My Head is a Tornado

That is, it's all over the place and full of air. Plus the occasional non sequitur flies out like a tossed cow, not that I advocate airbourne cows.

My surgery is in a little over a month and it seems my brain is determined to be on holiday until then. I might as well tack a giant "gone fishing" sign on my cube to go with my "This station is out of fuel" sign (a small perk of working with petrochemical companies is you can pilfer amusing signs as you're tearing down the gas station).

I clearly remember when I was 10 and thinking how awesome it would be to start middle school looking like a normal person, and then when I was 13 thinking how cool it would be to be able to show up to my grade 8 grad looking normal, and then when I was 14 to start high school normal, then 19 to start university normal... you get the drift. Aside from a blip during high school when I stopped eating completely for days on end and worked out obsessively to stay at 140 (and passed out in school and had a vaguely vampirish look with sunken eyes due to my lack of nutrients) I've never known a normal weight. So now I have the prospect of being moderately normal and I admit that I just can't stop thinking about it.

This is not good. I have work to do! Your pollution is leaking into the aquifer and tainting the water supply for thousands of people? Whatever... hey, I could shop at ALL the stores in the mall for the first time in 20 years, not just the ONE store that has clothes to fit me. I have been able to keep my mind somewhat on my work, like how I'll be able to get a moon suit that actually fits me so I can work on the juicy contaminated sites, or that I'll maybe be able to get a fall arrest system that isn't a complete feat of mechanical engineering and won't need at least two people to belay... but still it's all about ME. I feel like a freakin' toddler! ME ME ME! Thoughts are all over the place and everywhere but still ME takes up far too much of my thought time. Please tell me this goes away naturally. I don't want to have to hire somebody to come smack me upside the head every 20 minutes, although I'm sure there are co-workers who'll do it for free.

LOL...but haven't you heard? It's all about ME, ME, ME! Feeling good about yourself? Priceless...and I hope it never ends...