One Possible Future for Newbies (long)
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Hi.
This is a message for all the newbies and want-to-be-newbies out there. Just a little message from a 9.5 month Bandster. I won't say I am a veteran - I am still a relative newbie myself. It's a long term process - learning how to eat like a normie.
I wanted to make sure that everyone is aware that living with the band is a unique process - different for each individual. Some people drop huge amounts of pounds right off the bat and then slow down. That has not been the case for me. Here is my tale....
After a long and arduous battle with my insurance company - during which I was a model citizen, eating better, exercising and spending countless hours on LBT, I finally got the Golden Ticket - Insurance approval. I had my consult with my surgeon and started the pre-op diet. I had been and continued to be "Gung Ho" for the lap band.
In the first week of February, I lost 16 lbs prior to and I had my surgery on the 6th. I gained the usual water/surgery weight - and I was not distressed because I was well prepared by my surgeon and my Band Buddies for this temporary gain. The Water weight dropped off, I healed up and I was on my way. For me, the liquids in the first week were easy... for about 4 days. After that, I was hungry. I went to mushies at the earliest possible moment and that was better. I could eat a lot of mushies. But I was told that solids would be better - that I would start to feel the effects of having the band.
I found that once I started eating solid foods I was able to eat anything and everything. I had none of this "restriction" you hear people talk about. I had to eat more slowly and chew my food - but everything passed right through the band. I was told by one and all that it was ok - I just had to heal up and that restriction could not be expected until after the first fill. I accepted this with as much patience as I could muster and proceeded to eat everything in sight - just because I could, and because I thought that after that magical fill, I would not be able to do that any more. I relaxed and enjoyed every bite.
After the 6 weeks of healing time, I scurried off to the fill center to get my first fill. I found that I had actually gained a half pound since the surgery - but being a philosophical and somewhat realistic person, I knew that based on my eating behaviors for the last 2-3 weeks, it was a miracle I hadn't gained back the entire 16 lbs I lost prior to surgery. Apparently - (and thank God) slowing down was helpful in and of itself.
The fill process was expertly done under the fluoroscope - and I made sure not to freak myself out by looking at the needle (to this day, I have never looked at the needle. I don't want to know). I trundled along home and did liquids for 1 day, mushies for 1 and then soft foods. For the first day or so, I had a glimpse of what restriction could be. It was glorious - after only a small portion, I was quite happy to stop eating. This was what it was all about. Of course, once the swelling went down - I was back to what seemed to be no restriction. I was careful about chewing - but I could still eat anything. I continued to relax and enjoy.
I did get back to the gym - and frankly, that was the only thing I did right for the first several months. I found that, since I was eating more slowly, I did fill up faster. I did eat less. This didn't help me make any better choices about what I ate - but it kept me from eating as I had before. I found that, while eating pretty much anything I wanted, I was losing weight. Slowly losing - but losing. I had lost all traces of my prior "Gung Ho" attitude. I was just living my life and eating what I wanted - which was less than I had wanted before the surgery. A while down the road, I had another fill - with much the same results - a couple of days of restriction and then the swelling went down.
With continued exercise and some sporadic motivation to eat properly, I lost a few more pounds. Needless to say - my Surgeon was less than ecstatic about my progress. With a starting BMI of nearly 60, I was expected to lose many many pounds right away. I was screwing up his curve. So, off to the fill center I went to get yet another fill. With much the same results as before. Now, each fill was making me a little more restricted - just a little - and each fill made me slow down a little bit more. Over the first 9 mos I got 4 fills and lost 27 lbs on my doctor's scale in addition to the 16 lbs I had lost prior to the surgery for a total of 43 lbs. It was very gradual, very comfortable.
People were starting to notice that I had lost weight. (when you start near 350 - it takes folks a while to notice). My clothes all fit again and I was starting to be able to walk without any knee pain. I was happy with the overall result. I figured it would take me about 3 yrs to get where I want to be - but that would be ok. I thought maybe I just didn't understand the concept of restriction and that maybe this slowing down and chewing was going to be all that I got. It was working - slowly - so I was ok with that. Even on days when I didn't care and ate everything, I didn't gain weight. It was ok. My life was not dramatically changed - nobody thought I was eating strangely or asked me anything other than the standard "what are you doing" type of questions. I had no side effects - I have had a total of one PB - and that because I was eating very dense bread, walking, talking and not chewing first thing in the AM when I had the best restriction. So, basically, except for the fact that I was losing a few pounds a month, my life was the same as it ever had been. And that was good.
I thought I had pretty good restriction and that I was making some important strides in getting my eyes and my mind to adjust to what my pouch could now hold. But my surgeon (bless him!) knew that I still didn't have restriction and basically insisted that I go in for yet another fill. I resisted a little - cause I worry about erosion and - on some level - I don't want my life to change,... despite knowing that it must if I am ever to lose the weight and keep it off. But, in the end, I went in for the fill. Per my doc's instructions, I went in the late afternoon - since I have restriction in the morning - but none at night.
Now - after 9.5 mos and 8.2 cc's in my Vanguard band - I have the restriction you hear folks talking about... even now after the swelling is down. I eat much less than I did at the beginning of this month. Even at dinner, I eat and I fill up quickly - in fact, I have to stop and I am uncomfortable if I take one bite too many.
So now, after 9.5 mos - I have to start following the rules... Protein first, sip water all day except during meals, test each bite and keep on exercising. Does perfect restriction help me choose to eat the correct healthy foods? Nope. I still have to do that part myself. But, I broke the 300 pound barrier on my scale at home yesterday and I am still dancing around like a maniac in my mind after 24 hours. What I have now is renewed hope and motivation to eat better. It was no problem to get my protein in when I could eat anything I wanted. Now, I have to pay attention - and I couldn't be happier about it.
Now, some folks might say that I had endured a trial - had a less than satisfactory Band experience - and I am finally going to get what I paid for. I don't feel that way at all. For me, I think this was the best possible way it could have come down. I don't adjust quickly - I don't like drama - I like change to come at me slowly. So the fact that I had 9.5 mos of gradually increasing restriction was perfect - for me. For you, it might be different.
The Point of this very long post is to let all of you know that at some point, restriction comes to us all. Even if it takes 5 fills - or 6 or 7 - someday it will come. Do not despair. Most of all, don't give up. I was lucky - because in my dark moments when I felt despair I could console myself with the fact that my insurance company had made the biggest financial investment. Even if I never lost any more weight, I wasn't out too much. For those who have spent the thousands out of pocket - it would be much more distressing to think that maybe it was just another diet con. So, don't think that. Because it isn't. It isn't a Quick Fix, either. It is a long-term investment in our personal health. We still have to decide to eat lean chicken instead of cheese sauce. We still have to drag our butts up off the couch and move. But, the hardest part, the eating less part, gets easier with every fill.
So, if you are considering this surgery, or have recently had it - GO FOR IT. I believe it to be the best decision I have ever made. Has it been all rosy and perfect? Well, yes, at least from my point of view. Has it been Instant Gratification? Not so much. But that isn't why I got this particular surgery.
Just a thought to keep in mind as we travel down the path of life with the band. Every body is different. Every experience is different. You are a unique individual with unique talents and beauty. Try not to judge your progress on the progress of others. In this case, it really IS all about you.
Hugs and Love