Feelin' down and frustrated need support, please
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So, I should be thankful and feel fabulous over the 77lb weight loss I have had these past 7 months, but I can only think and worry over the last 40lbs I have to lose. It is like I have to fight for every ounce that comes off my body these days and I am tired. I am physically and emotionally beat down. I am tired of spending 2-3 hours of my life everyday working out at the gym. And, it sucks that my friends can all go out for pizza and mexican and I can't "afford" the calories.
I am very goal oriented and very driven to lose this weight which I guess is a good thing, but I think I am becoming obessive about it. I want to lose 100% of my excess weight by my one year band anniversary in May. That is 5 months to lose 40lbs and I am scared that I won't make it. I feel like I am on a deadline because I guess I have lived so long without really living that I am anxious to start my life as a thin person.
Some of you may say to relax, give it time, and get a fill, but I don't want to get a fill. For me, the band itself has been my motivator and the fills have only been the last result. I have only had 2 fills in 7 months and I like knowing that the weight I am losing is because of my hard work and my healthy choices and not just because I am so tight I can't eat. I like being normal and being able to eat a normal portion of a variety of foods (there hasn't been anything I can't eat---I just don't because of calories). I have told very few people about my surgery and those that don't know don't suspect a thing and are so proud of me for losing the weight.
I guess I just needed a place to vent and some words of encouragement. If anyone has any plateau buster tips I would love to hear about them. It just seem that I am doing everything right and the weight is just not coming off. Instead I just fluctuate up and down
4-5lbs. Thanks for listening and congratulations on everyones weight loss successes (I guess I should include myself in this compliment, but it is hard to accept).
jfran