Guess how I feel today...

A dollar for the first person that gets it right!!!

It the "all or nothing" mentality that turns success to failure IMHO. You may eventually reach your goal but it always goes much slower the closer you get, so they say. I wouldn't know since I've never bern there. But punishing yourself and feeling like a failure because you haven't reached a particular number, BMI or goal weight, seems self-defeating to me. What do you want the most for yourself that is a direct result of your weight loss and that you haven't already achieved? Our bodies don't know from BMI. It's just a measurement created by the healthcare industry which, IMHO, is pretty damn arbitrary!

pre-surgery weight 325; surgery date 2/28/2013; surgery weight 307; 8 weeks past-op weight 281.4; 12 weeks post-op 274; 4 month post-op 266.2; 5 month post-op 262.6

Wow two really good points of view ladies!

I must be in a really big internal struggle..

Because your words brought tears to my eyes.

Thank you for helping me uncover what's going on here. I'm older so maybe I was aiming for the stars..

I've been thinking a lot about this. All week as a matter of fact...

I wonder what would happened if I just let it be, Not spend everyday with one thing on my mind, goal. I have my ticker and I see it and believe I have to make it move. I set that number and now I must make it! I don't have a ticker into real life, But this damn ticker drives me. And right now it's driving me crazy!

I picked this number and I feel I must get to it or I won't be a success.. That I will have failed another weight loss attempt. I have moments where I break through and say how silly is that! I move, I hike, I take no medications how can that not be a success!

BMI BMI BMI... I was trying to explain to my mother today why I need to lose more, I need that BMI. Of course she goes by looks and I look good to her.. But if I don't make that BMI, will I feel I failed again? And in failing will I gain weight again???

You know I don't know whether to send you a hug or throttle you! How many times have you given the advice to take things slow and steady, work the sleeve and it will work for you? How may newbies have you smacked over the head for getting discouraged and wanting to give up or convinced they broke their sleeve? How many others have you helped believe in themselves and that the struggle and sweat and tears are all worth it?

No one will believe in you until you believe in yourself. Now take some of that advice that you so freely dish out! I may not always agree with everything you say, but I do respect you enough to know that you genuinely care and now you need to point all that good advice inwards. Forgive yourself, heal yourself, love yourself...that's all I got.

Oh and the scale is JUST A NUMBER..I swear to god I am going to get that tattoed on my ass.

You know I don't know whether to send you a hug or throttle you! How many times have you given the advice to take things slow and steady' date=' work the sleeve and it will work for you? How may newbies have you smacked over the head for getting discouraged and wanting to give up or convinced they broke their sleeve? How many others have you helped believe in themselves and that the struggle and sweat and tears are all worth it?

No one will believe in you until you believe in yourself. Now take some of that advice that you so freely dish out! I may not always agree with everything you say, but I do respect you enough to know that you genuinely care and now you need to point all that good advice inwards. Forgive yourself, heal yourself, love yourself...that's all I got.

Oh and the scale is JUST A NUMBER..I swear to god I am going to get that tattoed on my ass.[/quote']

Lol after you tattoo it can you send me a picture so I can hang it on the refrigerator!

A number, I know it's just a number..

I'm thinking about just letting it ride and see what happens, not go crazy and eat more but relax about not really losing so much anymore.

That's scary though..

Lol after you tattoo it can you send me a picture so I can hang it on the refrigerator!

A number, I know it's just a number..

I'm thinking about just letting it ride and see what happens, not go crazy and eat more but relax about not really losing so much anymore.

That's scary though..

God I hope you have a HUGE ASS Frig..

SEE WHAT I DID THERE!! HAHAHA!!!

Okay I need sleep lol

I think it makes much more sense to set other goals other than a specific weight. Way do you want to do with your new body? Do you want to hike up Half Dome at Yosemite? Run a 5K without stopping? Learn how to surf? Go zip lining?

One of the things I have to continually remind myself is that I can't control how fast I lose the weight. I can control how much Water I drink in a day, how much Protein I take in, how much exercise I get, and how well I track what Im eating. The weight loss will happen if I do all of these things... it won't happen just because I set a weight loss goal.

Enough of the negative self talk! Look in the mirror and repeat after me.... I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone it, people like me! Set a goal to do this 5 times a day.

Don't think so much! It's nor good for your brain!????

pre-surgery weight 325; surgery date 2/28/2013; surgery weight 307; 8 weeks past-op weight 281.4; 12 weeks post-op 274; 4 month post-op 266.2; 5 month post-op 262.6

Don't think so much! It's nor good for your brain!dde1c

pre-surgery weight 325; surgery date 2/28/2013; surgery weight 307; 8 weeks past-op weight 281.4; 12 weeks post-op 274; 4 month post-op 266.2; 5 month post-op 262.6

This is hands down the best advice! Lol I've been up late not sleeping thinking, thinking, thinking!

Deedadumble, goals yes I don't think anything as lofty as those though I'm lazy

I went hiking this weekend though and I felt great.....

Chelenka beat me to it....all or nothing thinking....most of us have it. It helped us get here. But it can derail your efforts so easily. You say you HAVE to reach a certain weight or BMI or you're a failure. That's all or nothing. It's not about success or failure. It's about improving your life, and you certainly have done that. You can strive to imrove even more, nothing at all wrong with that. We all keep striving. But you know as well as I...there is no finish line. There is no top of the mountain. Keep climbing but enjoy the view because you've already come farther than you ever thought you would. I'm proud of you.

Chelenka beat me to it....all or nothing thinking....most of us have it. It helped us get here. But it can derail your efforts so easily. You say you HAVE to reach a certain weight or BMI or you're a failure. That's all or nothing. It's not about success or failure. It's about improving your life' date=' and you certainly have done that. You can strive to imrove even more, nothing at all wrong with that. We all keep striving. But you know as well as I...there is no finish line. There is no top of the mountain. Keep climbing but enjoy the view because you've already come farther than you ever thought you would. I'm proud of you.[/quote']

The first thing I thought of when I read this??

THEN WHY DO WE HAVE THE f**king TICKERS!

Wait do you guys all have tickers?

My life has gotten so much better... I think I need to start living it more, and not wait for 28 more pounds...

I have a ticker but I haven't moved it in 5 months. But I've still made gains in other areas.

I have a ticker but I haven't moved it in 5 months. But I've still made gains in other areas.

Like your stars and stripped shorts?

Sorry couldn't resist

You've come so close though.. I'm still quite I bit out. But you were right in what you told me a little while ago, I'm not done, I'm still in the early stages in the grand scheme of things..

I had a fantasy of posting that "goal" thread at one year out... I think I've been seeing the months fall in on me lately, getting closer and all movement here has stopped so its put me in a panic.

It's funny I the beginning I wanted the six months at goal thing. I knew soon after I would not be one of those. So I put a year. But in the back of my mind I thought I was going to easy on myself.

Now I need to reevaluate again.

Wow forgive my rambling!

I want to know what you guys feel about your personal goals..

If anyone is still out there!

Personal goals ? Aim for the stars. If you not make it, Keep trying. One thing I have learned is we are only limited by the efficiency of our own feedback loop. Turn off any negativity and embrace the positive. And positive things will happen to you.

You know I don't know whether to send you a hug or throttle you! How many times have you given the advice to take things slow and steady' date=' work the sleeve and it will work for you? [/quote']

Read this again. You know you are right. I need to suck up this self indulgent whining. Do what o need to do. And let it be what is going to be.

Thanks.

We all have our moments, there were so many times that I believed that I'm the only one that could possibly feel a certain way... Then a lovely lady, who more often than not, seems to have it all locked down and under complete control, shares that she too has struggles and doubts.

Sharing these experiences make it easier for others to share and relate. I no longer feel as though I'm the only who goes through these weight related internal dramas. Sharing when you feel at your weakest gets us all to rally.. And really, what good is a site like this if we can't be there for one another.

Laura, it's always a pleasure reading your posts.. they give me a reality check, comedy break and a kick in the a** if needed (sometimes all in one post!)

Thanks for sharing all of it, it is appreciated more than you know.