Yesterday was an emotional day for me...... have had a lot of those since being sleeved. I had been crying pretty much all day if I wasn't crying I was pissed off (seems to happen every couple of days for me). I know getting the sleeve was the best thing I could do for MYSELF but I still have the food emptiness syndrome sometimes especailly around dinner time. So basically I was pissed at the world yesterday because "NO ONE UNDERSTANDS how I feel" and I couldn't invite anyone to my pitty party because everyone that came into contact with me ran the other way...LOL So last night I had to pick my son who is 15 from practice at school. Which normally involves him coming straight out to the car but yesterday was different. I got there at 5:30, still very very emotional, and sat there and sat there and sat there. The old me would have sat there until dark if he hadn't come because the old me couldn't walk that hill to get to the fields without huffing and puffing getting embarrassed starting to sweat then have anxiety over sweating because everyone sees the fat woman sweating, so I sweat even more. I even chose to miss some of his football games this fall because I was so embarrassed of myself, which was very hard for me because I am my kid's biggest FAN!! I had always been to every football, basketball, baseball, school event ( I was PTSA treasurer) the kids ever had. Though last year I took a turn for the worse and had gain so much weight that it turned me into a hermit. I had put on 60lbs in a blink of an eye. Well back to the story, I decided the only way he was going to come was to get him and I thought oh I am going to blast him for not coming to the car. So I walked up the hill NOT A HUFF NOT A PUFF no sweat and it was like the angels began to sing and all the built up emotion of being pissed and embarrassed all went away because I did it. I walked up that hill. Now I have been walking since I have been out of the hospital usualy up to a mile a day but never noticed a differnece until yesterday. I couldn't believe how great I felt. When I got to the courts I sat down and enjoyed watching him practice. Neverminded the time.....

This is my 2nd week Post Op and well I've only lost 26 lbs but my body feels like I've lost a 100. I am capable of walking and standing for long periods of time without every part of my body hurting. I woke up this morning so grateful of this blessing and I know there will be those "Emotional Days" for me still but nothing is more emotional then living my life like it is suppose to be:)

Yesterday was an emotional day for me...... have had a lot of those since being sleeved. I had been crying pretty much all day if I wasn't crying I was pissed off (seems to happen every couple of days for me). I know getting the sleeve was the best thing I could do for MYSELF but I still have the food emptiness syndrome sometimes especailly around dinner time. So basically I was pissed at the world yesterday because "NO ONE UNDERSTANDS how I feel" and I couldn't invite anyone to my pitty party because everyone that came into contact with me ran the other way...LOL So last night I had to pick my son who is 15 from practice at school. Which normally involves him coming straight out to the car but yesterday was different. I got there at 5:30, still very very emotional, and sat there and sat there and sat there. The old me would have sat there until dark if he hadn't come because the old me couldn't walk that hill to get to the fields without huffing and puffing getting embarrassed starting to sweat then have anxiety over sweating because everyone sees the fat woman sweating, so I sweat even more. I even chose to miss some of his football games this fall because I was so embarrassed of myself, which was very hard for me because I am my kid's biggest FAN!! I had always been to every football, basketball, baseball, school event ( I was PTSA treasurer) the kids ever had. Though last year I took a turn for the worse and had gain so much weight that it turned me into a hermit. I had put on 60lbs in a blink of an eye. Well back to the story, I decided the only way he was going to come was to get him and I thought oh I am going to blast him for not coming to the car. So I walked up the hill NOT A HUFF NOT A PUFF no sweat and it was like the angels began to sing and all the built up emotion of being pissed and embarrassed all went away because I did it. I walked up that hill. Now I have been walking since I have been out of the hospital usualy up to a mile a day but never noticed a differnece until yesterday. I couldn't believe how great I felt. When I got to the courts I sat down and enjoyed watching him practice. Neverminded the time.....

This is my 2nd week Post Op and well I've only lost 26 lbs but my body feels like I've lost a 100. I am capable of walking and standing for long periods of time without every part of my body hurting. I woke up this morning so grateful of this blessing and I know there will be those "Emotional Days" for me still but nothing is more emotional then living my life like it is suppose to be:)

Awww, (((Deb)))!! Isn't that just the most amazing feeling!?! To know that you CAN do whatever you like, need or want to do. I remember feeling like Rocky Balboa the first time I walked around the lake in my apartment complex and the first time I walked from one end to the other of the mall without having heart failure! You go girl! THAT is what it's all about. We take our lives back instead of giving them to the fat and letting ourselves die a slow, painful, ever-less-satisfying death.

Congrats!! You've earned that NSV!!!

Thank you so much Lisa! Hitting the love button on the "We take our lives back instead of giving them to the fat and letting ourselves die a slow, painful, ever-less-satisfying death."

Oh Lawd can I ever relate to the anxiety and sweating! I've avoided being outside or in close quarters for almost three years now. Sweat, get anxious, sweat more, get panicky and embarrassed and bring on the flood. Your NSV gives me hope. Thank you!

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So glad to see the changes in you ... there is more to come. You did a wonderful thing for yourself and your health!

Wow, Deb, very inspiring. I can relate on so many levels. Being 9 days post op, although I am missing the food, I am happy to be gaining the emotional time to think about something other than what I am gonna eat next.

Deb, you are doing great...This is a very physically, mentally and emotionally engaging journey....

Do me a favor, take the word ONLY from in front of your weight loss.... you are doing AMAZING!!! 26 lbs is a great loss... and it gets better!!!!

Enjoy your journey!!!

Whooz I am so glad to hear that.....

Favor thank you so much for you kind words....your right I will!

Your story hit a nerve with me, and a memory came back. I am preop right now, surgery date is tentatively 4/23 - my husband was sleeved March 2011.

Anyway, 3 years ago this August was my 25th wedding anniversary. The family was planning a party for us. They decided to do an outside event. As soon as I heard that, I got anxiety. Being the center of attention, in the heat, with all my fatness on display? I would be a sweaty mess. I couldn't do it. No thank you. I came up with an idea - I told everyone we really didn't want a party and that my husband was taking me away for a long weekend in celebration. We did go away overnight, but that wasn't the point. I really wanted a party. My fat stole from me what would have been a wonderful moment in my life yet again. I'm so done. Thank you for reminding me that I am absolutely 100% doing the right thing.

I knew that I wasn't the only one that felt like that but I was the only one I knew that did and couldn't tell people except fo my husband about that anxiety. Thanks Joni for sharing your story.....and I know you will be glad when 4/23 gets here so that you too can experience the sleeve.

And what is this "only lost 26lbs"?? - that is a whole lot of weight my dear! It wouldn't be I "only gained 26lbs" would it???

Don't be hard on yourself!! You made a positive decision to change your life and every pound and NSV counts towards that goal to be healthy!!