I'm almost 3 weeks post op band to sleeve and I've been suffering a bit of depression. I miss the social aspect of food [emoji22] I miss sitting around the table with my family at dinner time or going on date nights with my hubby. The look and smell of food is driving me crazy!!!! My question is does everything go back to normal and when? I know I'll eat really small portions and that my food choices will be really different but will I be able to go to a restaurant again? Will I be able to have a small slice of pizza on the odd occasion? Are certain foods lost forever?

Thanks, feeling very emotional right now and having moments where I ask if I made the right choice [emoji45]

This is just the first stages of your new journey. I am sure you can sit with your family and eat your meals, and go on date nights. Your focus needs to be on what you can have now not what you can't.You can have a healthier life and a bright future, you can have romantic evenings out with your hubby where the food isn't the main point of the evening you all are. What about dancing or star gazing?

Donna

Oh dear... Please relax... Sleeved Dec. 19, 2016... Life will be better for you. I do got out to eat with my family. The only difference is that I do not order. I get to taste test everything from my family's plate. Lol I take a small puzzle book or note pad with me and I am the game leader while they eat. You just have to find a normal for you. Be creative.

Oh dear... Please relax... Sleeved Dec. 19, 2016... Life will be better for you. I do got out to eat with my family. The only difference is that I do not order. I get to taste test everything from my family's plate. Lol I take a small puzzle book or note pad with me and I am the game leader while they eat. You just have to find a normal for you. Be creative.

You will be able to eat more as time goes on, never hat you could eat before. Heck I've seen mukbang sleevers on yt, though I don't recommend it. I definitely have had self pity and doubt moments but it does get better

The key for me has been to re-define my relationship with food where it isn't the centerpiece of my life. I still go out with friends and family; I just don't eat, or I eat a small piece of protein and green vegetables. For me bread, pasta, potatoes, and other carbs are off the table forever. No food or drink is more important than the 200 pounds I have lost. My new lease on life is worth it!

I agree with you AKules. Going out to eat was always a social event. I can't imagine going out and being able to enjoy food the way I used to. I was sleeved on April 24, and even though I am limited in what I can eat at the moment, the thought of sitting at a dining table, picking at other peoples plates for my meal repulses me. I can order a meal, but I will take a few bites and be done while others continue to enjoy their meals. I love my food hot and the tiny bites and how much we have to chew before swallowing, it gets cold fast. And the leftovers at home the next day just doesn't taste the same. I am with you on this subject. It will be very hard.

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It is truly a different way of living. And eating especially

25 minutes ago, KJencius said:

I agree with you AKules. Going out to eat was always a social event. I can't imagine going out and being able to enjoy food the way I used to. I was sleeved on April 24, and even though I am limited in what I can eat at the moment, the thought of sitting at a dining table, picking at other peoples plates for my meal repulses me. I can order a meal, but I will take a few bites and be done while others continue to enjoy their meals. I love my food hot and the tiny bites and how much we have to chew before swallowing, it gets cold fast. And the leftovers at home the next day just doesn't taste the same. I am with you on this subject. It will be very hard.

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Honestly, it comes down to having a heart-to-heart with yourself about what is more important to you. And there is no correct answer; it is your determination to make.

Akules82 thank you for posting your frustration. I'm still preop and already having some of these thoughts. Food is currently the only way my family socializes with my other family members so it is going to be weird to sit and not eat. I like the idea of grazing off of my kids plates for now. We currently always take home leftovers so I'm sure a few bites off of theirs won't be a problem.
I'm only on day 2 of my week long preop clear liquid diet and those feelings are stronger than ever. I cooked dinner last night and no one really ate because they weren't hungry. I couldn't have anything so I was frustrated that I wasted time over the stove just to not even be able to enjoy it or have it eaten at all. That got me thinking about what my next 6 months is going to be like and I woke up a cranky mess.


HW: 328 (02/21/17
CW: 278 (down 50 preop)

I'm 9 months out. I'm down 91 pounds. From the time I switched to soft foods right after surgery, I ate with my family. Your food should stay hot for the 30 minutes it takes you to eat. You do not need to be shoveling food in to try to eat while its hot -- in fact, that will physically hurt if you try to eat too fast.

Let's talk about restaurants. We eat out. Frequently. Tonight, after we drop our daughter at her senior prom, we will be heading to a lovely restaurant for dinner. I will have a cocktail. (That's my out to dinner treat.) We'll order an appetizer and I'll have a taste or two of it. I'll order a main course that is likely a protein and veg. The last time I ate at this restaurant, I had one of their famous burgers - served topless. I didn't eat the bottom bun, but it makes it easier for the kitchen to prepare that way. I ate about 1/2 of it because it was an 8 ounce burger. The remainder came home for lunch the next day.

I can have the occasional bowl of pasta or slice of pizza, but to be honest, they make me feel ill so I don't do it often. I'm Italian - I do miss my pasta, but I have it maybe once a month.

We enjoy conversation during our meals. Really, it's not as bad as you are making it in your mind. You will find a way to make it work. But you need to change your relationship with food. Going out to eat isn't really about eating - its about spending time with your family and friends and talking and laughing.

I am glad you posted this. I am 13 days post-op and have struggled mightily with these feelings. I have been scared to DEATH thinking that exact thing - "Will I ever feel normal again"?

My understanding is that in a few months, you'll be out eating regular (good choices) food again, and that the occasional slice of pizza won't kill you. I'm hoping that's the case, anyway, because I can't convince myself to believe I will *never* eat X-food again. I hope to eat WAY less than I used to, but can choose 1-2 bites of something every now and then.

I know that it's a personal and individual choice and once your body calms down a bit, YOU get to have the ability to make the choices!

I've been out a few times. The first was during the full liquids phase. I ordered a hot tea and glass of milk. Took all meal to almost finish both. Didn't notice not having food.

The 2nd time was to a steakhouse. I was on soft foods. Ordered a sweet potato and had an ounce of my hubby's rare steak. He was finished eating by time I got through the steak and an ounce of sweet potato.

Now, at 10 weeks, I can eat a cup of soup. No problem.