So, here's a topic I know may anger some, but is there anyone else who can't stand when someone just assumes you're religious and offers to pray for you? As an atheist, I never presume to guess what anyone else's beliefs are and I don't go around telling random people there is no god, especially in a time of turmoil or crisis. So when I tell someone I'm having surgery, or about any other significant event, whether in person or online, how about a little common courtesy and not just assuming I believe as you do and leaving your religion out of it?

I'm not looking to debate the existence of god here, I'm just trying to get people to realize that other people believe differently than they do and to not make assumptions.

1 minute ago, Creekimp13 said:

I keep hoping everyone stops posting...and then I post again...cause, lets face it....I need all Bariatric Store Rewards Points I can get for my next order of Protien Mighty Muffins. LOLOLOLOLOL....

if there was a cry face emoji... you would get one!

4 minutes ago, AshAsh1 said:

I hope I don't come across this way from my post....

You didn't. Even if you did, Ash, I wouldn't hold it against ya. Hell, i don't hold it against Jess, I just thought it was funny and felt a bit Puckish.

Nom. Nom. Nom!

11 minutes ago, Creekimp13 said:

Nom. Nom. Nom!

That is a real cry face, not a laughing- cry face one though! I should have clarified!

On 06/20/2018 at 10:16, Creekimp13 said:

The intention does not dictate the receipt. I think it's extremely important to consider the receipt...if your intention is truly comforting someone else.

Often times I experience people's prayers as them comforting themselves. That seems a crappy thing to do at the expense of my personal trauma.

I would much prefer "You're in my thoughts", "I care", "i'm here for you"...because these things mean something to me and I experience them as support.

You’re right that it does not dictate the receipt.

The one thing I never really understood about militant atheists is their intense and belligerent conviction in their own disbelief. Don’t believe? Cool. I’d think any mention of religion would be boring - almost to the point where it didn’t even move an atheist to respond. What’s the point of debating something you don’t believe in?

I could see arguing about the separation of Church and state (for the Americans), as that may directly impact you. However, I’m always surprised that any religious pandering doesn’t fall on deaf ears when delivered to nonbelievers.

It's an extremely blind and foolish assumption to think that my deeply held beliefs are not as important and precious to me as they are to religious folks.

My belief system matters, too.

Your rights end where mine begin...my rights end where yours begin.

When you are announcing your unwanted prayers directed at me and use my difficult time as a platform for your beliefs....you are crossing a line.

If I used your misfortune as an opportunity to showcase my Atheism... to "comfort you" by prattling on about how MY beliefs affect YOUR life......you probably wouldn't like it. You'd probably think it was clueless, tone deaf, insensitive and really crappy behavior.

The bottom line...is that when someone is hurting is NOT the time to be selfish and push an agenda...no matter how much you believe you're in the right.

When someone is hurting...you respond to them in a way that comforts THEM. Not you.

There's absolutely nothing wrong with asking...... would you like me to pray for you?

Your friend might say...prayers are not my thing, but I appreciate your concern...thanks. Or they might have some other request. Or maybe they WILL want your prayers and appreciate them. Make inquiries, not assumptions. It's nice to show you care what they prefer...it's a way to get to know them better and show support they can actually feel. That matters.

Edited June 20, 20188 yr by Creekimp13

On 06/20/2018 at 18:27, Creekimp13 said:

It's an extremely blind and foolish assumption to think that my deeply held beliefs are not as important and precious to me as they are to religious folks.

My belief system matters, too.

Your rights end where mine begin...my rights end where yours begin.

When you are announcing your unwanted prayers directed at me and use my difficult time as a platform for your beliefs....you are crossing a line.

If I used your misfortune as an opportunity to showcase my Atheism... to "comfort you" by prattling on about how MY beliefs affect YOUR life......you probably wouldn't like it. You'd probably think it was clueless, tone deaf, insensitive and really crappy behavior.

The bottom line...is that when someone is hurting is NOT the time to be selfish and push an agenda...no matter how much you believe you're in the right.

When someone is hurting...you respond to them in a way that comforts THEM. Not you.

There's absolutely nothing wrong with asking...... would you like me to pray for you?

Your friend might say...prayers are not my thing, but I appreciate your concern...thanks. Or they might have some other request. Or maybe they WILL want your prayers and appreciate them. Make inquiries, not assumptions. It's nice to show you care what they prefer...it's a way to get to know them better and show support they can actually feel. That matters.

But how is a disbelief a belief system? Isn’t Atheism essentially not believing in a higher power?

How is wishing someone well pushing a belief system or using their pain as a platform for religious conversion?

I work with a fellow from Iran. He greets me and says Noruz Mubarak once a year. By your assertion this is rude or impolite, but by mine I find it nice that he wishes to share his joy in a holiday he celebrates with me.

I don't believe in God or Gods. Or fairies. Or UFOs. That DOES NOT MEAN I DON'T HAVE A BELIEF SYSTEM that is precious and important to me. To suggest my belief system doesn't matter because I don't share your obsession with the supernatural is frankly... incredibly short sighted, self important and insulting.

My belief in science, reason, the quantifiable, in what can be proven with empirical evidence.... is something I take enormous comfort in. Having the courage to tell the truth about what can and cannot be known is hugely important to how I live my life, how I metabolize difficult times, how I survive hardship and live a happy fulfilling life.

Supernatural antiquated beliefs do not comfort me.

You're asserting that a guy saying..."Happy Holidays" in passing is the same as going to someone in crisis and inflicting your beliefs on them. It's not remotely the same.

If prayers are not wanted by the person in crisis, don't announce them! If you don't know...asking is a great way to help. "would you like me to pray for you?" is a pretty easy thing to ask.

Failing to do so would be like me showing up to your mother's funeral and saying...let me comfort you with my beliefs by saying that even though we know this heaven nonsense is a load of rubbish, and she's gone for good now.....she lead an impacting life that is a terrific legacy!

I might feel strongly convicted and I might BELIEVE this in my bones....but to say so in a time of crisis when I know it goes against YOUR beliefs is rude as hell.

it's different. Pay attention.

When people are in crisis we help them. We put their comfort first.

Atheists do have belief systems, it’s just not supernatural and not predefined, which of course makes life difficult when you’re in a political tussle with a well-organized and single-minded church or religiously affiliated group.

I feel the same sense of wonder that my religious mother does, we just view the world through different lenses. She attributes things to God, and I attribute things to a blend of luck and science. She thinks good things are blessings handed out by a sky father, and I believe that they’re organically occurring positives that are the result of a mix of purpose, history and luck. Either way we can both feel the same wave of pleasure at a particularly beautiful sunset.

10 hours ago, Creekimp13 said:

I don't believe in God or Gods. Or fairies. Or UFOs. That DOES NOT MEAN I DON'T HAVE A BELIEF SYSTEM that is precious and important to me. To suggest my belief system doesn't matter because I don't share your obsession with the supernatural is frankly... incredibly short sighted, self important and insulting.

My belief in science, reason, the quantifiable, in what can be proven with empirical evidence.... is something I take enormous comfort in. Having the courage to tell the truth about what can and cannot be known is hugely important to how I live my life, how I metabolize difficult times, how I survive hardship and live a happy fulfilling life.

Supernatural antiquated beliefs do not comfort me.

You're asserting that a guy saying..."Happy Holidays" in passing is the same as going to someone in crisis and inflicting your beliefs on them. It's not remotely the same.

If prayers are not wanted by the person in crisis, don't announce them! If you don't know...asking is a great way to help. "would you like me to pray for you?" is a pretty easy thing to ask.

Failing to do so would be like me showing up to your mother's funeral and saying...let me comfort you with my beliefs by saying that even though we know this heaven nonsense is a load of rubbish, and she's gone for good now.....she lead an impacting life that is a terrific legacy!

I might feel strongly convicted and I might BELIEVE this in my bones....but to say so in a time of crisis when I know it goes against YOUR beliefs is rude as hell.

it's different. Pay attention.

When people are in crisis we help them. We put their comfort first.

Atheists believe in emotions like love!

12 minutes ago, Mattymatt said:

Atheists believe in emotions like love!

Matty's got a date and posting about emotions, and love and stuff....so sweet

Just now, AshAsh1 said:

Matty's got a date and posting about emotions, and love and stuff....so sweet

LOL! Slow down there ... no love yet but I do like her. She understands the importance of staying focused to achieve weight loss and does med student rounds with a bariatric surgeon. That's why I am excited but have to temper it a little. I don't want to get my hopes up, especially because I am not working yet and still have progress to make. I am starting driving for Schneider National on August 6th. I have to be over 120 days post-op, before Schneider's medical team will clear me.

7 minutes ago, Mattymatt said:

LOL! Slow down there ... no love yet but I do like her. She understands the importance of staying focused to achieve weight loss and does med student rounds with a bariatric surgeon. That's why I am excited but have to temper it a little. I don't want to get my hopes up, especially because I am not working yet and still have progress to make. I am starting driving for Schneider National on August 6th. I have to be over 120 days post-op, before Schneider's medical team will clear me.

I'm glad she ran into you! Sounds like a good fit!

Edited June 21, 20188 yr by AshAsh1

When my father died it rocked my world. Yes I knew he hadn't been well, yes I knew his ?wasn't First Rate, but he beaten much so much in his life, I thought he'd be okay a while longer. Late husband's Aunt Lois came up at the funeral home, mind you I had never exceptionally cared for the woman and wouldn't have minded if she had stayed home, took my hands in hers and said in a very smarmy tone "You have my Sympathy", I did not want her flipping sympathy, I wanted my daddy back, the daddy,who put me on his shoulders at parades so I could see better, no I didn't want the man lying cold in the casket, I wanted the man who looked at life with a twinkle in his eye, that saw both the joy and irony in life! Sympathy, don't give me that empty word. You could have said you were SORRY or since you professed to be such. higher classed Christian. than anyone one else in the Western World you could have offered to "pray that I would have peace in my mind and soul" But Sympathy, that you find on cards at the $1 stores . Take your smarmy self out of my face and take your smarmy sympathy with you and stuff it where the sun☀don't shine! Ta Ta!

Hey! Speaking of bariatric muffins ... that reminds me. I found a protein waffle at the local supermarket. The brand name is Kodiak Cakes. 2 of them have 280 calories and 15g of protein and only a total of 25g of carbs. Very filling an delicious!