I'm really torn. I had an appointment with my psychiatrist whom I respect very much. I brought up the fact that I've started the process of having the gastric bypass done and he was very much so against it. He told me I was too young and not overweight enough, that many women my age look just like me. He also said there are many different ways for me to try and lose this weight that aren't WLS, and didn't waiver in opinion when I listed the dozens of ways I've attempted for years. I have to take medication for life because of a pre existing condition, so I asked if his concern was me not being able to absorb the medications as well and he said not really (that having been my only concern). I don't know what to think now. He told me to cut my stomach and torture myself with food is no way to live, and no way to lose weight. I feel a little defeated before it even began :[ I guess I just want someone's opinion, someone's support. My family isn't very supportive of this either.

I understand why you're feeling torn, but don't let one person's opinion turn you away from something you are doing for yourself. He says you're too young and not heavy enough? I imagine there are hundreds of people on here who would say "If only I'd done this when I was still young, before I gained so much more..."

This is a decision you have to make for yourself. If support is what you need, you'll find it here. I wish you the best.

I understand why you're feeling torn, but don't let one person's opinion turn you away from something you are doing for yourself. He says you're too young and not heavy enough? I imagine there are hundreds of people on here who would say "If only I'd done this when I was still young, before I gained so much more..."

This is a decision you have to make for yourself. If support is what you need, you'll find it here. I wish you the best.

you're right, I guess I'm just deterred being that he as my doctor didn't agree with the idea at all. But I know how I've struggled, and that this is going to be what's best for me. Thank you very much for your input.

Please also remember that he is NOT a bariatric doctor. There is a reason insurance companies cover these surgeries, it is not as cut and dry as he is making it out to be. And comparing you to other fat women is hardly a healthy standard. If you are eligible for the surgery via requirements then you are eligible for all of the health risks associated with it, that in itself is at least reason enough to speak to a bariatric counselor who can give you an unbiased opinion.

My PCP is against it as well (luckily I don't need a referral). He said he only recommends it for people who are basically dying unless they have it. Why would I want to wait until I'm in that bad a shape? I'm 100 lbs over ideal weight and already have hypertension, asthma, reflux and pre-diabetes.

I don't think he really knows much about it, though, b/c he also said he had seen many patients with the "sweater" regain most of their lost weight. Sweater - sleeve?

I like him otherwise and he's been very helpful with many things but I decided that in light of what is obviously ignorance in that field I need other opinions based on real fact.

My therapist (not a psychologist) has been mostly positive, b/c she's seen me work on the emotional issues behind my eating for several years. She does keep reminding me that at my age (52) I'm liable to see a lot more wrinkles and chicken-neck after I lose a lot of weight, but I'm not doing this for looks. I just want to be more active and healthy, and get decent-fitting clothing easily.

Please also remember that he is NOT a bariatric doctor. There is a reason insurance companies cover these surgeries, it is not as cut and dry as he is making it out to be. And comparing you to other fat women is hardly a healthy standard. If you are eligible for the surgery via requirements then you are eligible for all of the health risks associated with it, that in itself is at least reason enough to speak to a bariatric counselor who can give you an unbiased opinion.

Thank you, I definitely am still meeting with the surgeon and his nutritionist. I almost feel guilty going against his advice but I have to do this for myself.

My PCP is against it as well (luckily I don't need a referral). He said he only recommends it for people who are basically dying unless they have it. Why would I want to wait until I'm in that bad a shape? I'm 100 lbs over ideal weight and already have hypertension, asthma, reflux and pre-diabetes.

I don't think he really knows much about it, though, b/c he also said he had seen many patients with the "sweater" regain most of their lost weight. Sweater - sleeve?

I like him otherwise and he's been very helpful with many things but I decided that in light of what is obviously ignorance in that field I need other opinions based on real fact.

My therapist (not a psychologist) has been mostly positive, b/c she's seen me work on the emotional issues behind my eating for several years. She does keep reminding me that at my age (52) I'm liable to see a lot more wrinkles and chicken-neck after I lose a lot of weight, but I'm not doing this for looks. I just want to be more active and healthy, and get decent-fitting clothing easily.

Funny, my therapist was also supportive with my decision to start this process. Thank you, and good luck!

Good for you. That makes you a savvy consumer, do not feel guilty! Never just trust one opinion on anything, especially medical!

Doctors in other specialties don't always understand Bariatric surgery. I put mine off for years because my gastro-enterologist (sp?) said I wasn't a good candidate! I've had two bariatric surgeons from different practices say I am a good candidate. I didn't see that he said it was a bad move for psychological reasons, so I would see what the bariatric surgeon says, and get the psych eval from a psychologist who deals with bariatric surgery. I used to feel guilty getting second opinions, but now I stand up for myself. best wishes to you on your journey!

Good for you. That makes you a savvy consumer, do not feel guilty! Never just trust one opinion on anything, especially medical!

Thank you so much for the support!

Doctors in other specialties don't always understand Bariatric surgery. I put mine off for years because my gastro-enterologist (sp?) said I wasn't a good candidate! I've had two bariatric surgeons from different practices say I am a good candidate. I didn't see that he said it was a bad move for psychological reasons, so I would see what the bariatric surgeon says, and get the psych eval from a psychologist who deals with bariatric surgery. I used to feel guilty getting second opinions, but now I stand up for myself. best wishes to you on your journey!

He actually told me psychologically that I would be stable enough mentally and my pre existing condition would have nothing to do with the psych evaluation. I am going to keep my appointments with the surgeon and the nutritionist, the comments on here definitely helped keep me on track with what my goal is. Thank you so much :]