I have wanted to have bariatric surgery for some time; I'm obese (BMI 36), and my weight has been an issue since childhood. I'm now 44 and sick and tired of struggling with it.

I have two problems; I struggle with overeating (binge eating), and I'm concerned that this would be an issue after surgery. I know that studies show surgery can have a positive effect of overeating behaviours, but I'm still anxious. I'm also finding that my husband does not believe I would be happy adjusting after surgery - he thinks I would not be able to cope as "I enjoy my food too much". He doesn't understand that I don't - I don't enjoy food at all.

Can anyone offer any advice? Here in the UK I would have to pay for the surgery.

Since your BMI is so low and you have problems with overeating, it might be a good idea to talk to a therapist before you begin the process of weight loss surgery. Surgery can help some people (temporarily) to eat less and better, but that does not last and is not guaranteed. It would be a shame to go through an invasive, major surgery only to suffer from old habits that were not addressed. In the end, only you can decide if surgery is right for you. Just make sure you are properly prepared and have the best support system and emotional tools and you will be successful.

I agree. Having surgery is not going to change your head and how you view food. It will stay the same and could be a big issue post op. I would definitely start some therapy, take your time and really think about it. Especially since your bmi is on the lower end. I would really question having surgery. I was on the lower end myself and regret it. I could have done it on my own.

@@LColandrea I just read your story and wow, I'm very sorry to hear about everything you've been through.

@@Joz31 Thank you:) Hopefully everything will get resolved somehow!

I agree that you probably need to talk with a therapist that is focused on Bariatrics. They will help you work through the head issues.

I think it would also be beneficial for you to really do some serious research on obesity. It is a metabolic disease and many people don't understand what happens with our bodies when we have this disease.

Yes, you could probably lose the weight on your own. The biggest question is can you keep it off long term? For most of us the answer is no and over time we put that weight we lost back on and then add some more on top of it. Then we start the whole process over again only to get heavier and heavier. Our bodies are at war with us.

As you get older, even trying to lose anything becomes more and more difficult. That is our metabolism slowing even further.

I have said this at least 1000 times since i had bypass. If I had anything I regretted it was not having this surgery 10 years earlier. I waited too long and damaged my joints and my spine permanently.

Also, if you work through these issues with your therapist they will help you work with the head issues which will in turn prepare you for the lifetime commitment of eating better.

In the end your relationship with food changes. You no longer live to eat, you eat to live. Food is not as important as it was.

It is important though that you understand what you are in for and that you are ready. I might suggest bringing your husband along for the ride so he understands what obesity is and what it means. Your choice will impact him as well.

My husband has been extremely supportive and understands that my cooking was going to change for both of us.

I was never diagnosed as a binge eater but that's how I ate my whole life. I am now 20 months post LapBand and WLS was the right choice for me. I have not binged since pre op. I did decide to change everything and commit to this new life.

Whether or not you choose to have surgery, I would recommend seeing a therapist to deal with binge eating. In the event you do have the surgery having therapeutic support would be an asset.