I am a firm believer that no one should have the right to tell another how to feel. I may not agree with how someone is feeling in response to a certain situation or event, but who am I to tell them to feel differently. When I read Scripture and I see what is written in Psalm, Lamentations, and other place it does not strike me as wrong when various Biblical figures cried out to God, shed tears, and so on.

It is true that the way in which someone is feeling can be an indicator of with deeper roots, but who is best to determine that? Well I think that person.

I am going to feel ALL my feels in this life. When those feelings come no one is witness to the battle I am having in pray about them. They do not hear the conversations I have with those closest to me to process. They do not see me doing research about it. With that said how can they, people I do not know well, be in a position to tell me what I should do with my feelings?

Often times before I express a feeling out loud I have already prayed about it for a number of days. I give those feelings over to the one who fully sees and understands the situation. My hurt feelings, sorrow, and disappointments draw me closer to the Lord. It makes me seek Him out and call on Him. It strengthens my faith

Being honest about how one feels is the first step to address that emotion. If I feel shame, oh there that word is, I have to acknowledge that is how I am doing before I can take steps to address it.

I am gonna let no body tell me how to feel. And dare I say especially not a group of complete strangers on BP. (I say that with all due respect) I encourage you with the same. Feel how you feel. If you do not like that you are on a stall-- its all right, you do not like that you have not made a goal-- its all right, and so on. God made you with emotions and a thinking mind. Feel it, process, and make a plan. Suppression is not going to work. How you feel is not who you are as a person.

I think you're misinterpreting the comments completely. People are not telling you how to feel as much as trying to help you reframe the negative connotations you're posting about - it is support and attempts to help you, not telling you what to do or how to feel. And taking things meant to be helpful as offensive speaks to your inability to hear and process other viewpoints and begs the question of whether you are closing your mind off instead of being open and accepting of what is out there.

If you don't want advice or opinions, I'd suggest you post your thoughts in a personal blog instead of a public forum that is specifically here for support and back-and-forth commentary. Not that you're not perfectly welcome to do whatever you'd like, but you should expect others to post their own thoughts on what you post about here unless you specifically tell everyone that you don't want any comments or are at all interested in what anyone else has to say.

Something to think about anyway, but I have a feeling you will just find this offensive as well even though I'm trying to help you. Good luck, and I will try to remember not to comment on any more of your posts going forward.

I am a firm believer that no one should have the right to tell another how to feel. I may not agree with how someone is feeling in response to a certain situation or event, but who am I to tell them to feel differently. When I read Scripture and I see what is written in Psalm, Lamentations, and other place it does not strike me as wrong when various Biblical figures cried out to God, shed tears, and so on.

It is true that the way in which someone is feeling can be an indicator of with deeper roots, but who is best to determine that? Well I think that person.

I am going to feel ALL my feels in this life. When those feelings come no one is witness to the battle I am having in pray about them. They do not hear the conversations I have with those closest to me to process. They do not see me doing research about it. With that said how can they, people I do not know well, be in a position to tell me what I should do with my feelings?

Often times before I express a feeling out loud I have already prayed about it for a number of days. I give those feelings over to the one who fully sees and understands the situation. My hurt feelings, sorrow, and disappointments draw me closer to the Lord. It makes me seek Him out and call on Him. It strengthens my faith

Being honest about how one feels is the first step to address that emotion. If I feel shame, oh there that word is, I have to acknowledge that is how I am doing before I can take steps to address it.

I am gonna let no body tell me how to feel. And dare I say especially not a group of complete strangers on BP. (I say that with all due respect) I encourage you with the same. Feel how you feel. If you do not like that you are on a stall-- its all right, you do not like that you have not made a goal-- its all right, and so on. God made you with emotions and a thinking mind. Feel it, process, and make a plan. Suppression is not going to work. How you feel is not who you are as a person.

I agree that no one has the right to tell someone how to feel. Your feelings are your feelings. You get to choose how you express them or share them.

But, no one has the right to tell someone how to respond. You can ask nicely, but ultimately, it is up to you to choose how you react to that response.

Giving and receiving advice and constructive criticism is a skill. In my opinion, it is a skill that we all improve at with experience, practice, and effort. Especially, on the receiving end.

When I pray for guidance or wisdom, God's answers sometimes comes from the most unlikely place and in unexpected ways.

Being willing to listen to feedback is a gift. Take what you can use and leave the rest.

I will keep that in consideration.

I think you're misinterpreting the comments completely. People are not telling you how to feel as much as trying to help you reframe the negative connotations you're posting about - it is support and attempts to help you, not telling you what to do or how to feel. And taking things meant to be helpful as offensive speaks to your inability to hear and process other viewpoints and begs the question of whether you are closing your mind off instead of being open and accepting of what is out there.

If you don't want advice or opinions, I'd suggest you post your thoughts in a personal blog instead of a public forum that is specifically here for support and back-and-forth commentary. Not that you're not perfectly welcome to do whatever you'd like, but you should expect others to post their own thoughts on what you post about here unless you specifically tell everyone that you don't want any comments or are at all interested in what anyone else has to say.

Something to think about anyway, but I have a feeling you will just find this offensive as well even though I'm trying to help you. Good luck, and I will try to remember not to comment on any more of your posts going forward.

Indeed. I am simply trying to say we have to be careful. Anytime I read a post no matter if it is here or somewhere else I have to be honest about the limits of the information I receive. If I do not have all the information then I have to acknowledge any assessment I make is going to be somewhat blinded. Someone telling me, "you need to work on your self esteem." Is short sighted. And that is what I took offense to mostly. Just as someone is free to say that. I should be free in response to say what I think.

I am a firm believer that no one should have the right to tell another how to feel. I may not agree with how someone is feeling in response to a certain situation or event, but who am I to tell them to feel differently. When I read Scripture and I see what is written in Psalm, Lamentations, and other place it does not strike me as wrong when various Biblical figures cried out to God, shed tears, and so on.

It is true that the way in which someone is feeling can be an indicator of with deeper roots, but who is best to determine that? Well I think that person.

I am going to feel ALL my feels in this life. When those feelings come no one is witness to the battle I am having in pray about them. They do not hear the conversations I have with those closest to me to process. They do not see me doing research about it. With that said how can they, people I do not know well, be in a position to tell me what I should do with my feelings?


Often times before I express a feeling out loud I have already prayed about it for a number of days. I give those feelings over to the one who fully sees and understands the situation. My hurt feelings, sorrow, and disappointments draw me closer to the Lord. It makes me seek Him out and call on Him. It strengthens my faith

Being honest about how one feels is the first step to address that emotion. If I feel shame, oh there that word is, I have to acknowledge that is how I am doing before I can take steps to address it.

I am gonna let no body tell me how to feel. And dare I say especially not a group of complete strangers on BP. (I say that with all due respect) I encourage you with the same. Feel how you feel. If you do not like that you are on a stall-- its all right, you do not like that you have not made a goal-- its all right, and so on. God made you with emotions and a thinking mind. Feel it, process, and make a plan. Suppression is not going to work. How you feel is not who you are as a person.

I agree that no one has the right to tell someone how to feel. Your feelings are your feelings. You get to choose how you express them or share them.

But, no one has the right to tell someone how to respond. You can ask nicely, but ultimately, it is up to you to choose how you react to that response.

Giving and receiving advice and constructive criticism is a skill. In my opinion, it is a skill that we all improve at with experience, practice, and effort. Especially, on the receiving end.

When I pray for guidance or wisdom, God's answers sometimes comes from the most unlikely place and in unexpected ways.

Being willing to listen to feedback is a gift. Take what you can use and leave the rest.

I wish you wouldn't put God in all your posts. It is a poor excuse for your crappy attitude. Being a good Christian doesn't mean wearing your Christianity like a cloak or trying to shove it down other people throats.

Since you read you bible so much I am sure you are well versed on what was said about the hypocrites.

Hit dogs holler.

Edited February 13, 201610 yr by OutsideMatchInside

To be fair I am just trying to be honest about who I am as a person. I agree that being a "good" Christian, whatever that means, is not wearing one's faith as a cloak. I am not sure how I am cramming things down people's throats if we are all free to read or not read as we chose. I am not sure how I am being a hypocrite, but if you would like to explain your view further I will read it. Also, I am willing to hear your thoughts on how my attitude is crappy. I am just not getting your point and sense you took the time to respond to what I read I am sure you want me to understand. If you do not respond to my questions that is fine, but remember this you are free to not read or comment on anything I post. And in my opinion is one is free to do or not do something there is no force.

I wish you wouldn't put God in all your posts. It is a poor excuse for your crappy attitude. Being a good Christian doesn't mean wearing your Christianity like a cloak or trying to shove it down other people throats.

Since you read you bible so much I am sure you are well versed on what was said about the hypocrites.

Hit dogs holler.

I have spent an entire day with my Priest and heard God and the Bible used less than you have is these 2 threads.

Like I said, a hit dogs will holler.

Edited February 13, 201610 yr by OutsideMatchInside

WOT people! (Somewhat amusing, however)

I have spent an entire day with my Priest and heard God and the Bible used less than you have is these 2 threads.

Like I said, a hit dogs will holler.

@@OutsideMatchInside If you do not like reading my post feel free to not read. Again this reply is not an answer to any of the questions I posed you.

There was a preacher who fell in the ocean and he couldn't swim. When a boat came by, the captain yelled, "Do you need help, sir?" The preacher calmly said "No, God will save me."

A little later, another boat came by and a fisherman asked, "Hey, do you need help?" The preacher replied again, "No God will save me." Eventually the preacher drowned & went to heaven. The preacher asked God, "Why didn't you save me?" God replied, "Fool, I sent you two boats!"

You made a thread that didn't got how you wanted. Then you made another thread to take everyone to task for taking your first thread on face value. You could have just stayed in the first thread or taken a break but you decided to make another dramatic thread.

I made a thread when my was freshly sleeved and my hormones were all crazy. Almost no one agreed with my opinion, even though I wasn't looking for opinions I was just venting. I stopped responding to the thread and I will never bring the topic up on this forum again.

If people don't say what you want, you can just take a break or ignore them.

@@OutsideMatchInside, I have heard you. If I am understanding you correctly you think I should have kept quite after the first post. I see some truth in that. And you are right I can ignore or take a break. Both are reasonable. I see your side. At the same time you said you are tired of reading my post with God mentioned. Could you have taken a break? I hope that did not come across as attitude. I am just trying to make a point. Anyways, I was not sure if you would respond and I am glad you did. You gave me something to think about and that is never a bad thing. Lastly, I am going to keep mentioning God in my post. Not because I am trying to offend. Your right I am a hypocrite along with the other 99% of humanity! lol But God is good and He is more than worth of my mention even if I make some not too graceful decisions. I hope we can dialogue in the future. Have a good day.

You made a thread that didn't got how you wanted. Then you made another thread to take everyone to task for taking your first thread on face value. You could have just stayed in the first thread or taken a break but you decided to make another dramatic thread.

I made a thread when my was freshly sleeved and my hormones were all crazy. Almost no one agreed with my opinion, even though I wasn't looking for opinions I was just venting. I stopped responding to the thread and I will never bring the topic up on this forum again.

If people don't say what you want, you can just take a break or ignore them.

For my two cents, I welcome the mention of God and His hand in our lives. I'm sorry, OutsideMatch, if you are offended at His mention, and I am surprised that after spending all day with a priest, you have heard the Bible mentioned less. Be that as it may, as a fellow believer, I take comfort in God's presence in my life, even and especially when my attitude leaves something to be desired. I can only speak for myself, but my faith is the backbone of my existence, and not to mention it, even in passing, is a foreign concept to me. My surgery is coming up next month, and I take extraordinary comfort in knowing that God is going to be with me throughout this process, no matter how much weight I lose, or how many goals I make or miss. I truly wish the same peace for you.

To 1Cor2:9: keep praying, and keep relying on Him. HE is our Father and our helper. Thank Him for His blaeesings, and they will continue. Much love.