I'm getting surgery through Kaiser Southern CA, so I had a huge preparation process for this. I started taking weekly classes in June and finished in early September. During that whole time I was doing pretty well - writing down all my food, eating ~1300 calories a day, and trying to up my fitness. I joined a gym and go about 2-3 times a week.

Unfortunately, since my classes stopped, that's probably about the only habit I've kept up. I haven't gone completely off the food addicts deep end, but I stopped writing down what I eat, I stopped weighing in, and I know I've gained some of that weight back. Not as bad as it could be, but some.

Compounding that, now, is the fact that I am having my surgery in exactly one week - October 14. My surgeon doesnt require ANY kind of pre-op diet (I almost wish he did!) so I am getting this desperate feeling like I only have one more week to eat the foods I love. I know that's not true and I'm trying not to let that sabotage my behavior even more, but I guess I'm just really nervous.

I want this for myself so badly. I want a normal relationship with food, but I don't see how to get there. I am so afraid that I will go to my pre-op appointment tomorrow and my surgeon will delay my surgery because I have gained weight. I am so scared that the deep down eating urges I am trying - with limited success - to fight right now will never go away or be lessened. I'm just really scared. And not even about the actual procedure, weirdly.

I was very scared about giving up food as well. As messed up as my relationship with food was/is, I still LOVE food and I wasn't willing to give any of it up forever. Sleeve isn't going to fix the emotional side of the equation. That's something you are going to need to continue to work on for yourself. So far (I'm only 5 weeks post-op) I haven't done anything crazy when it comes to food, because I haven't had much choice. I've followed the guidelines about what foods to eat when and my restriction is still very restrictive. So I really haven't had any opportunity to go off the deep end by, say, trying to eat a whole large pizza like I used to. I haven't even had a slice of pizza or a bite of pizza. Because I'm still on mushies and can't have solids until Friday. I have no plans to run right out and grab a piece of pizza first think on Friday either. But that doesn't mean I won't eventually, because those emotions are all still there.

Maybe trick your mind to say that your doc DID in fact require a liquid diet 3 days prior to surgery, take in protien, Soups, just stuff easy on your stomach and it will really help you to 1. lose some extra weight before surgery and 2. prepare you for the liquid diet that you start with after surgery.

I am 5 months post op, I am down 93 lbs and to put your worries at ease a bit even if you go off the deep end and decide you want a cheeseburger at some point, you can't have more than a bite or two before your body will tell you that's too much and you will be done, then you will of had your taste and you can move on. It gets easier, believe me, so much easier to make the right choices, because you WANT to do this for you, you will WANT to take in the right stuff, not fall back on old habbits and junk food. Sure junk food happens but don't let it get you down, just work a little harder that day at the gym and make the next day better. You CAN do this and we are all here for you!!

First of all don't beat yourself up just get back on track I'm 2 years out of gastric sleeve. You never get it right 100% but learn from your mistakes. You want to increase activty so that you feel good after surgery and be able to elminate gas ... and your recovery isn't long ... Secondly you want to start now so that you create a lifestyle change and make good habits. I have the same feelings since surgery and even now but don't let it scare you make positive changes encourage yourself if you have to ...don't stop keep working towards your goal ...

I think that feeling of saying goodbye to the foods you love is a totally normal thing. I clearly remember a several month long "food funeral" that I had before my surgery. I actually ended up gaining a few pounds! Even with all of that, I've been quite successful after surgery. And I only had to do liquids the day before my surgery as well. No worries! It sounds like you have done the research and preparation necessary to be successful. Good luck on your journey~!.