My last talk with the incredibly skinny counselor at the program has me feeling down. I need encouragement I guess.

Going over twenty years of failure and bad choices is depressing enough. Going over my perfect storm of reasons for getting here is not a good feeling.

I told her there are days when I just feel like I'm hungry no matter what I do. And it was like she didn't believe me. She said I'm either not eating enough or not eating at the right intervals or I'm not eating the right foods. So I started thinking if that's the case why exactly do I need this surgery?

I told her I look forward to not being hungry and she said that I would feel hungry if I did it right eventually. I don't want to feel hungry. Again why have the surgery?

She said that some people look so forward to finally eating solid food and then they feel depressed that they could only eat a few bites. I would be ecstatic! To finally feel like I'm in control of food would be amazing.

It was just a bizarre talk, I don't know if she was testing me or what. She just made it seem like if I really wanted to I could do it without the surgery. What in the world?

A lot of people lose weight without the surgery BuT a lot of people don't. Only YOU will know whether or not you can do it without the surgery. I dieted for over 30 years so I knew that if I hadn't done it in 30 years, then I couldn't do it on my own. Even with the surgery, it's not automatic and some people lose and some don't. The surgery is simply a tool that allows you to control your eating portions WHILE WE LEARN new eating and lifestyle habits.

I will be honest I feel exactly like what the counselor said. I thought I would be so happy to get to solids and it was such a let down. I feel like cooking is such a waste. I can't enjoy eating just a few bites it fills my stomach but it is not satisfying otherwise. I am still trying to adjust to a new normal 3 months out.

<p>A lot of people lose weight without the surgery BuT a lot of people don't. Only YOU will know whether or not you can do it without the surgery. I dieted for over 30 years so I knew that if I hadn't done it in 30 years, then I couldn't do it on my own. Even with the surgery, it's not automatic and some people lose and some don't. The surgery is simply a tool that allows you to control your eating portions WHILE WE LEARN new eating and lifestyle habits. </p>

I think that's true, it's been twenty years. If I could do it I would have already. It was just a very odd talk. i don't really enjoy eating much now anyway, I'm so ambivalent or feeling guilty or clueless about it at this point.

"I told her there are days when I just feel like I'm hungry no matter what I do. And it was like she didn't believe me."

I understand this completely! I'm slated for surgery Wednesday and I'm looking forward to finally having control over food. If I had the ability to stop when a reasonable person would be full I wouldn't be in this mess. I feel like I have the stomach equivalent of Mary Poppins carpet bag, there is NO BOTTOM! It's so disheartening to never feel full or be hungry an hour after eating all the time.

Good luck to you!

Thanks! I think I stretched my stomach out binge eating and now that I don't binge it's so big I'm never really full.