As you all can tell from my name I am confused. I am a 38 yo marreid mother of 3. I have battled my weight all my life. Always been "solid".I remember my Mom being happy that I was getting my tonsils out so maybe i would loose weight( I do love my Mom she said this out of love and concern for me).I have been on so many diets I can;t count them anymore. tHe first official diet I went on was in the 8 th grade and the local university's psychology dept.Diets would only work short term.The weight kept creeping back and then some. After each of my children I gained about 20 pounds.2 years ago I started at a weight loss clininc and lost 68 pounds in 6 months . I have gained back 40 of those over the past year.Currently I weigh 270 and am only 5'1" tall.

Yesterday I went to the doctor for a routine check up. i have HTN and asthma. My blood work is completely normal at this point. I asked for a perscription for appetite suppressents. She had offered them to me in the past. She told me no. "It's a bandaid' was her response. She suggested I get lap band surgery.On the way home I cried.I feel like the worlds biggest failure.I have tried to loose weight on my own but I can;t keep it off.I failed.I am scared to get the surgery but I am scared not to.I am stuck.Those of you who have had this surgery would you do it again....are you glad you did it?I really need advice from someone who can understand how I feel.Should I do it??

Your feelings are normal. I think that all of us struggle with the "I'm a failure" piece when we decide to have surgery. For me, I was able to reframe my thinking to realize that far from being a failure, I was being proactive and choosing to make a difference in my life and health.

Whether to have surgery or not is a decision only you can make, and you have to be prepared for the major life changes that are involved. For me, I can tell you that I'm two weeks out from surgery, and I think it was one of the best decisions I've ever made. But it took a lot of emotional, mental, psychological, and spiritual work to be able to make the decision. It also was almost two years from the time I first started considering surgery to the time when I was finally able to decide to have it done.

I would suggest that you find a good therapist to help you with the emotional work that is involved in this (if you don't already have one), because truly it is an emotional ride.

Good luck-I hope you make the right decision for you.

Bryan

Your definitely not a failure. We have probably all been where you are at and feeling what your feeling. Alot of people may say this is the easy way out, even I guess I thought that before I had the surgery. But in all reality this takes a lot of hard work and committment to a healthier lifestyle, the band is just a tool to help you get there and not regain those pounds you work so hard to lose. My only regret as im sure alot of peoples is that I didn't do it sooner. I contemplated it for years but like you wanted to do it myself, then realized I just couldnt keep the weight off. I also am on the short side im only 5feet and was topping 240, i'm so happy I did it. Its only been 2 months since i've been banded and I have not had any problems. I wish you the best of luck.

I am 45, been on anti-depressants off and on for years. Food is an addiction and it is a vicious cycle. I vote you really take a good look at getting a band. I just go mine on Aug.27 and I feel a real sense of peace knowing that I am not alone in the fight anymore. I have a little "cop" inside of me that is going to help me move forward and gain control of my addiction. If I can come off of my meds too, that will be a big bonus. Since being banded I have already dropped my dose and I feel fine. Everything in life happens for a reason and maybe your DR. suggesting this at this time was the universes way of throwing you a life preserver. My 3 Daughters are soooo proud that I have taken this step. Therapy is great but I have been there and done that with 4 different councellors over the years, not one of them was ever able to give me the answer. Your own free will is yours entirely. Best of luck, and just know that you can change your life if it is your wish to do so!

KIM

I absolutely would do it all over again. It took me almost 8 months to finally decide to do it. My surgeon said some people know right away some people take a year to decide but you will know when you are ready.

Even after I decided to do it I was pretty scared, not only of the surgery itself but of failure. Like you I have tried every diet and was able to lose weight but never able to keep it off. I was afraid that this would just be my biggest failure yet.

I think that the surgery would probably work well for you but it doesn't sound like you are quite ready for it just yet. Do a little more research on it and you will know for sure if and when you are ready.

We have all been through this stage of learning and deciding. It is a big decision to make and should not be taken lightly. Of course any surgery comes with risks but as weight loss surgery goes, the Lap Band is pretty safe and it is reversible.

I am three months and two weeks out and am doing great. It takes commitment but is so much better than trying to do it on your own.

It was the best decision I ever made . . . if only I would have done it sooner. The band is 100 times better than any appetite suppresant I have ever tried.

We all have these questions and feel really bad about making a decision to surgically fix something associated with a lot guilt because of feeling like it was a failure in self control.

First off, you are absolutely not a failure. Being overweight is just one part of your life. You should never measure your self worth by your weight. For one thing, you're a mother, the most important job in the world. You sound like a very thoughtful and loving woman, and I'm sure you're children are being raised in a wonderful home. Look at your life, and don't get stuck on diet failures as a measure of your worth.

Secondly, you've had some very successful weight loss victories, but there's just something out of whack when you can lose weight, but not keep it off. I have friends who eat like there's no tomorrow, and they don't gain an ounce. I blame my ancestors. They were rugged pioneers who worked hard, and I'm sure needed a slow metabolism to stay healthy during lean times. Unfortunately, for me, life is just too darn easy. :tt2:

I was used medically prescribed diet pills for weight loss, and they worked great for a short period of time. My body adjusted, and soon, the affect wore off. They really are a short term solution.

I've only been banded for two weeks, and I've lost 20% of the weight I want to lose to be healthy again. Part of that was during my two week pre-op diet. I still have good restriction from being so recently banded, but I can tell you that I've never had this feeling of satiety with so little food. Once I start feeling hungry, I'll be able to get fills that will keep me in this zone. The band isn't magic though. Food cravings can still hit you, you have to make good healthy food choices, and there are changes you'll have to make when you have a lap band. For me, those small sacrifices are worth it. I already feel so much better. My clothes are loose, rather than skin tight. I feel victorious, because I know I'm going to win this battle once and for all.

Good luck with whatever you decide to do. But know, that there is help for you, and you're not alone in this.

Thank you all for your quick response.Your support is overwhelming and much appreciated.This is not a decision I am just pondering. I have thought about it for 2 or more years and have done all the research.2 years ago when I went to the weightloss clinic it was in my mind my final attempt to loose weight before surgery. Surgery seems so permanent.

I have thought about this for so long. Most of my friends do not face the weight loss battle. I needed reassuance that my feelings are normal.You all have given me that.

I am now in the process of finding someone to accept my insurance.Another battle I am afraid.How long does it take form the time you find a doctor have a consultation and then have surgery??I suppose that varies form doctor to Doctor but maybe you al can g

ive me a ball park figure.

I am also 5' 1" and I weigh 217, BMI of 41 - I developed high blood pressure because of the extra weight too. I have tried so many diets that once I researched about all the weight loss surgerys and made the decision to have lap band, I knew it was the right choice for me. I haven't had surgery yet, I just finished my 6 month medically supervised program, met with the surgeon, dietition, and had my psych consult. I'm just waiting for all the papers to be completed and faxed to the insurance company for their approval. Keep thinking about how active you can be if you got the weight off, how you blood pressure will go down and you will feel better and be a happier healthier you. You are not a failure for having lap band - it is a new way of thinking and a tool to help you succeed.

I haven't had the surgery yet, but I can totally understand where your coming from. I'm sure everyone who has had or is is considering this surgery has questioned whether or not its the right decision. For me, I finally decided in July that I've had enough of being obese. For a long time I contemplated having the surgery...when I was diagnosed with sleep Apnea in March of 2007 I thought, this is it, I HAVE to loose this weight, my health is at risk. I finally understood why I was SO tired all the time and why I had no energy to work out, I wasn't really sleeping...I was having around 120 epsiodes of interrupted sleep a night. I knew the sleep apnea was due to my weight and thought, what is happening to me? How did I get this heavy? I tried so many diets over the years but gave up each time, I wasn't getting much results and all it did was make me feel worse about myself...I always felt like a failure. I talked myself out of the surgery the last couple of years because I thought, if I really put my mind to it and stick to something I could do it on my own...but I finally admitted to myslef I needed help. After reserching the Band and reading through all the different forums that are out there, I no longer looked at the band as an easy way out. The Band is the tool that I need, the tool that will help me to finally be rid of this extra person I've been carrying around for years. I'm doing whatever I can to prepare myself for the changes that are ahead...and even though there are foods I will probably no longer be able to eat and soda I can no longer have, it will all be worth it in the end because I'll have my health back and my self confidence!

Do what feels right for YOU...good luck with whatever you decide! Your not alone, remember that!