Sorry about the length of this one.

The week is coming to an end and I think I may have found a ounce of hope hidden behind my heart. My grandkids have been very concerned with grandma and worried because I was crying alot. So last night my 4 year granddaughter came to me and said to me please don't cry anymore I will happy you find hope it will be okay. To tell you the truth she made me cry even more. Then she gets her brothers and tells them that I am crying because I lost my hope and the 5 year old tell her and the 6 year old that I didn't lose hope because she was in school yesterday. I started to laugh and the 6 year old tells them that they should come to my room and tell me that I could have some of their hope, and again I started to cry. So I step back away from the door and thought about what they were talking about and about an hour later while we sat to eat dinner they asked if they could give me something to make me feel better and I told them yes to my surprise they handed me a little bottle fill with glitter it had three colors. While everyone watch them the 6 year year old said, " Because you show us so much love and caring we want you to stop crying and give you some of our hope. My color is silver, I.O.'s color is gold and nena's color is purple." We love you grandma.

There was not a dry eye at the table. My friend says to me I see you rubbed off on them. Because I have a few of those bottles too.

With that I went to bed thinking about what to do, so I said in the morning I will stop the crying and take some actions.

I email the neuro doctor and told him what happen and stated that we need to do something about my ICS in the brain so I could get the surgery.

He called me and we spoke he stated that I was okay to have the surgery and why didn't I have the anesthiologist he requested to assisted the surgeon. He then called the doctor and told him that the ICS is in the brain and they don't do anything for it at this stage and please use the anesthiologist he recommened to assist because he is know the case and how to handle it.

So I will be a May sleever. I will continue the high Protein diet because since monday I have not been able to really eat much.

Lilu!!!!! :hug: May will be here before you know it! Your grandkids are the best!