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Fat = Selfish



I feel selfish being fat. Let me explain. This consumes me. It has consumed my life for a long time. I think about it all the time. Maybe even more so now because I am on this incredible journey with finally an awesome opportunity to lose weight. And that is something I have obsessed for .....for a very long time. Now, I feel like I have to focus even more to ensure I don't fail. I feel so self-consumed. So selfish.

I am a stress eater. Well, I used to be. I would eat, no binge like crazy when stressed. I was stressed often. Unfortunately, weight loss surgery did not cut out 85% of my stress.

I am watching my mother in law die from stomach and colon cancer. She was forced to be readmitted to the hospital tonight because she refuses to eat. Here I am with an eating issue, and here she is on the opposite end of it, but needing food if she wants to survive.

So, first I feel selfish to go through this, while she and my husband and his family are dealing with something so much harder. So it stresses me out. And I want to eat.

Tonight I did what any weight loss person could do. I binged....on some chocolate milk. In reality, I only had about 7 or 8 oz, but it was 2% and was, like I said, chocolate. Luckily I did good all day with my carb and calorie intake so I did not go over 800 calories for the day, but the point was I did not have the control over it in this time of intense stress.

I feel so sad to see my family go through this, and so selfish to still be focusing on something so...I don't want to say not serious, but in comparison...it seems like it.

I feel selfish that I needed this surgery. That I needed the help. That I needed this me time. Right in the middle of all this. I just don't want to put my kids through anything that I can help later in life. It just hurts too bad too see the family like this....I guess I am just justifying my feelings of selfishness by thinking it will prevent any pain in the future. Who knows....


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Well written, exactly what I also feel. If I was a drug addict or an alcholic, I couldnt be any more selfish that a food addict. It has cost un countable loss and damages. It is as sick a cult as I can derive. I hope to get free.

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Now ladies....How bout looking from a different angle because I was with you both at first... When...is the last time YOU bought YOU something? When did you last do something special for YOU? How long do your your children deserve to have their mom around? Do your grandchildren deserve the privelege of loving their Gma...and better yet how long do those grandbabies deserve the right to have you around?

WLS is not selfish in any form or fashion....Your health is a bennefit to you kids/spouse/family/friends/ and employers....

I look at the $8750 I just spent and think...well my hubby has 2 4 wheelers ($5000 each) and my kids have enough clothes to clothe half of Africa....now the last time I bought something for me?? well it was about 5 yrs ago when the airline lost my luggage and sent me a check to clothe my naked self...

Now your Health is worth millions to your kids/grandbabies...

Good luck Ladies!

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