in the past two days ive been really doubting that i want surgery on monday first of all i just moved on sunday and i am trying to adjust and my surgery is the monday before thanksgiving. i just feel overwhelmed with everything. my husband just started a new job on monday and money is tight right now and he wont be able to get time off to take me to the hospital so i will have to do this by myself. i cant tell if this is normal to feel this way right before surgery. i have so much other stuff going on that i am so overwhelmed. i have been eating really bad in the past month also. i didnt have to do a preop diet and i dont have to do a post op diet i am on soft proteins one day after surgery. i hope that i can do this.

andrea

My husband is paralyzed and bed bound, I had to do everything myself. I still had to feed him too. You will be tired and sore for a few ays, but it will pass. I am glad I did this around the holidays, no more 10 pound weight gain!!!

I just went to a dinner that my surgeon had for his patients. I was only 2 weeks out from surgery, so I had only a couple spoonfuls...no meat either. He said something that might help...if the family gives you grief about what you are eating, or not eating, tell them that you are here for the company, not the food. That sounds like a wonderful answer. Make the holiday about the family, the people, not the food.

Oh, and I hired a driver to take me to the hospital and pick me up. It worked out great.

Like Pattypoo said you can make this work if you want/need to. But I can totally understand if you decide to postpone it a couple weeks. You will probably never find a "good" time to have the surgery but it sounds like you have a lot on your plate right now. More than normal that is. Would it be possible to just postpone it a few days? The best would actually be the Friday right after Thanksgiving, or possibly the following Friday. That would give you both a little more time to settle into your new home and job. And a Friday surgery would give your husband the weekend to help care for you. The surgery hits everyone different and I'm a bit of a stubborn old bird but for me I was well enough to have been back to work in just a couple days. But I really appreciated having the help at home that first day or two.

I'm going to be honest with you: I think you're looking for a way out.

All these "reasons" you are giving for NOT having surgery done are day-to-day occurrences--and there is NEVER going to be just the perfect time for your surgery.

This is and has been your decision to make--you need to face yourself honestly and judge whether you truly want this surgery now or if you really want to continue your life as it is right now. That's all you have to do...

Make33 there is always someone who says what others might be thinking. I was thinking that same thing.

And you know it's okay if you aren't ready. Really. You have to decide what is right for YOU. I think you should remember you researched looked listened and then went on to decide it was the right thing for you. GREAT.

Timing is a hard time for me to peg. I can tell you this...my surgery date, April 17th, is the anniversary of the death of my father. That was just a sign from heaven for me. I had enough of being fat, scared to gain even an ounce more too!

Recovery is not that bad at all. You CAN walk to the car. You will need someone to drive you because of the anesthesia. Otherwise I could have driven myself back to my hotel.

Make yourself a priority!

I don't want this thread turning into an argument between me and others over whether you should delay the surgery or not. I'm sure you appreciate the comments on both sides of the point however, ultimately the decision is yours alone and not our place to judge. I'm sure everyone of us will be behind you 100% on your band journey wether it begins on our timetable or yours.

Personally, I delayed mine by a week or two as well. I had delayed mine from the beginning. The doctor had been willing to do it in August but I had some work and home obligations I really didn't feel I could neglect during the recovery. I was also tempted to postpone it further as I have 6 family B-Days from Sep 25th through Oct 9th. including my & my toddler son's b-day's. Then there was T-day, Chistmas, etc. If I had allowed myself I could have easily found reasons to wait forever. I'm glad I didn't postpone the surgery even longer.

Afterwards I found that I was back up and running in under a week not the 2-4 weeks the doctor was telling me. But I still have NO, I repeat NO regrets waiting those extra few weeks to get past the other obligations I had first.

My point. In 2 years time I doubt you are going to give a flying fig wether you had the surgery in November or December, probably even January. Only you can decide if you can handle juggling todays issues and your recovery. So please don't take anything we say out here too seriously.

The only regret I have over my surgery date is really too silly to even take seriously. That is that it was so close to my birthdate that I'm having a hard time convincing my husband or family members to treat my "bandversary" as a new holiday that deserves its own celebration (and gifts ofcourse!).

... it's okay if you aren't ready. Really. You have to decide what is right for YOU. I think you should remember you researched looked listened and then went on to decide it was the right thing for you. GREAT.

Timing is a hard time for me to peg. I can tell you this...my surgery date, April 17th, is the anniversary of the death of my father. That was just a sign from heaven for me. I had enough of being fat, scared to gain even an ounce more too!

Recovery is not that bad at all. You CAN walk to the car. You will need someone to drive you because of the anesthesia. Otherwise I could have driven myself back to my hotel.

Make yourself a priority!

Great Post Lap_dancer

bandversery I love it!

I just wanted to give you a pat on the back for all the 92 lbs you've lost since 2005. You have to be very proud of yourself.

Patty, I am amazed to see how fast everyone is loosing weight! You were banded Nov 1st and you're down 50 lbs already! This is a miracle. You must be feeling awesome! I don't know what it's like to feel to be 50 lbs lighter, I can't wait.

My surgery is scheduled for 12/12/07. I have been having serious doubts also & I dont have any of the stressors that you described. Know you are not alone in your confusion.

some days i think that i am looking for a way out. i have doubts that i even want the surgery. somtimes i think that i dont want to give up the food or overeating at times. sometimes i even feel ok about my weight. lately ive been all over the place mostly the sooner i get to surgery. but i know that ive been in the program for one year now and have been wanting this for awhile now. i think that most of my doubts are normal because of the surgery coming up. ive always been one for going back and forth on things but like my friend told me that ive been in the program for one year and ive been working for this moment and not to give up right before surgery. its weird though because for so long i wanted this and right now i feel doubtful.

andrea

Andrea, I know what you mean. Every since they called & scheduled my surgery on Nov 1st. I have really been questioning whether I should do this. It doesnt feel like fear but maybe it is. You are not alone.

You are both very normal in your fears. Either that or I'm just as wierd But the very day of the surgery I was talking to my DH on the way to the hospital about wether or not to postpone the surgery since the pre-surgery diet was going so well. I was trying to rationalize that maybe as long as this "new" diet was working I'd just keep postponing it over and over.

But then I remembered something someone else here on LBT said. "The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over, while expecting different results."

I know you two will make it. I will keep you in my thoughts, and look forward to watching your progress.

I think some apprehension is normal. I mean, you are having surgery, after all. I know that I wasn't sure, even as I went in! I had really considered postponing. I wasn't sure I wanted to deal with the food restrictions during the holidays, my toddler's 2nd birthday is on Wednesday and he never had a 1st birthday party because I was too sick after my heart attack, etc., etc. But my DH really encouraged me to go while I had momentum. It came up fast, and I'm only three days out, but now I'm glad it's over with!

That being said, you do have a lot going on and I don't think there'd be anything wrong with your pushing it out a couple of weeks. I would think that your recovery would go better if you were more relaxed going into it.

Just my two cents.