Tomorrow I go to the Dr. to see if the sleeve is right for me. Im gonna try and get a medical loan to get it so hopefully everything works out. I really need this because if it works like people say I will love myself for once in my life. I know that sounds crazy but ever since I was obese I always hated myself. So maybe this will help me get to loving myself. Need prayer thanks in advance :-)

Hey! You are worth loving with or without the sleeve!

Congrats on this big first step! It's wonderful news that you're able to take decisive action and make such a major decision to improve your life! I'm worried when I hear you say you hope the surgery will make you stop hating yourself. This surgery is a great health improver, but there's no guarantee how you'll feel about yourself afterwards. You could easily end up skinny but unhappy.

I'd guess we all come into this with pretty low self image due to all of our previous failures at weight loss. But I would recommend taking some time to understand what's contributed to your self image and weight issues to this point before actually having the surgery. For most people it's not just stomach capacity that led to the weight gain.

For those of us using insurance, we had to sit down with a psyche professional and they usually poke around and try to unpack these issues for each of us. Your doctor can probably recommend someone similar that works with MWL patients. I think it'd be a great benefit to you if you reached out to them for some counseling before making your mind up.

I hope I don't sound preachy. I would just hate to see you spend all that money and go through everything and end up unhappy. I will pray for you and I hope you get to a really great place!

My psych evaluation is coming up on the 9/18, same day as my surgeon visit. I am actually looking forward to it because the damage to my self image comes from former spousal abuse. I was able to make a daring escape in the middle of the night, and got a divorce, and moved far away, and went back to college at the age of 56, but I never got counseling. His hurtful words come back often, but I have to knock them away like cobwebs. My self-worth shouldn't depend on the ghosts of rages past. I (and you) are loveable and worth being loved. It is bad enough that people can hurt us so much with their words, but I do encourage you to not mentally abuse yourself. The surgery can definitely be the catalyst that gets your health on track. I agree with 2Big2Skate that a psych visit can help you get your thinking on track so that the surgery has complete advantage for you. I am looking forward to mine to help me put my surgery in the proper perspective.