Day 187 - Two Weeks Stall

So close yet so far. I have been on a two week stall. It’s crazy. I am really trying hard not to freak out. I have been under a lot more stress lately. About a month ago, my older brother had heart failure. It was really scary. They were not sure if he was going to make it…but he did…now he is living with me…for now.

My brother is morbidly obese, drank heavily, and was not taking his high blood pressure meds. Since moving in, he has gotten the blood pressure under control, quit drinking because now he can’t or it will kill him, and he has loss 30 lbs. in 30 days! As a heart patient myself, it was easy for me to tell him what he needed to change in his diet and near death experiences can be pretty motivating. But it made me a little sad that I could not stick to my own advice 5 years ago which lead me to having WLS to begin with. Then again, as I watched his pain and fear, I realized that I made the right decision for myself 6 months ago. I will be honest with you…there was the little bit of doubt in the back of my mind up until that day…could I have done it on my own…maybe I could had…No…watching him there in the hospital bed with all the machines and the wires and the doctors…No…I could not have done this on my own. If I did not take this step, that could have been me all over again. My weight and my eating habits were slowly killing me. I did not do this to look thin. I did this because I wanted to live…and live well…and live happy and so now I am living well and happy for the first time in my life.

But back to my stall, this has been the longest stall so far. I really should not complain because I am 4’ 11’ and 123 lbs with according to the BMI chart I am NORMAL!!!! I passed my personal goal of 130 about 3 weeks ago but I am 3 lbs shy of my doctor’s goal. I really wanted to be there by this Friday for my 6 month follow up.

I did finally join a gym last week but I have only gone once…I feel out of place there…so many mirrors. Still not used to seeing myself. Also…tee hee…when I went to the gym several men were checking me out…tee hee. Not used to that either. I am definitely going today. I am hoping to lose at least 1 lb before I Friday.