can search for his name and find other patients that have used him???

In the whole grand-scheme of things this really isn't a big deal, but for me it is confirmation that I am on my way to changing my life. My sleep study has been scheduled and will be tomorrow night! I also will have my 2nd (of 4) nutrition appointment next week. When that one is done I'm halfway to meeting the insurance requirements! Woooohoooo!!! if things keep going on track, I'm shooting for the end of June for my surgery (that's giving insurance 2-3 weeks for approval).

WOW! You are an entirely new person! Your results are fantastic and you give me hope that I can have the same results. I am sooooo happy for you When they say 'a picture is worth a thousand words' they must have had YOU in mind!

That is SO exciting! Congrats