Greetings!

So, yesterday I consulted with Dr Abdulsalam Al Taie...he has his own clinic in Jumeirah - I was very intimidated at the thought of speaking to someone - I felt worthless and a bit of a failure, truth be told...but, I liked him. Alot. He has performed over 1300 of the sleeve surgeries and is cocky to boot, but with his experience, I guess he is allowed to be. I felt comfortable though - for some reason I mix well with cocky men - I think I find them challenging... He also performs a lot in the UK, in Manchester, which is right next to my city so that was kind of a comfort. He gave me a great price so I am hoping to go for this surgery in April...depending on whether I can get care for my little one - I wont be able to lift her for 7 - 10 days...that is my primary concern, if I am honest. So I have to constantly remind myself that in the long run, 2 weeks without lifting my angel is nothing in the great scheme of things...

After my consultation, I had coffee with my two lovely friends - one who is having the sleeve a week today and the other who is my inspiration...

My mum flies out on Thursday - to tell or not to tell. I am kind of worried about telling her to be honest. She would absolutely kill me if I didnt tell her I was going for surgery of any kind - my fear is about her talking me out of it...mentally I am in a good place about this right now.

My head wanders back to a colleague who had the sleeve over the summer holidays a year ago - I remember her being brutally ill - she had infections and to be honest, looked and felt deathly ill for a while.

I know that for the first couple of months it is going to be tough but I am scared of being ill...

Is it really bad to admit that I dont read the negative experiences? I think that people with food issues have a different psychology - an addictive mindset. I have been addicted to many things in my life - food, sex, alcohol, smoking...trying to fill the unfillable void. But with attending certain meetings (I cannot mention which - and yes, they ARE here in DXB - personal message me for details if you want them) and completely overhauling my faith, lifestyle and strength, I feel ready for this.

I am concerned that the couselling side of this surgery is not really addressed here in DXB. Which is why I am grateful for this site and being able to speak with people who have experienced the same things.

One thing I have learnt so far in this process...I am very much the typical Brit - my philosphy of "Keep calm and carry on" is very much being applied to this process!

Love and light xxx