Great Idea - I will do it right now !!

Hi

I am Janet and I am a recovering food addict :wink2:

I was banded 7/17/07 - My starting weight was 250 - I'm 5'4

Today (just over 10 months out) I am 154 - size 8 pants (was 18/20) Medium tops (was 22/24)

I got banded as I wanted to extend the years that I have left on this planet and to do that I knew that I needed to lose weight.

The band has been the tool I needed. For the first time in my life I have been able to achieve this goal (actually getting to my goal weight)

If you want a buddy - support - help - suggestions - Please feel free to call upon me - I will gladly share my journey with you - the journey is still on going and by helping you I will be helping me (staying motivated and accountable) and then one day you can pay it forward and help someone else.

Good Morning!!!!!!!!! Hubby left really early, so I get to use the computer today. The fill and all that walking at Disneyland worked! I hit 50 pounds today!!!!! I'm not jumping for joy yet, but I am feeling this tremendous sense of relief that I am finally in the game. I've lost 8 pounds since the fill last Wed. morning. I know it's Water weight, but that's fine. As I've said in the past, just seeing the scale move is uplifting.

So it's :

210 -at my heaviest in Jan.

184 -12 days before surgery July 9th

174 -on the day of surgery, July 21st, after being "emptied" out

160 -today.

The doctor counts the weight loss from his presurgical visit, so he would say I've lost 24 pounds in 9 weeks and 5 days. Let's call it 10 weeks. It's still 2.4 pounds a week. It's still 50 pounds in my book, even if my weight went up and down during August and the first week in September.

With all these statistics, I am feeling obsessive compulsive. I need to STOP calculating and just get on the scale periodically. I was feeling so guilty about not losing enough after surgery.

My next goal is the strange number of 153. That's the weight I was at the Dr. Phil show when I met Lori and fit into a couple of nice outfits that I still own.

Janet, thanks for sharing those pictures of yourself. Not only are you thinner now, and certainly younger looking, too, you look healthier and happier. Weight loss makes such a difference in how we look, inside and out. You're brave to share them, brave to travel this road and a hero to us all.

Kathy, I'm not sure how I feel about the fill. Even though I've lost, I don't know how much restriction there is. I'm too scared to try it out, but I have a feeling that I need more and the minute I "slip," I'm afraid I'll be able to eat more than I should.

Becky, Janet's right. 7 pounds in a month is good. We beat ourselves up over statistics, as you see above, when the truth is, before this journey, I could put 7 pounds on in a weekend.

Will talk to you all later. Have to run to take care of my Grandson, then have to return to take care of my parents. Somewhere in there I swear I am going to have to find time to take care of me. Since I can't walk for 6 hours a day at Disneyland, I've got to do something and I haven't found that "something" yet.

Love,

Ellen

P.S. Janet, those little nervous breakdowns were head issues that I had to confront, since I couldn't eat them away! IT WAS HARD! IT WAS NEW! IT WAS SCAREY! I was sad, angry, petulant, tired and a mix of every other emotion I used to stuff down. UGH!

Edited September 15, 200818 yr by wiredshut
forgot something

Good Morning!!!!!!!!! Hubby left really early, so I get to use the computer today. The fill and all that walking at Disneyland worked! I hit 50 pounds today!!!!! I'm not jumping for joy yet, but I am feeling this tremendous sense of relief that I am finally in the game. I've lost 8 pounds since the fill last Wed. morning. I know it's Water weight, but that's fine. As I've said in the past, just seeing the scale move is uplifting.

So it's :

210 -at my heaviest in Jan.

184 -12 days before surgery July 9th

174 -on the day of surgery, July 21st, after being "emptied" out

160 -today.

The doctor counts the weight loss from his presurgical visit, so he would say I've lost 24 pounds in 9 weeks and 5 days. Let's call it 10 weeks. It's still 2.4 pounds a week. It's still 50 pounds in my book, even if my weight went up and down during August and the first week in September.

With all these statistics, I am feeling obsessive compulsive. I need to STOP calculating and just get on the scale periodically. I was feeling so guilty about not losing enough after surgery.

My next goal is the strange number of 153. That's the weight I was at the Dr. Phil show when I met Lori and fit into a couple of nice outfits that I still own.

Janet, thanks for sharing those pictures of yourself. Not only are you thinner now, and certainly younger looking, too, you look healthier and happier. Weight loss makes such a difference in how we look, inside and out. You're brave to share them, brave to travel this road and a hero to us all.

Kathy, I'm not sure how I feel about the fill. Even though I've lost, I don't know how much restriction there is. I'm too scared to try it out, but I have a feeling that I need more and the minute I "slip," I'm afraid I'll be able to eat more than I should.

Becky, Janet's right. 7 pounds in a month is good. We beat ourselves up over statistics, as you see above, when the truth is, before this journey, I could put 7 pounds on in a weekend.

Will talk to you all later. Have to run to take care of my Grandson, then have to return to take care of my parents. Somewhere in there I swear I am going to have to find time to take care of me. Since I can't walk for 6 hours a day at Disneyland, I've got to do something and I haven't found that "something" yet.

Love,

Ellen

P.S. Janet, those little nervous breakdowns were head issues that I had to confront, since I couldn't eat them away! IT WAS HARD! IT WAS NEW! IT WAS SCAREY! I was sad, angry, petulant, tired and a mix of every other emotion I used to stuff down. UGH!

Ellen

:thumbup:CONGRATULATION 50 LBS GONE - WTG:thumbup:

:thumbup:You are doing great - keep up the good work !!!!:embaressed_smile:

As far as being brave - I don't know if that's really true - I know that we are all so much alike - I know you all understand the fat mentallity I had and really still have - Most of us are closet eaters night time eater - we eat cuz all we do is take care of EVERYONE ELSE - We feed ourselves - it our reward for taking care of everything and everyone....

I am getting nervous now about the commercial - do they script it do I - On Friday I was big bad Janet - today I am not so big and bad - more like the scared little 5 yr old on the 1st day of school.

Ellen

:thumbup:CONGRATULATION 50 LBS GONE - WTG:thumbup:

:thumbup:You are doing great - keep up the good work !!!!

As far as being brave - I don't know if that's really true - I know that we are all so much alike - I know you all understand the fat mentallity I had and really still have - Most of us are closet eaters night time eater - we eat cuz all we do is take care of EVERYONE ELSE - We feed ourselves - it our reward for taking care of everything and everyone....

I am getting nervous now about the commercial - do they script it do I - On Friday I was big bad Janet - today I am not so big and bad - more like the scared little 5 yr old on the 1st day of school.

Janet, you are going to be great. You are the doctor's STAR! No matter who scripts, you will do just fine. Think about how far you have come and how you feel about yourself now. You don't have to be BIG bad Janet - you are LITTLE (still bad) Janet and you can do anything you set your mind to do. (hmmm...something tells me you were little bad Janet at age 5, too.) :embaressed_smile:

Janet, I can't tell you don't be nervous about the commercial, because I think "nervous" is a perfectly appropriate emotion for doing something you've never done before. On a psychological level, I don't know if you're the kind of person who finds it hard to accept praise, so on top of a very new and very public experience you are getting tons of praise, which may or may not be hard to take. One last thing this commercial may bring up and that is accountability - to the world! It's a fantastic tool, but for me it would also be scarey one.

So, I'm going to say, "Don't worry," even though you will. Also, I have a funny feeling that the producers will script it or they'll ask you a few questions and "guide" you along the way. If it'll make you feel better, call and ask so you can be prepared. If you speak anywhere near as well as you write, you will be FABULOUS!

Love,

Ellen

Janet, you are going to be great. You are the doctor's STAR! No matter who scripts, you will do just fine. Think about how far you have come and how you feel about yourself now. You don't have to be BIG bad Janet - you are LITTLE (still bad) Janet and you can do anything you set your mind to do. (hmmm...something tells me you were little bad Janet at age 5, too.) :tt1:

No JoannMarie - bad 13 - 14 yr old not 5 yrs - was still a good girl at 5

Janet, I can't tell you don't be nervous about the commercial, because I think "nervous" is a perfectly appropriate emotion for doing something you've never done before. On a psychological level, I don't know if you're the kind of person who finds it hard to accept praise, so on top of a very new and very public experience you are getting tons of praise, which may or may not be hard to take. One last thing this commercial may bring up and that is accountability - to the world! It's a fantastic tool, but for me it would also be scarey one.

So, I'm going to say, "Don't worry," even though you will. Also, I have a funny feeling that the producers will script it or they'll ask you a few questions and "guide" you along the way. If it'll make you feel better, call and ask so you can be prepared. If you speak anywhere near as well as you write, you will be FABULOUS!

Love,

Ellen

Thanks Ellen - I am going to call in a few ... Since I haven't heard from the Doctors Office ... I am not as elequounat as you or JoannMarie - I think you both are really good at geting your point accross... I struggle in getting mine across I feel - but that's ya I will do ok- it's the unknown..

Thanks you guys forthe encouragement - Heck I do speak better cuz I don't have to type or spell :biggrin:

First, Ellen, CONGRATS!!! Hitting 50 is a major milestone. I can picture you now at Dr. Phil. For reference I am a little less than when we first met but about 8 lbs heavier than when the season ended. I have pics in my camera but I am such a clutz at downloading them.

Janet, you are going to do great in the commercial. I hope there'll be a link some where where we can watch it.

I had an awesome day. I went shopping with my daughter. First we went to Express, her favorite store. I showed her a sweater I thought was cute and she said I should try one on too as they had XL's. So I did and IT FIT!! it was on sale so I had to buy it. Next stop Ann Taylor. We were walking by and she knew that every time I got by I say some day I am going to be able to shop in there. So we went to 'look around'. She convinced me to try on a few tops and they all fit! One I really liked was $54 and I didn't want to spend the money on it, so she got it for me. What a daughter. It was the one that when I had it on in the dressing room I got very emotional and started blubbering and crying like a baby. LOL I bought the other 2 as they were buy one get one 50% so I had to have both of course!! I can see this is going to be dangerous as the temptation is there to buy all these clothes now, for once I am beginning to care how I dress and look. But I don't want to spend a fortune on a wardrobe yet as I am barely half way to goal. It will be awhile before I can fit in Misses pants as i carry all my weight in my butt and legs. Not that my boobs and chest are small by any means!!

Hi everyone tonight, I know that loosing 7 lbs in a month is great. I am not complaining about what I have lost. I am thrilled with it. What does bother me though is that I have had to work my &^($@#$%! off to get to this point. I want some help for my hunger. I do great when I am not hungry but I think the fill would really help make it a little easier for me. This is only my second fill if I get one so I am pretty glad for what I have lost so far. I just want to keep this thing going steady. I have been hungry all week this week for some reason. Janet, just strut out there in front of the camera and smile real big, do a turn and tell your story in a short version. You will do great. Think of all of us when you are in there. I walked one fast mile today, had nails done tonight and now I am going to bed. Talk with you all later.

Beckyo

Dear Lori,

I am so happy for you! What an amazing day and what a beautiful daughter you have! Those are the kinds of days we put in our memory bank and take out whenever we want to smile! XL - WOW! I want to be there too!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can picture you now and it's kind of nice to "see" you.

Have another GREAT day.

Love,

Ellen

Hi everyone tonight, I know that loosing 7 lbs in a month is great. I am not complaining about what I have lost. I am thrilled with it. What does bother me though is that I have had to work my &^($@#$%! off to get to this point. I want some help for my hunger. I do great when I am not hungry but I think the fill would really help make it a little easier for me. This is only my second fill if I get one so I am pretty glad for what I have lost so far. I just want to keep this thing going steady. I have been hungry all week this week for some reason. Janet, just strut out there in front of the camera and smile real big, do a turn and tell your story in a short version. You will do great. Think of all of us when you are in there. I walked one fast mile today, had nails done tonight and now I am going to bed. Talk with you all later.

Beckyo

Dear Becky,

Boy do I understand about the hunger! Mine is head hunger, but it's just as destructive and disheartening. I hit 50 pounds yesterday and should have had a fabulous day, but didn't.

Last night I felt sad, overwhelmed and angry, too. I'm so busy taking care of everyone else, that I'm exhuasted. So last night, I had my first binge and NOTHING came back, so I guess I need another fill and it's not even a week since my first. I was up all night, not in physical discomfort, but so ashamed of myself, so upset that I slipped and so sad overall.

The healthiest thing I did was come here to "write" this morning. I wish I could have done that last night, but now that my parents each have their own bedrooms and my grandson has the third, the computer is in our master bedroom and I couldn't wake hubby. He's got a huge board meeting and is dealing with own "stuff" right now. With everyone here, I went from a four bedroom house to a one bedroom!!!!!

Well, I'm going to take everyone's advice. I am going to throw away a lot of food today. Although last night I would have eaten ANYTHING! I've already had a talk with my husband today about needing more help around the house and I plan to come here as often as possible today to get me over this hump.

Thans for being there. It's really nice to be able to get "hugs" when you need them.

Love,

Ellen

If it's OK, I'm not going to change my ticker. I put on one pound overnight; I'm hoping to take it off SOON!

Ellen, I think it's an unwritten rule around here, never change your ticker going up, it will go back down soon. At least that is what I do. Does your grandson live with you too? I've heard it said where we are the sandwich generation in that we have elderly parents to take care of and then young ones as well whether the younguns are our own or grandchildren. You so need some time for yourself. Is there anyway you can get a day off? Go to a spa, go shopping, or just take a walk in the park? They say we are better caretakers if we take care of ourselves first and that is so hard to do because: a) we feel selfish if we do, and finding the time to do so. That pound is probably just fluid, no way did you eat 3500 calories. Drink lots of water today and see if you can't flush it out.

I wonder about another fill myself. I've not lost, am hungry more. But on the other hand when I eat I have to be very careful as things get stuck a lot if I don't chew chew chew and take tiny bites. So seems there's restriction there, maybe it's a head battle. And I'm not losing!

Good Morning Ladies

Lori - Congrats on your XL's - Fantastic !!!!

Becky - You are doing great !! Again, I don't find my band takes away my hunger/cravings - I didn't get alot of response on my poll - especially from long time bander's - I was disappointed. If I remember correctly 40% said it took away their hunger - 40% said they were still hungry but were full longer - the other 20% were in the middle. But again no too many long time bander's - so I guess for some it does - for others it doesn't

It's been a full moon this week - so maybe that's it - plus winter is coming and we want to add the fat for winter protection - this yr no fat - just buy a coat:lol:

Ellen - Yep you have your hands full - Being exhausted is a big food trigger - good for you to get rid of the stuff in the house - I am totally about avoidance - it the crap is there I will eat... So for me it's just not there - My DS is visiting - he had reese pb cups - just cuz I knew they were in the house I wanted one - if it's not there I won't go out and get it so I am fine - but they were calling my name - well lucky for me there was only 1 left - I ate it

You do need to carve sometime for yourself - and you must enlist the help of your family - I know when my Dad was in ICU and I was at the hospital from 8 a.m.(he was back on the respirator) my DS came and we took off to the beach for about an hour - just sitting out there reminiscing about how we came there when DS was a kid was the most rejuvenating thing I could have done for myself..

When is your next fill??

Lori - Sounds like you do have restriction

Ladies - This whole weight loss game is a mostly a head game (you really gotta get your head in the game. This is why I have never thought of it as a diet - be a new lifestyle change - Yes there are times we are going to fall... But the main thing is that we IMMEDIATELY pick ourselves us and move forward - Which you are all doing - you now thing about when you eat what you eat and how much you eat - as each day passes it will get a little easier and with proper restriction too...

You are all strong women you can do this

Hugs All Around - Cyber Group Hug:grouphug:

Ok everyone - can I whine a little? I'll preface my comments by saying I know the band is only a tool, I have to do the work....

But, I can eat absolutely anything I want, anytime I want and as much as I want. I was doing so good until I realized that. Now, I seem to be returning to very bad habits. I'm so disappointed with myself. My first fill last week did nothing. I can't have another one for a month. I'm so discouraged.

Any ideas, help, suggestions, kick in the pants?

I did hear this great quote the other day: "Hope is not a strategy". I guess my hoping I'll loose weight isn't going to do it. I need to do it!

Kathy

Ellen - Yahoo on 50lbs down!!!!

Ok everyone - can I whine a little? I'll preface my comments by saying I know the band is only a tool, I have to do the work....

But, I can eat absolutely anything I want, anytime I want and as much as I want. I was doing so good until I realized that. Now, I seem to be returning to very bad habits. I'm so disappointed with myself. My first fill last week did nothing. I can't have another one for a month. I'm so discouraged.

Any ideas, help, suggestions, kick in the pants?

I did hear this great quote the other day: "Hope is not a strategy". I guess my hoping I'll loose weight isn't going to do it. I need to do it!

Kathy

Ellen - Yahoo on 50lbs down!!!!

Kathy

Take the word HOPE out of your vocabulary and replace with WILL...

You don't have restriction, so your tool isn't working properly - and even when it does - you do have to work at this - You really do..

Why can't you get in before a month... Can't you call your doctor and up the appointment - My 1st fill felt for only like a week or so - I called and upped my appointment (from Nov to Oct my 1st fill 9/8).

Are you eating hard Proteins or slider foods - even with restriction I can eat sliders with no problem - today my lunch was soft - ground turkey rice corn in tomato sauce ate 1 1/2 cups - I never got full - am hungry still it's only 1:30 - So what will I do - Drink my Water - around 3 will have a little snack (apple) which should tied me over til tonite..

Kathy - The saying goes - "just cuz you can doesn't mean you should" - old timers are always spouting this to the newbies - you just have to eat healthy - concentrate on that and only that - if at dinner you eat 2 cups of veggies instead of 1 so what.. Just stay away from the junk and if it's in the house get rid of if - If it's not there you can not eat it...

Here's a exerpt from something I wrote a while back..

It was stated if you could do this pre-band then you wouldn't need the band - to a point I agree as the band is a portion control device but that’s all it is - you control the calories

If you want to be successful you have to make a commitment to changing your eating habit and add exercise into your life. It's not that one piece of cake that made you fat - it was eating the whole damn thing. You can still have cake, candy, fried foods - but only occasionally - not ever day. You have to allow wiggle room (not room enough for another person) to live a normal life - but you have to retrain your brain too.

IMHO this is a lifetime lifestyle change and you can't just rely on the band - you need to learn a new healthy way of eating in combination with the restriction that your band provides if you are going to be successful in the long run.

Call your darn doctor - demand an earlier appointment - tell them your tool isn't working up to par and that you didn't get a tool installed for it not to work...

Hugs - Janet

Hi tonight, I went to the Dr. today and my second fill was.05cc. My first was 1.2cc. I think that this fill was very conservative if you ask me. I am going to wait a few days and see if this helps my hunger issues. I guess some people do get that small of a fill but I really expected more. I sure hope this helps me. He said that this much can really make a difference on some people. We will see. I was kind of dissapointed today but four more weeks. I got to give it a chance ya know. Okay Becky, be patient!!! Like I said I do just fine most of the time except when I am starving. Enough ranting and raving for now. How is everyone else doing so far?

Beckyo

Hi tonight, I went to the Dr. today and my second fill was.05cc. My first was 1.2cc. I think that this fill was very conservative if you ask me. I am going to wait a few days and see if this helps my hunger issues. I guess some people do get that small of a fill but I really expected more. I sure hope this helps me. He said that this much can really make a difference on some people. We will see. I was kind of dissapointed today but four more weeks. I got to give it a chance ya know. Okay Becky, be patient!!! Like I said I do just fine most of the time except when I am starving. Enough ranting and raving for now. How is everyone else doing so far?

Beckyo

Becky

Yes that is conservative.... Does he do it blind or under fluro (I know I most likely have asked berfore but you gotta remember my age:wink:)

I agree give it a couple days and if you don't have any restriction then call and go back and tell him you want more - that your tool is useless if it's not properly tuned...

Hugs

Janet