I feel gross.

So for the first time since my pre-op diet I CHEATED and I feel TERRIBLE. Like. physically, I feel sick. So not worth it!

I have been really stressed out with school and for me that's a major eating trigger. I had bought a rotisserie chicken to use for dinner tonight thinking I would save myself some cooking time. I hadn't had one since I was a kid and forgot how greasy they are. I had a bit, and my sides, nothing major. Then later in the middle of writing a paper, I started thinking about how I didn't feel full. I didn't feel HUNGRY, but I wasn't feeling stuffed to the gills like I used to all the time. So even though I had just drank a glass of water, I ate a bunch of this nasty greasy chicken and was washing it down with chocolate soy milk. Literally, doing everything I shouldn't all at once. Now I just feel sick to my stomach, super guilty, and ashamed. I know its one of those things that everyone does at some point, but I didn't have to do it. I made a choice to do it. I did it anyway, know full well of the consequences. Such a dumb thing to do.

The more I get into this process the more I realize I think I truly have an eating addiction. It sounds so over dramatic, but I don't know how else to describe it. Has anyone else struggled with this?