So I don’t really know exactly how to put this into how I’m feeling but I’m increasingly down in the dumps at 1 week post op RNY. I did all the research and felt prepared but now I see myself being very worried about complications and that my entire life is going to just suck from now on. I’m not worried about the food aspect of it. I’m more afraid of the what if’s that may happen down the road. I’m 21 and I am just now beginning life. I’m worried about if I will ever be able to have kids and if I will have a normal life with this procedure having been done. Don’t get me wrong I am extremely thankful to have had it, but I also hate how I feel right now. It’s mostly feelings of isolation because I haven’t been able to do anything or go anywhere since surgery. Hopefully things get better because I’m seriously struggling right now.

First off, congrats on your surgery and hope you are healing well.

A certain amount of depression/buyer's remorse is very common with life-changing events, and a bypass certainly qualifies. It might help to know how many of us wish we had had surgery earlier in our lives.

You should certainly be able to have children. In fact, after weight loss you should have less trouble conceiving than an obese woman at the same age. You are less likely to have issues with gestational diabetes and your baby is more likely to be born at a normal weight. By the time you reach maintenance, you will be able to consume sufficient calories to support a healthy pregnancy. And when your toddler runs, you can run, too!

The first month is hard, no two ways about it. But in the grand scheme of your life, this will just be a challenging chapter. The one right before all the good stuff starts! Best wishes!

Hey girl, I understand being down but really, I think you're going to be SO happy about this decision. You're so young and when you lose that weight it will be faster than others and your skin will have so much more elasticity. Girl, you've already lost almost 30 lbs.!!! Amazing! I totally wish I would have had this surgery earlier. I'll have to let some veterans respond but I'm pretty sure I've read somewhere about a hormone flush after surgery where they can get a little out of whack? You're on to something though about the isolation feelings. I felt a little bit of that too during recovery but know that this is your very special time all to yourself to heal. Start walking outdoors and get some fresh air. Then, get comfy and watch some Netflix. May I recommend, "Money Heist"? So good. I binge watched and finished it in like 2 days. LOL Every day is going to get better. You're going to be able to eat and drink like everyone else (just much more less) down the road and you'll be so skinny! You've got friends on here. Everyone is so supportive.

On 07/10/2018 at 11:29, Orchids&Dragons said:

First off, congrats on your surgery and hope you are healing well.

A certain amount of depression/buyer's remorse is very common with life-changing events, and a bypass certainly qualifies. It might help to know how many of us wish we had had surgery earlier in our lives.

You should certainly be able to have children. In fact, after weight loss you should have less trouble conceiving than an obese woman at the same age. You are less likely to have issues with gestational diabetes and your baby is more likely to be born at a normal weight. By the time you reach maintenance, you will be able to consume sufficient calories to support a healthy pregnancy. And when your toddler runs, you can run, too!

The first month is hard, no two ways about it. But in the grand scheme of your life, this will just be a challenging chapter. The one right before all the good stuff starts! Best wishes!

Thank you so much for this advice.. I am feeling much better now physically speaking but mentally I’m just not there. I’ve pretty much cried every day. My main issue is I’m the only one Out if everyone who has had wls that I know that’s had RNY so it’s hard to have a peer to talk to about it all. I’m hoping it gets better. Maybe once I start soft foods I’ll feel like a person again..

On 07/10/2018 at 12:04, Little Kansas Kitty said:

Hey girl, I understand being down but really, I think you're going to be SO happy about this decision. You're so young and when you lose that weight it will be faster than others and your skin will have so much more elasticity. Girl, you've already lost almost 30 lbs.!!! Amazing! I totally wish I would have had this surgery earlier. I'll have to let some veterans respond but I'm pretty sure I've read somewhere about a hormone flush after surgery where they can get a little out of whack? You're on to something though about the isolation feelings. I felt a little bit of that too during recovery but know that this is your very special time all to yourself to heal. Start walking outdoors and get some fresh air. Then, get comfy and watch some Netflix. May I recommend, "Money Heist"? So good. I binge watched and finished it in like 2 days. LOL Every day is going to get better. You're going to be able to eat and drink like everyone else (just much more less) down the road and you'll be so skinny! You've got friends on here. Everyone is so supportive.

Thank you for the advice as well. I’ve been binge watching Jane the Virgin lol. I just feel cruddy because I haven’t gotten to spend any time around anyone and I can’t go with my boyfriend to his jobs like I did before due to rough roads hurt still. He gets home super late and I live 40 minutes from everyone else so it’s been a challenge with the loneliness. Not to mention sleeping in my recliner instead of in bed just makes me feel more isolated from him. I’m so ready to feel better about everything.

2 minutes ago, mckenzie said:

Thank you so much for this advice.. I am feeling much better now physically speaking but mentally I’m just not there. I’ve pretty much cried every day. My main issue is I’m the only one Out if everyone who has had wls that I know that’s had RNY so it’s hard to have a peer to talk to about it all. I’m hoping it gets better. Maybe once I start soft foods I’ll feel like a person again..

Just keep talking to folks here. They definitely get you. It does get better!

On 07/10/2018 at 12:33, Orchids&Dragons said:

Just keep talking to folks here. They definitely get you. It does get better!

Thank you! I’m just trying my best to get out of this funk

2 hours ago, mckenzie said:

So I don’t really know exactly how to put this into how I’m feeling but I’m increasingly down in the dumps at 1 week post op RNY. I did all the research and felt prepared but now I see myself being very worried about complications and that my entire life is going to just suck from now on. I’m not worried about the food aspect of it. I’m more afraid of the what if’s that may happen down the road. I’m 21 and I am just now beginning life. I’m worried about if I will ever be able to have kids and if I will have a normal life with this procedure having been done. Don’t get me wrong I am extremely thankful to have had it, but I also hate how I feel right now. It’s mostly feelings of isolation because I haven’t been able to do anything or go anywhere since surgery. Hopefully things get better because I’m seriously struggling right now.

These funks are completely normal and part of the process. Lean on us! We will be there for you and we understand. I promise, it does get better.

On 07/10/2018 at 12:50, AshAsh1 said:

These funks are completely normal and part of the process. Lean on us! We will be there for you and we understand. I promise, it does get better.

Thank you. It’s just weird going 2 weeks not being able to “eat” anything but liquids. It’s made me worry I’ll never be able to enjoy meals again I guess. I’m not worried about changing eating practices I’m just worried I’ll forever be extremely limited with my options.

2 hours ago, mckenzie said:

So I don’t really know exactly how to put this into how I’m feeling but I’m increasingly down in the dumps at 1 week post op RNY. I did all the research and felt prepared but now I see myself being very worried about complications and that my entire life is going to just suck from now on. I’m not worried about the food aspect of it. I’m more afraid of the what if’s that may happen down the road. I’m 21 and I am just now beginning life. I’m worried about if I will ever be able to have kids and if I will have a normal life with this procedure having been done. Don’t get me wrong I am extremely thankful to have had it, but I also hate how I feel right now. It’s mostly feelings of isolation because I haven’t been able to do anything or go anywhere since surgery. Hopefully things get better because I’m seriously struggling right now.

This is normal. Totally normal and expected. I was there for a bit as well. Second guessing myself and my choice to go with something so life changingly permanent. But you know what. Now, I wish I had done it back in 2011 rather than get the band. I'm so damn happy with things now, frustrated here and there with delays and stalls, but overall... I couldn't be happier with my decision!

Stay Strong... it ***DOES*** get better!

2 minutes ago, mckenzie said:

Thank you. It’s just weird going 2 weeks not being able to “eat” anything but liquids. It’s made me worry I’ll never be able to enjoy meals again I guess. I’m not worried about changing eating practices I’m just worried I’ll forever be extremely limited with my options.

It does seem like that at first, but you will feel normal again. You will eat fairly normal again. In fact, I wish I had some of my sensitivities back, it would keep me from being tempted to eat bad things. The pre op diet and food progression stages after surgery are the hardest parts. I felt so much better when I got to soft foods.

31 minutes ago, mckenzie said:

Thank you for the advice as well. I’ve been binge watching Jane the Virgin lol. I just feel cruddy because I haven’t gotten to spend any time around anyone and I can’t go with my boyfriend to his jobs like I did before due to rough roads hurt still. He gets home super late and I live 40 minutes from everyone else so it’s been a challenge with the loneliness. Not to mention sleeping in my recliner instead of in bed just makes me feel more isolated from him. I’m so ready to feel better about everything.

I'll have to check out "Jane the Virgin". Just googled it and sounds like a lot of funny drama.

I'm sure the recliner is comfier but I purchased a pregnancy pillow which I LOVE! I let my daughter sleep with me a couple nights to have a slumber party but mostly I just was looking forward to the company. Maybe, graduate to lots of pillows so you can snuggle again?

Just remember, that every day gets a wee bit better. Tomorrow you'll feel better than today. Before you know it you'll have forgotten what this first month felt like.

Edited July 10, 20188 yr by Little Kansas Kitty

On 07/10/2018 at 12:56, Matt Z said:

This is normal. Totally normal and expected. I was there for a bit as well. Second guessing myself and my choice to go with something so life changingly permanent. But you know what. Now, I wish I had done it back in 2011 rather than get the band. I'm so damn happy with things now, frustrated here and there with delays and stalls, but overall... I couldn't be happier with my decision!



Stay Strong... it ***DOES*** get better!

I’m so thankful for all of the replies people put on here because it just makes me feel better about my decision. Thank you so much !

On 07/10/2018 at 12:58, AshAsh1 said:

It does seem like that at first, but you will feel normal again. You will eat fairly normal again. In fact, I wish I had some of my sensitivities back, it would keep me from being tempted to eat bad things. The pre op diet and food progression stages after surgery are the hardest parts. I felt so much better when I got to soft foods.

Yeah that is what I’m hoping for. It’s very strange to be okay on only liquids. In my head I’m like “ why am I not hungry? “. I don’t physically feel it but mentally I think I need to eat.

On 07/10/2018 at 13:00, Little Kansas Kitty said:

I'll have to check out "Jane the Virgin". Just googled it and sounds like a lot of funny drama.

I'm sure the recliner is comfier but I purchased a pregnancy pillow which I LOVE! I let my daughter sleep with me a couple nights to have a slumber party but mostly I just was looking forward to the company. Maybe, graduate to lots of pillows so you can snuggle again?

Just remember, that every day gets a wee bit better. Tomorrow you'll feel better than today. Before you know it you'll have forgotten what this first month felt like.

I hope it’ll get better once I get my drain tube removed. I have to keep it for 2 weeks and I really think that’s contributing to the issue sleeping in bed.

5 minutes ago, mckenzie said:

Yeah that is what I’m hoping for. It’s very strange to be okay on only liquids. In my head I’m like “ why am I not hungry? “. I don’t physically feel it but mentally I think I need to eat.

Its great that your hunger has subsided. Enjoy that for as long as it lasts! I like to call what you describe as "head hunger", but hopefully its easily fightable. I actually missed the act of chewing. I bought a bag of Sonic ice and chewed on that for comfort.