What did you tell your kids ? Or did you? I have a 11 year old, 4 and 11mo and before surgery I need to know if should say what doing or say goodbyes .. However feel like goodbye is little much bc I don't feel like going to die... So I think my 11 yr old knows but should I ask if he has questions? What do I say to 4 yr old?

I told all of mine. All girls, ages 17,15,13,& 8. With the exception of the 8 year old, felt they were all old enough to 'get it,' emotionally. The 8 year old, I explained and told her what I was doing and she was fine.

I know everyone has different opinions on this, but I believed it was what was best for us.

The odd side to this, I still haven't told anyone else (my husband and one friend only) ..including my own mother. Lmao.

I was not going to tell my children anything. They were just going to spend the night at my parents house and be none the wiser. At least that was the plan. However, my 5 year old over heard my mom tell my dad that I was going to have surgery in a couple of weeks. My dh started crying and saying she couldn't live without me and she didn't want me to have a surgery. I knew she might we worried about me, but I wasn't expecting this reaction (which was why I wasn't going to say anything, I don't want to worry her).

It's a tough call. Maybe you could explain it to the older child, but the younger one might get scared for you and worry. At least that was my experience. Good luck on the surgery and a speedy recovery.

What did you tell your kids ? Or did you? I have a 11 year old, 4 and 11mo and before surgery I need to know if should say what doing or say goodbyes .. However feel like goodbye is little much bc I don't feel like going to die... So I think my 11 yr old knows but should I ask if he has questions? What do I say to 4 yr old?

Well I have an adult daughter, so of course no problem for me. She's very supportive even though she didn't necessarily agree with my decision. I would think your 11 yr old would have a much better understanding. 11 yr. olds are smarter than you think sometimes so I think being honest with the oldest will help them to deal much better. You probably don't have to explain all that medical jargon but just tell them mommy's getting weight loss surgery to be healthier and I can be around a lot longer for you all. Now the 4 yr. old, to me, is just a baby. They will notice mommy getting smaller but I think trying to explain weight loss surgery to a 4 y/o shouldn't be something you should consume yourself with. And you don't have to say goodbye, just let them know you'll be away for a couple days but coming right back home to them.

My kids are 8 and 5. I didn't tell them. I felt it was too much and I didn't need them to worry about something completely out of their control. I said goodbye and that I loved them like any other time.

I have an 11 and 16 year old and they both were part of the discussion when my husband and I

Finalized my plans to go through with the surgery.

They were able to voice their concerns and asked questions it helped because they didn't like the idea at first but after I answered their questions they were on board!

With your 11 year old I think definitely ask if he has questions the 4 year old I would not tell very much. Just general info as to why you will be gone.

I have 8 and 10 year old girls. My surgery is scheduled for 3/11 and I have told both of them that I am having surgery. I didn't go into detail, only explained that they are going to remove part of my stomach so that daddy can be skinny! That was enough for both of them and because I presented it with enthusiasm and am excited whenever we talk about it, they are getting excited for the big day. No one else knows except my wife and two of my close co-workers.

Thank you all for your input.

My kids are 3,7,7,10 and they all know and could care less lol. They just want to see the "holes" like mommy had on her stomach, as my wife has already had hers.

I didn't tell my 8 year old. Well, I mentioned it a good while before it even happened, but he got really nervous and worried. When it came right down to it, hubby and my mom told him I was "at work". I work 3rd shift and go to school so he's not surprised when I am gone odd hours. He was none the wiser and I think I saved him some anxiety.

-Kendra

I will be having surgery in a few weeks and i don't planning on telling my kids until they are old enough to understand. They are 5,5, and 7.

I have a 4 year old too and I was honest with him. I told him Mommy had to have some surgery on her stomach and that I would be at the hospital for a couple of days, but they would take very good care of me and that I would be back very soon all fixed up.

He didn't even seem to worry. My husband brought him to the hospital each day to visit me too. He was fine with it. I believe honesty is the best policy on this one. Not all the details but just honesty. We (hubby and I) didn't want him to think that going to the hospital is a bad thing. We want him to know that the hospital is where you get better so he wouldn't be scared if he ever had to go himself.

Also, my hubby had the same procedure 12 weeks after I did, so our son was very comfortable with the situation when it was Daddy's turn.

I would let them know that the dr is going to fix your tummy and you're going to have a bandaged boo boo that needs to be taken care of. That why they'll understand about being gentle around your surgery area. Word it age appropriately for each of them.

I have a 6 and 3 year old and don't plan on telling them. They will be at a friends house overnight.