What would you say to someone who is trying to make the very difficult step to call a doctor?

I've been a lurker on this board for a while now and after some heavy researching on my own, I believe I am ready to meet with a doctor... but making that step is SO hard. Did anyone else experience this? I feel so ashamed and embarrassed and I know when I do meet with a doctor it'll be a teary therapy session of flowing feelings.

I hope that makes sense... I suppose I'm just easily embarrassed and nervous to go and admit that I need help.

Any help/experience/advice would be appreciated, thank you!

Sarah

The doctor I used requires everyone to go to a lap-band seminar first. I know all doctors are different, but maybe going to a seminar first (if you haven't already) would help your transition into this process. I got a lot of great info and it helped me feel more confident and comfortable talking to the doc about the procedure. Good Luck!

I understand how you feel. Have you researched doctors? Remember bariatric surgeons are completely used to the emotions that go along with this type of surgery. Try and find a doctor who fits with your personality - for example I don't go for the touchy feely type but some people need that. Also, remember that just because you have a consultation doesn't mean that you are going to get a surgery date right away. For me, it took me so long (in my mind) to get the consulation that I was raring to go and had the surgery about 3 weeks later.

I would just tell you that this has been one of the very best things I've ever done for myself. Once I found Lapband as an option and one that I could use for the rest of my life, I was sold. I researched until I felt I learned everything I possibly could and I made the phone call to attend a seminar.

Was it easy? No, it wasn't. I was scared and I felt like a failure. Maybe my issues are different than yours....I don't know. But I knew that I would be dealing with, "why are *you* doing this?" or "*You* don't have that much to lose.", or "it's stupid to have surgery; just go on a diet and get some exercise.", etc. Well, I wanted the help. I needed the help. I want to be healthy. I didn't want to be as fat as I was and I didn't want to get any fatter. With my family history, I knew that gaining more and more weight was more than just a possibility.

When I was heavier, I was depressed. If I didn't get out, it was fine. If I didn't see friends for awhile, it was fine. If I sat home and ate Cheetos and Oreos all day (or three days), it was fine. Well, it's not fine!

Now, I'm 33 pounds lighter, I'm eating healthy, I'm working out, I'm enjoying life. And it's only going to continue to get better. When I binge eat, it's on 3 packs of 100 calorie Snacks. I don't undo all the great work that I've accomplished. if I hit a plateau, I'm not gaining; I'm staying stable. I eat like a thin person. I still enjoy food; just not an over-abundance of it.

Maybe not the answer you were looking for, but I'll just say that it's working beautifully for me. Life is good. I love my band.

I wish you the absolute best of luck.

Taking that step was very easy for me. Scheduling the surgery was difficult and I teared up. Just think of it as additional research. You don't have to schedule surgery that day. Just get info and see if you like the Doctor and his staff. That is also very important as you will be dealing with them a lot after surgery.

Good luck!

Just call. You aren't comitted to a thing at that point.

When I called, I was still undecided. Or so I told myself. But here's how I saw the situation:

If I call now, I can begin the paperwork. I'm not committed to this if I decide not to go through with it.

If I don't call now, I cannot begin the paperwork. If I then decide I DO want to go through with this, then there's all the extra time of having to get the paperwork/preliminary stuff out of the way.

Which would I rather have? The prelim stuff out of the way so I can act that much sooner, or to have to start from scratch once I've made up my mind and am eager to get started?

That made it really easy for me.

I would just tell you that this has been one of the very best things I've ever done for myself. Once I found Lapband as an option and one that I could use for the rest of my life, I was sold. I researched until I felt I learned everything I possibly could and I made the phone call to attend a seminar.

Was it easy? No, it wasn't. I was scared and I felt like a failure. Maybe my issues are different than yours....I don't know. But I knew that I would be dealing with, "why are *you* doing this?" or "*You* don't have that much to lose.", or "it's stupid to have surgery; just go on a diet and get some exercise.", etc. Well, I wanted the help. I needed the help. I want to be healthy. I didn't want to be as fat as I was and I didn't want to get any fatter. With my family history, I knew that gaining more and more weight was more than just a possibility.

When I was heavier, I was depressed. If I didn't get out, it was fine. If I didn't see friends for awhile, it was fine. If I sat home and ate Cheetos and Oreos all day (or three days), it was fine. Well, it's not fine!

Now, I'm 33 pounds lighter, I'm eating healthy, I'm working out, I'm enjoying life. And it's only going to continue to get better. When I binge eat, it's on 3 packs of 100 calorie Snacks. I don't undo all the great work that I've accomplished. if I hit a plateau, I'm not gaining; I'm staying stable. I eat like a thin person. I still enjoy food; just not an over-abundance of it.

Maybe not the answer you were looking for, but I'll just say that it's working beautifully for me. Life is good. I love my band.

I wish you the absolute best of luck.

I have to agree with everything you said. I knew going into this whole process that I would face criticism from people. From thin people that thought surgery was the easy way out, from people heavier than me that thought that I shouldn't have surgery because I wasn't as big as they were, from my own family because they were scared for me. I was sick of being fat, not being able to do the things I wanted to do, etc. But I also felt a little ashamed that I had to go to these lengths to lose weight. I would just tell them that it is something that we all feel, and that it's not anything to be ashamed of. Yes, you'll probably run into nay-sayers, but you are doing this for yourself and for your health and future.

Just do it! We've all been in your shoes. Go to a seminar first, get the information from the Dr. Listen to everything at the seminar, listen to the questions that are asked by others at the seminar. It will help you make up your mind. Once you do that you have made your commitment to becoming healthy.

Learn all that you can. Good luck and keep us posted!

I would say, "What are you waiting for?"

Seriously!! Just do it.

aren't I profound:D

Look, if someone looks at me sideways I burst into tears! I cry at At&T print ads for crying out loud! You think you're the only one (this is me doing tough love). Just kidding.

Everyone on this board can relate to what you are saying. I am pre-op, finished all my testing and have the surgeon consult on Dec. 27th. When I think about meeting her, I want to vomit. When I set the date, I will cry and have diarreah.

But even if I wake up the morning of surgery and don't want to move forward, I don't have to. I am in control of what happens, just as you are.

I can totally relate to the embarassment etc. But interestingly enough, when I was in the docs office doing the day long testing (as were others), there was tremendous camradarie since we were all in the same boat.

My advice; find a baraitric surgeon who does lapband, research to make sure they are on your insurance, call your insurance to make sure they cover lap (if you are not self-pay). If all is well, call the doctors office and just tell them you are seriously interested and how do you move forward.

I wish you all the best,

Marieze

Honey, I remeber balling my eyes out when I went to the doctor...and guess what.....THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH IT.....Believe me ....you will fill much better when you get out of the office.Making the decision is the first step to success.For me 1.5 years after the surgery it is the BEST thing I have done for myself

Are you talking about meeting with a GP type doctor, or a bariatric doctor? You know you can go right to the bariatric doctor. The LAST thing any of them will do is JUDGE you! I didnt go to my GP and I am glad I didn't. First of all she was nowhere near knowledgeable about the lapband AT ALL. I had made up my mind, (insurance or no) and I did NOT need someone who could possibly try to "talk me out of it". Do your research on the doctors in your area and go directly to one of them. Just my two cents.

"I knew going into this whole process that I would face criticism from people."

My answer to being afraid of what "other people will say" is to cowboy up and screw em. It's your life and your body and NO ONE has any right to dictate what you do with it.