Hello my name is Sam. I started my journey back in November of 14. Found out that I was diabetic. My whole life I've been on the heavy side. Some years growing up I would get a thinner year in here or there but the majority I've been heavy. Both parents passed at the young age of 65. Both had diabetes and the many many complications of diabetes and other diseases took their lives early. I've struggled for years to try to loose weight but it always creeps back up.

Once I found out that I was diabetic I thought ok is time to do something more, a tool to help me loose more weight and hopefully keep it off. I know it's not the easy way out. I know it takes a lot of hard work and dedication to get where I need and want to be.

In order to get survey I need 6 months of Dr visits, psych evaluation, and to loose 17lbs. Since November I've lost 12lbs. I go in next week to see what I've lost this far. I know I've lost more because clothes are feeling looser. I know it's not always lbs but inches too. Someday soon I will take my measurements too so I can see progress down the road.

Thinking about food funerals as they've been called and things that I want to have at least once more before surgery. But this is what also gives me a panic attack of not eating things or not being able to stomach things I once ate.

Thank you to all that have put their stories out there for encouragement and the not so pretty side of things. I'm hoping to have a July surgery. Right in between two sports for my kids in hopes that I can be somewhat ready for the next sport. When I know my surgery date for sure I'll post back and if I think of stuff that makes me go hmmmmm. I'll post here.

Thank you!

I'll be right behind you, Sam -

I am in the early stages of getting through the program leading to surgery. I went to the required info session, started the 6mo. physician supervised weightloss required by insurance, and had my psych eval last week. I left that appointment feeling great - he said he would recommend me as a good candidate and went over some really great info. I got the call yesterday to schedule my first med eval/dietician appointments, and thanks to a cancelation while we were on the phone, I have those appointments tomorrow! I really, really wanted to get in the surgery by August, but I don't think that will happen - likely September. That's a tough work time for me, but we'll see.

Your comment about food funerals, I get it. The psych said something in our appointment that stuck with me. He mentioned that idea and said if you need to do it, go do it. But then come back and see me when it's over, and then we'll get started. Basically, he was saying that the mindshift and mindfulness have to start right now if I'm going to go down this path, otherwise I'm not ready. So I left that appointment saying "I'm ready," and I keep trying to reminding myself that I mean it every time I'm tempted. I am a binger as well as overeater, so I know the hard emotional/diet work is just beginning.

That said, I gave up pop a couple of weeks ago. That is a tough one. I can't promise I won't down a can during one of those last days before surgery .

Requiem. Let's keep in touch and cheer each other on. I should have mentioned that I have changed my eating habits as well. I like leaving stuff on the plate when I know I'm getting full. In addition to choosing different foods or substituting a Protein shake to replace a meal.

As far as the evil caffeine I gave up my coffee back in December. The hard part is quitting the soda. Getting past the headaches has been hard for me. So I give up and go back. Any tips on kicking pop in the butt?

Dear Sam and Requiem, my heart goes out to both of you. I had surgery in 2010. Food was every thing .. All my emotions , happy , sad ,mad ,and just because it smelled or tasted good. My biggest problem was and still is sugar.. I come from a long line of home cooks and bakers. Going into this I knew I did this to my self with food . I loved it and hated it at the same time and I still do.. I knew this surgery was a tool not a magic wand. I knew all the hard work , sweat and tears were on me to put in not anyone else . I have had great days on top of the world since. And I have had days of utter darkness. For every one the mental and physical struggles will be different. There is no one way to fix us all. We will get through this with each other by giving support , praise , love , and gentle but firm pushes. Just know that in the dark days there is sun shine on the horizon, you just have to want to make it there and know deep down inside you deserve it , your worth it , you will make it . And we will pull you through. With much love , Kendra

Thanks for the encouragement, Kendra!