So I am 5 years and 2 months post-op RYGB. I made it beyond my goal weight of 170lb to 160lb. Technically I was as low as 145lbs because I was very sick in 2020 then again in 2022, but after getting better, I stabilized at a steady 160lb. Last July I started online streaming/socializing with people. I started snacking more because of nerves and also began drinking quite heavily because being silly tipsy in front of strangers is fun! I had NO IDEA how many calories was in alcohol. Over the course of 5 months, I gained 20lbs. Even more, I noticed that I can eat almost a "normal" plate of food the same size as my family's. I broke the rules and had started drinking fluids with my meals. I think I thought I could get away with breaking rules because I was at a stable 160lbs.

Now I am FREAKING out! I hate exercise. I never did it, even with my prior weightloss. I am using a tracking app my husband's VA dietician told him to use called Fat Secret. I am trying to stick to 1600 calories, which is super hard. I feel hungry all the time now. I think I caused pouch dilation. I refuse to be heavy again. My clothes are already getting tighter than I like.

I was doing research today on weight gain after years post-op. I basically am reading that I need a bariatric reset. I am going to do a 2-week "Pouch Reset Diet." It's not to make my pouch smaller, but it's to retrain my body to feel full with smaller portions again. I need to go back to the basics, and it's really hard.

I also don't get DS with sweets like I used to. Don't get me wrong, I still get sick, but I noticed that my sugar tolerances have changed. It really worries me. 40% of bypass patients fail and bounce back to within 10% of their original weight pre-surgery. I will NOT be a part of that 40%.

My support system at home is tricky. On one hand, my husband does support me outwardly. But he himself weighs 415lbs and isn't doing much about his weight. He watched my struggles and drustrations and outright refuses surgery for himself. He's on some stupid intermitent fasting diet, but he still eats way too large portions at meal times. My 15 y/o son is pushing 285lbs, and his only exercise is video games. For me, it's like living around all these food temptations is a struggle. It's like being an alcoholic and living at a bar.

I just ordered a crap ton of protein powder so I can jump start this Pouch Reset Diet. I started to push myself on working out at least a little bit. I have a mini stair stepper and an eleptical bike. Anything is better than nothing. I am just wondering if I am alone in my struggles?

Weight regain happens. You’re not the only one you had or will experience it. We get over confident or complacent & poor choices slip in. We go back to old behaviours of using food (or alcohol) to comfort us or sooth us in times of stress or emotional upsets.

It’s why what you need to do is reset your head not your tummy. Remember how we always said doing the head work is a very important aspect of our weight loss & maintenance. A pouch reset won’t reduce the size of your tummy (not that your’s would be stretched) nor do anything to get to the root of your eating & change your behaviours. Stretching your tummy is pretty difficult. It would take a concentrated to eat excessive portions multiple times a day for a prolonged length of time to do it.

You’ve made the first two steps already by acknowledging & recognising the what & why behind your regain & by starting to track your food again. Best advice then is to go back to how you were eating (food choices, portion sizes, eating behaviours, meeting protein & fluid goals) when you were nearing your stabilised weight.

Would you consider going back to your dietician to help you get back on track? Did you see a therapist when you had your surgery? Maybe get in contact again for the regain & also the drinking. We have to be careful with addiction transfer after surgery. It can be a slippery slope.

All the best. You got this.

Thanks for your really honest post. I can see this happening to me and others years after surgery - there are just so many pressures to eat and drink things that aren't good.

It sounds like you're ready for a change and to lose some of that regain if possible. I agree that there will be headwork as well as diet work to do. Arabesque's post is super sensible and I hope you can take all of that on board. I would just add, returning to the basics of protein first, veg second for a few weeks might let you see a loss again. Maybe set a time limit of 4 weeks adhering strictly to that and see how you progress?

I like a glass or two of wine at weekends but if you can cut out alcohol completely (empty calories) then do. If not, then minimise. Think about why you need to have a few drinks in order to socialise online and think about what joy that socialising brings to your life (Vs the joy of being at your ideal weight). When you start losing weight again hopefully this will reinforce your new choices.

When it comes to public posts like this, i think sometimes you need a reality check. i know its your life but when you are venting and crying for help but in the same paragraph talk about how you don't want to go to the gym, it feels like you don't want to take the extra step and put a little more work in. before getting my surgery i had to lose 28lbs and i ended up losing 60lbs because i was in the gym pushing myself. getting that sweat in. you gotta put you first you cant blame your husband or your kid. they also say that 70% of marriages don't last because of this surgery due to the significant other not wanting to make the changes as well. All you can do is hold yourself accountable. i wanted so bad to blame everyone around me for the weight i gained because all my friends eat so freely, and my family eats so freely, and then there's me just huge. but its me who ultimately who has to hold myself accountable. i cant cry about everyone around me. i have to make the changes necessary because its me who wants to see the changes. don't do a pouch reset. Go back to your eating when you were in your first year. think about your potions. this is what my nutritionist said " Pouch resets aren't real they are just a way for Bari patients to think they are starting over" go for walks. you don't need the gym. but getting active and making sure you are burning off some of the calories you are consuming is really what you wanna do. YOU GOT THIS. you made it this far now that you are here you just have to do maintenance.?

On 2/29/2024 at 10:20 PM, Faery215 said:

Even more, I noticed that I can eat almost a "normal" plate of food the same size as my family's

Not that uncommon. I can eat a pretty "normal" amount of food as well, depending on what time of day it is, activity level and what kind of food. Take a look at Dr. Weiner's video on increasing portion sizes:

Interesting chart about 1:30 min in.

I wish surgeons would educate their patients on this and telling them that it's normal and nothing to be scared about ("my surgery failed" - no it most likely didn't).

3 hours ago, summerset said:

I wish surgeons would educate their patients on this and telling them that it's normal and nothing to be scared about ("my surgery failed" - no it most likely didn't).

This video should be required viewing for every bariatric patient. I have watched every one of Dr. Weiner's videos and rewatch them regularly. So much important information that you don't learn in most programs.

Thank you so much for sharing this video summerset! I am pre-op and it was extremely helpful to see