1-6-09

I went to the Y this morning and walked in the river for 35 minutes and then did 45 minutes of water arobics. Feeling really good then came home and ate all the stuff I shouldn't have. For two years I have sat here and wrote all the same things. Why do I do this. Why do I just keep on doing the wrong things. Why don't I feel like I deserve this. Why don't I love myself enough to do this.

I know I don't feel good most of the time and I know that my weight is most of the problem. I have to lose weight so the will do the knee replacements so I will start to feel better. So why don't I just do it. What keeps me from doing what I know I should do.