Hey everyone,

I’m 8 days post op and am physically feeling good but am overwhelmed with emotions and cry at the drop of a hat. Everything seems overwhelming and it’s like I’m having existential crisis. I have faith it’ll get better, but right now it seems My life is flashing before my eyes. Moments that got to me this point, the way feeling ugly/unacceptable has impacted me, the way society believes your worth goes by your size etc. it’s heartbreaking how people view big people, being seen as “less than” my whole life.

it was a blessing of a requirement having to go to counseling prior to the surgery to talk these things out, but actually being in the storm and going through it has been a lot. I know having to sit around healing and being in pain, barely eating etc messed with me a little, so I just wanted to rant and get these feelings out of my head and maybe talk with some of you have experienced these feelings.

Much love y’all :)

Hi KatieNthings, I’m so sorry that you are feeling sad, I’m pretty new as well, I had surgery just a little under 3 months and it’s kinda normal to feel emotional and sad early on, you just had major surgery and a lifestyle change so of course emotions will be all over the place which seems to be pretty normal right after surgery but it really does get so much better, once you start losing weight and noticing all of the positive changes physically and mentally you will start to feel that what you are going through now was so worth it.

Unfortunately we cannot change what society thinks, confidence and happiness is up to us. People will always disappoint us but once you start feeling good about yourself and build up confidence, your whole life will start to change for the better you will exude in happiness and confidence. Once you’re comfortable with you others will be also.

You can’t change other people you can only change yourself.

Hang in there honey it only gets better from here.

Chin up, you got this! And this whole community is here for you ?

Thank you Wanda247 ?❤️ congrats on your journey!

Anesthesia can also do a number on your body and emotions. It take about 30 days for the complete side affects of it to wear off.


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Hmmn, never heard this before but it does make sense. May be the last shreds in me are due to repeated endoscopies biweekly with their attendant sedation/anesthesia. Never get it totally out of my system, puts a ☁⚡☔over your best efforts.???

I am almost three weeks post surgery and everything you are feeling is normal. My surgeon told me that in addition to the large life changes and the physical pain from surgery/healing, our bodies are also going through a hormonal "reset." This makes things even crazier as far as emotions.

Truth be told though his explanation has done little to help me with the day to day struggles of trying to adjust to this new life. I have started counseling in an attempt to get myself under control. I cry during family meals, I have stopped going out to do anything with friends/family because everyone inevitably wants to stop for a drink or a bite to eat (and I have not yet conquered the joy of sipping a glass of water while others have pop/lemonade/wine), and I can't even imagine what Thanksgiving would be like so I have decided that I am sending my husband and kids to celebrate with family and I will stay home alone this year. My mind is my own worse enemy and the fact I am stuck in an eleven day stall has just made matters worse. I feel like I have done all of this for nothing and now I'm afraid to go anywhere because now I'm "that" fat girl....I even had surgery and I still can't lose weight. I know counseling is my last chance before my primary doctor puts me on meds for depression/anxiety and between vitamins and surgery related meds, I have enough pills to juggle already.

Fortunately this forum has been a huge help because I can always log on here and know I'm not alone and that this will eventually pass. I just have to take everything one day at a time.

Yes but let this resourceful granny make a suggestion? Carry Chrystal lite packets or Mio liquid with you, stir a little into ice water and presto chango, You are back in the "loop" of Life. You will benefit from scenery changes more then PLOM moments. PLOM stands for Poor Little Old Me( with thanks to Mrs Ganges in Red Deer Alberta). Too easy to throw yourself a pity party and sometimes you are the only one willing to attend. Be I g a hermit is NOT part of the Program!??

10 hours ago, wanda247 said:

Hi KatieNthings, I’m so sorry that you are feeling sad, I’m pretty new as well, I had surgery just a little under 3 months and it’s kinda normal to feel emotional and sad early on, you just had major surgery and a lifestyle change so of course emotions will be all over the place which seems to be pretty normal right after surgery but it really does get so much better, once you start losing weight and noticing all of the positive changes physically and mentally you will start to feel that what you are going through now was so worth it.

Unfortunately we cannot change what society thinks, confidence and happiness is up to us. People will always disappoint us but once you start feeling good about yourself and build up confidence, your whole life will start to change for the better you will exude in happiness and confidence. Once you’re comfortable with you others will be also.

You can’t change other people you can only change yourself.

Hang in there honey it only gets better from here.

Chin up, you got this! And this whole community is here for you ?

Wanda I couldn’t have said that better.

Kate, chin up and think of all the positive things that will come out of this. I’m only a month post op and I could see a change. Not in actually weight loss, but inches. I could actually get on floor and play with my grandchildren and that was one of my goals. You can do this!! And like Wanda said, we are all here for you if you need us!!! Sending hugs!!

Overweight people are invisible. Society tends to ignore them. I noticed several months after surgery I became visible again to society. But I still remember how it felt to be invisible for decades.

So I adopted a very simple routine. Whenever I am in a store or restaurant and people wear name tags. I note their names. And as I am paying I call them by name. "Jane, how are you today. George, have a good day." Generally their reaction is quite remarkable. They look up. They stopped being invisible for a few seconds and fell appreciated.

On another side note: As you lose weight, the chemicals and hormones that were stored in your fat cells are being released into your body. These will pass through your kidneys and are expelled in your urine or through your sweat. But they can generate a flush of hormones during the weight loss phase. They should simmer down once you transition into maintenance. It is important to meet your daily fluid requirements, because it take fluids to flush these hormones from your system.

Katie, so sorry you're struggling right now. One thing to know is that our bodies store estrogen in fat cells and as the fat is released, so is the estrogen. It creates the emotional rollercoaster. Come on to the site and vent. We're happy to support you because we know your pain.

If there are support groups in your area, try them out. I find them to be very beneficial. Good luck.

I second the notion that you could very well be suffering after effects of anesthesia.
Some folks call fall into an intense emotional state a few days after general anesthesia, a sort of temporary depression. Even if they have never suffered from depression before. It can last a few days, a week or even a month.
I watched my Mom go through this and was so happy to get the information from a medical professional within the first several days.
Additionally, your body has gone through trauma. That alone could cause some hormone wonkiness/emotional imbalance for a little while.
Just keep reminding yourself it’s a temporary situation. It seems simple. I know it’s not. But, it will help.