I initially visited my surgeon to consult for a hernia repair. Because I weighed 424 pounds, and he specialized in bariactric patients, I preferred to go to him because I felt a doctor who was used to doing surgery on someone who was morbidly obese, would be a safer choice than a surgeon whose practice did not have so many opportunities to operated on large individuals.

I had considered bariatric surgery in the past but because I only had Medicare and limited income, I did not believe that I could afford the hospital and physician copays. But based on what his office told me, I began the program with the bariatric diet of 700-900 calories, consisting of 70-80 grams of Protein, 40-50 of carbs, 20-30 of fat, and the elimination of fruits, breads, pastas, etc.

That diet actually began October 3, 2013. Since that date, I have lost 135 pounds on my own, but I have remained indecisive about the surgery.

I flip back and forth between the sleeve, and the lap band, favoring the sleeve. However, the truth is that I am terrified to change my body in that manner. Yet when I consider the lap band and read about all the issues that those patients deal with, I go back to the sleeve.

The day is coming when I have to make a decision since my hernia must be fixed anyway. Most of my friends and my boyfriend are telling me DON'T DO IT. They say I have done so well without it. But I know my history of up and down yo-yo dieting. I am afraid that I have not finally learned the lessons to eat properly and that I will slip back into old habits. I know that these surgeries are merely tools and I have to have discipline with or without the surgery and that brings me right back to square one.

I am 64 years old, tired of being fat, and worried. I am a diabetic, and just the weight I have already lost has changed my insulin needs down to almost nothing. No matter how much I research, I cannot decide. Everyone seems to have great stories of success with the WLS but I am sure that there are people who wish that they had not changed their bodies.

Can anyone help me through my fears and onto the next move? I really fear losing my doctor, he is not into weight loss, he is a surgeon. The more I go over my options, the more I am frozen with indecision.

The bottom line is that I am frightened of the sleeve's permanency, and of failing if I do not have the operation. Yet I know my boyfriend will NOT be supportive post surgically, and I have no family, just friends who are all against what they call, a drastic step.

I am asking for all the pros, cons, and advice anyone can give to me. Thanks.

Just reading through this thread now - I was so glad to see that you're planning to move forward with the surgery!

I am SO impressed with how well you've done with that diet! You are clearly incredibly disciplined and committed which means you'll do great after surgery - and you won't become part of the 95% of people who regain weight lost on diets!

Like others I really hope your boyfriend comes around and supports you! My husband is against the sleeve because he's scared that I'll end up being one of the rare few that have lifelong complications. But he will support me anyway. He accepts that it's my decision - I'm sure it helps that he has not taken my advice about his health decisions, so he knows he can't blame me for doing the same.

I look forward to seeing your updates - in awe of your strength and how far you've already come!