Today my surgery date was set. September 18, 2012 will be the first day of the rest of my life as they say. I am very thankful for this forum! I am amazed at the mountains of information I have found just i the last two hours.

I am a diabetic. ( oral meds) I have sleep apnea. I also have Barretts esophagus. For those who do not know what this is it is a pre cancerous state of the esophagus from prolonged acid reflux. My triglycerides are 563.

I have about 65 to 80lbs to lose. My endo doc and my gastro doctor have told me its imparative that I lose weight. Its been very very frustrating. I have tried many diets to no avail.

I have a concern I am going to throw out here to all of you. I am VERY afraid that I may sabatage my own success. Not sure if this makes sense to anyone out there but I have always cared and done for everyone else in my life.. ie my husband parents and children and friends. I have always put others before myself. It's very difficult for me to ask for help or to be center stage so to speak.

Tonight my husband and I talked and I was so very suprised at how supportive he was and intends to be. Our insurance has a Bariatric exclusion so we are paying cash for this procedure. I told him I feel guilty that I have not been able to lose this weight on my own in the last two years. I cried and he told me he loved me and he wants me around for another 25 or more years and Im worth any amount of money that it takes to help keep me here.

He made me feel so much better but I asked him not to tell everyone because I really can not handle people negative opinions. Is that the wrong type of attitude to go into this with? Should I be standing up and telling everyone?

Anyway this newbie thanks those of you that have shared their experiances. I will be watching and learning! Thanks for taking the time to read my some what neurotic post!

So glad your husband is supportive of you in this endeavor. My husband and I had a very similar talk. He felt bad because I have helped him in so many ways and he feels helpless to help me with my issues. Having that support behind you...it's priceless. You tell who you want to tell and in your own time. The great thing about this board is that you get to read a lot of different experiences. My surgery date is 9/15, so we'll be pretty close together!

Hi Peggy!

I am so happy for you that you have such a supportive husband. You put tears in my eyes. Everyone deserves to have someone love them that much.

I feel the same way about not telling anyone. In my opinion this is your personal business and you get to chose to tell the world or not one soul (although I wouldnt recommend that...it would make for a horrible recovery).

I wish you the best of luck and hope to see amazing results after October for you!!!

You will improve your health by leaps & bounds with VSG, don't be scared. I am so happy that you have such a wonderful relationship with your husband. This surgery is very personal & if you don't want to tell anyone about it, then don't. You can always change your mind if you chose to. If you want to talk about it, come to this website where you are surrounded by supportive friends going through the same thing. Good luck!

My insurance covers it and my husband is supportive, but I STILL feel guilty because I've been unable to lose the weight myself. It's not rocket science, what's my problem?

Well anyway, my surgery is tomorrow and I have such mixed emotions. Excited to lose weight FINALLY but not at all excited to go through this.

I finally told some close friends/family on Sunday. Til then, nobody knew except my husband. I figure if I have trouble accepting it, I don't need anyone else's two cents.

Good luck!

Welcome Peggylou! You have come to the right place to ask about these emotions. Look around, there are many of us not sure if we should tell others. I, myself, am scared to death to tell my mom. I just 'came out' to my sister and she was very supportive which was a relief. My mom has been overweight as long as I can remember and won't consider it for herself, so not sure how she will handle her daughter getting it done. I'm 39 years old and don't want to tell my mommy! Lol. But I know if I don't tell her and she finds out later, she will be extremely hurt.

What it comes down to is, tell everyone, no one or a select few. It's your business. No one else's. I just saw an episode of "Say Yes To The Dress" and the bride lost 115 lbs since the dress was ordered. There is no way she did it without wls in the 8 months it takes to order a wedding dress. But it wasn't stated so it's her secrete. I am a teacher and am in 3 different schools. In my one school I am only going to tell the nurse just in case of emergency. Most of the teachers there are all skinny minis and couldn't relate. In my second school I am sharing more because the art teacher had the lap band done in November and the reading teacher had the sleeve at the end of June. She announced it to everyone because she will be a lot thinner at the start of the school year and she rather not be fuel for the gossips. My third school I am just telling a few that I know that also had wls just for someone to talk to.

Best of luck deciding what is best for you. Not easy, I know but definately not a reason to not get yourself the help you need in getting yourself healthier. Keep posted on your journey!

Thank you all so much for your kind words. Okay I have a vain question! How many people lose some of their hair? Is there a way I can prevent this?

Thank you all for your kind comments. I am excited! I have the typical apple shape. Long skinny legs. Thin arms. Im all belly and boobs. This weight has really started to make my feet and knees hurt.

I have a stupid question. I have 75 lbs to lose. Will my body know when to stop losing weight? I see some people here have lost 160 to 200 pounds.