I am a 45 yr old female (5'04 200 lbs) who has enjoyed many successes. I had been very happy athlete who has either blended or turned heads in years past. Now, even though I still participate in the challenging Rosarito to Ensenata 50 mile bike ride & many similar rides, I mountain bike, kayak & etc...I don't recognize that REALLY heavy person in all of our photos and certainly don't turn any heads. I have failed at every diet I have attempted. There were short term victories, but in the end here I sit even heavier hoping this will be the perfect fit to my puzzle.

I am paying for this out of my own pocket & have nervous fingers crossed. I would really love to walk by a mirror and not purposefully look away or avoid participating in photos. I would love to start working the other direction in my closet which at this point resembles the Verizon logo of small to large.

Wish me luck in my journey to rescue myself. Funny, I work in law enforcement and have spent the last 15 years (gaining weight) and rescuing everyone else I forgot about me.:thumbup: Thanks for listening.

We all are or were nervous at one time or another during this process.. I am still wondering if I made the right decision. I have lost aprx 28 lbs... But everyone that knows constantly ask... so how much have you lost or was it really worth it... When I finally see the end result then I will be able to answer. So its okay to be nervous... and good luck on being able to look in the mirror though not there yet... I am sure one day I will be

HI why are you paying for it not insurance? I'm 5'4 205lbs with high blood pressure and have blue cross went to the weigh loss centers and it was covered for me. BMI was at 37% I don't look huge because my weight goes all over not just one area. In any case when you do this beware of some of after feelings that can be normal. My band was a week ago friday I suffered horrible back and shoulder pain for several days. Found out this is normal I hated it then I called to go see the Dr. 6 days later for the pain.. Talked about it he gave me more pain meds and do not let yourself be in pain it will stress you out and take longer to heel. Also heres the biggy I was starving my poor husband was doing everything for me from cooking homemade soups to who knows what. When I told the Dr. he said EAT don't make this a misserable experience or it wont work. The band is not tighted when it first goes in so eat whatever you want BUT eat small bites and small amounts chew it until ifeels like baby food. Eat often so you don't feel the growling and hunger pains that I did. I feel so much better and healing faster. My first fill is on Nov. 5th so eating like this now puts me in condition for the fills because the amounts of food will get smaller. But the chewing habits will there for the rest of your life Congrats and good luck

I am soooo nervous too. I am scheduled Jan 15 09...Had to wait due to work..could have it in december but didnt want to have it right before christmas...but anyways, I try to think about the risks that will happen IF I DONT HAVE IT.... I had gestational diabetes with my last pregnancy and borderline diabetic now. As a nurse, I know that is 1 disease I do NOT want, borderline hypertensive....its just a matter of time if I dont get this off. Thats what I try to focus on...Yeah, I wanna look good but health is my main reason. Maybe we can help each other through it....god knows Im gonna need all the help I can get. Good luck and keep us posted!!

Thank you. Your words have already helped me. To answer your question regardding my self-pay situation. I have Blue Cross PPO, a very good insurance I'm told, but I don't meet the criteria for them to pick up any of my costs. Fortunately for me, but not so fortunate for my savings account I have no qualifying health factors. It was thought I might have sleep apnea for no other reason than I snore, but heck the sleep study was worth a try. It was confirmed, I do snore, however I never stopped breathing. Again, lucky for me...Anyway, the possibility of returning to a comfortable size & perhaps not following my family's history of heart attacks will be well worth the investment.

I will start to try to change my habits now. I have been bolting my food (eat now & taste later) for a quite a while, probably a habit picked up at work.

Well good luck if you want a second opinion try those folks at the weight loss centers they seem to work miracles. I wasn't sold on them until I went for a 2nd opinon and afterwards chose them. My dr. I love now he makes so much sense to me when he talks. He gives you his cell phone number so you can call with any questions at any time. Wonderful man kind and caring. Even though they are making the big bucks he still has bedside mannors.I made a mistake tonight and told my husband I was craving mexican food so we went and instead of sharing a dinner we both ordered. Not only was it 30 dollars but I ate maybe a 16th of my dinner such a waste even though he will take it for lunch tomorrow I just wasted food and money. Try to get that in your head as well and just order a side of something or share with your partner or friend. That will help build your savings back up too. Take Care

Where do you live?

Southern California, Just East of Pasadena.

Hi Nibblet and welcome to the forum!

I'm younger then you, but are pretty similiar with our height and weight. I was always around 125 with a nice, curvy body until about 1 year after I got married.

I also paid out of pocket because even if my insurance did cover bariatric surgery, I would not have qualified. My BMI was 37 but I didn't have any recorded co-factors except for slightly elevated blood pressure and cholesterol.

I felt and continue to feel completely comfortable and confident with my surgeon, Dr. John Feng. His office manager is wonderful, and he is beyond personable. After my surgery we played phone tag until he was able to personally reach me, and he continues to check in on me, even if it is JUST to talk....I mean, who does that anymore, right?

My confidence and trust with him has made this pretty scary situation totally fine for me. It also helps that I chose to go for his 5 year instead of 1 year aftercare surgery package.

It's been one of the best decisions for me, and I've already lost a total of 14 pounds (and my surgery was less then 3 weeks ago).

The weight loss centers are all over CA I went to the one in Beverly Hills very nice doctor