Hello everyone. I've been meditating on my weight loss journey today. My doctor said his goal for me was 134 lbs and I was like yeah right. I will be happy if I make it to 150 which is what I weighed in high school. As of yesterday, I'm now 144 and I thought my scale was playing a trick on me. So I weighed in today and sure enough, I weighed in at 144.8 lbs the exact weight from yesterday. I'm not saying this for kudos or anything I'm saying this because I remembered what my doctor's goal was for me at that moment this morning and now I realize well that's only 10 more pounds. First of all, I'm still trying to process the fact that I'm 144 and I'm not even trying to lose. I just am. The band is really doing it's thing here. So what I'm feeling right now at this moment, is SCARED!!!!!! I can't explain it I just feel like I don't want to be that small but then I do. I don't even remember being this weight I imagine in junior high but me, 134 pounds???? Are you freaking serious????!!!!!!! I don't know maybe I'm stressing for no reason but I just can't grasp this right now. I guess because I have been so used to being big, I don't know what it feels like to be small and for that reason I'm scared. Thanks for listening.

Well that very brave for u to say , but u should be proud of ur self but I kinda know what ur going thru. I know this may sound dumb but I remember losing 50 pounds at one time and I looked at my face and started thinking I'm to skinny I can't look like this . I actually want to gain weight again cause I wasn't use to seeing my self like this.. Unfortunately I did gain weight again. I know I can't handle the way I look now.. I was just woundeing has anyone else here that has hit faze where u were almost scared to see that skinny person inside come out?? And again congratulations on ur weight lost !!!

I was just woundeing has anyone else here that has hit faze where u were almost scared to see that skinny person inside come out??

Good question. Can anyone else out there relate to this or am I just crazy?????

Absolutely, I can't imagine being skinny ever! I have been overweight all my life! I remember getting my school physical to enter kindergarten (that was too many years ago lol), I weighed 89 pounds in first grade. The doctor told my mother I should be half that weight. So, my weight kept going up no matter how hard I tried. Anyway, as an adult I once lost a significant amount of weight. I was still overweight but men started noticing me and I literally got scared because men had never paid attention to me. All of a sudden I was getting noticed and it scared me. I should have been happy but I was raised by very over protective parents so my mother would lecture me on being careful when a man pays attention to you that most only wanted one thing so I guess I was afraid. Anyway, I stopped losing weight because I was fearful of what was expected of me. Fortunately, I finally met someone who loved me no matter what and we got married. I was comfortable in my own skin but did try to lose weight and got married and had 3 children with this man. Then he died suddenly at age 40. I was left with 3 small children. I dated after one year and the fear came back. I felt if I stayed heavy I wouldn't have to worry about men going after me. I'm disabled so I figured no man would want me being overweight and having a disability. Well, I was wrong. Men were interested in me but I was afraid to commit to anyone because I doubted myself and really lacked confidence. Then I met Michael who loved me for me skinny or fat. He took the fear out of me and I've known Michael since 1988. We have been an item since 1998 and he is my rock. Anyway, the point is I cannot imagine myself thin. The lowest weight I've been as an adult was 178. So to go below 178 is going to be a stretch for me. My doctor would be happy if I get down to 150. I can't imagine it but then again, I can imagine it. The fear may set in again, the fear may set in again when I go below 178.

I think it is good that you are aware of your fear and vocalizing it, which minimizes the power on your psyche. In the past, my "fear" would actually lead me to derail my own success. With the band, I have more control over what I eat, and it gives me more time to grapple with negative feelings and to get past them.

Whether we acknowledge it or not, fat layers do provide us a barrier between ourselves and others, even ourselves and the world at large. Personally, I felt a heavier weight "grounded" me; made me more "stable" and protected. Like I was afraid I would float away at a lower weight or something! Irrational, yes, but coming to terms with that has made me much more powerful in my own right. With less emphasis on my body, I spend more time looking inward. And I like that!

Even though not many have replied here yet, I bet there are many, many of us who understand how you feel. Congrats on your success and to breaking through those scary feelings and settling into "you."

I have found with the band, from my experience, that you can set goals and that's a good thing...

BUT this is not a diet where you can turn it on or off, start or stop when you feel like it...this is SURGERY and because of that fact my lifestyle has changed forever...in other words, the way I eat and what I eat and how much I eat will forever be changed.....

MY Dr. explained to me that, with that in mind, plus throw in normal physical activity...my body will stop loosing when It feels like it wants to stop loosing...

I was fat because I ate abnormally, now that I am eating, etc, as a normal person once again, my body will also return to a normal condition (weight) which I can say it has done....way beyond the goals that I set for myself.....

I have not gained or list any weight in well over a year now,...my body reaching that point of balance...equilibrium...from normal eating and physical activity....unlike the abnormal eating habits, and laziness I used to exhibit.

Of course, if you're dieting, then like any other diet you can choose to stop - cheat..at any time...thus failing like I have done with 100's of diets I have attempted over the last 35 years.....

Hello everyone. I've been meditating on my weight loss journey today. My doctor said his goal for me was 134 lbs and I was like yeah right. I will be happy if I make it to 150 which is what I weighed in high school. As of yesterday' date=' I'm now 144 and I thought my scale was playing a trick on me. So I weighed in today and sure enough, I weighed in at 144.8 lbs the exact weight from yesterday. I'm not saying this for kudos or anything I'm saying this because I remembered what my doctor's goal was for me at that moment this morning and now I realize well that's only 10 more pounds. <img src='http://www.bariatricpal.com/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/huh.png' class='bbc_emoticon' alt='' /> First of all, I'm still trying to process the fact that I'm 144 <img src='http://www.bariatricpal.com/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/blink.png' class='bbc_emoticon' alt='' /> and I'm not even trying to lose. I just am. The band is really doing it's thing here. So what I'm feeling right now at this moment, is SCARED!!!!!! <img src='http://www.bariatricpal.com/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/sad.png' class='bbc_emoticon' alt='' /> I can't explain it I just feel like I don't want to be that small but then I do. I don't even remember being this weight I imagine in junior high but me, 134 pounds???? Are you freaking serious????!!!!!!! I don't know maybe I'm stressing for no reason but I just can't grasp this right now. I guess because I have been so used to being big, I don't know what it feels like to be small and for that reason I'm scared. <img src='http://www.bariatricpal.com/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/mellow.png' class='bbc_emoticon' alt='' /> Thanks for listening.[/quote']

Omg I feel the SAME way! I'm under 140 now (fluctuate 137-139). It's a little scary to be in this "new territory" and so close to goal.

Hello everyone. I've been meditating on my weight loss journey today. My doctor said his goal for me was 134 lbs and I was like yeah right. I will be happy if I make it to 150 which is what I weighed in high school. As of yesterday' date=' I'm now 144 and I thought my scale was playing a trick on me. So I weighed in today and sure enough, I weighed in at 144.8 lbs the exact weight from yesterday. I'm not saying this for kudos or anything I'm saying this because I remembered what my doctor's goal was for me at that moment this morning and now I realize well that's only 10 more pounds. First of all, I'm still trying to process the fact that I'm 144 and I'm not even trying to lose. I just am. The band is really doing it's thing here. So what I'm feeling right now at this moment, is SCARED!!!!!! I can't explain it I just feel like I don't want to be that small but then I do. I don't even remember being this weight I imagine in junior high but me, 134 pounds???? Are you freaking serious????!!!!!!! I don't know maybe I'm stressing for no reason but I just can't grasp this right now. I guess because I have been so used to being big, I don't know what it feels like to be small and for that reason I'm scared. Thanks for listening.[/quote']

Omg!!!!! Thank you. So I'm not crazy after all. I really appreciate your story I totally understand.

Hello everyone. I've been meditating on my weight loss journey today. My doctor said his goal for me was 134 lbs and I was like yeah right. I will be happy if I make it to 150 which is what I weighed in high school. As of yesterday, I'm now 144 and I thought my scale was playing a trick on me. So I weighed in today and sure enough, I weighed in at 144.8 lbs the exact weight from yesterday. I'm not saying this for kudos or anything I'm saying this because I remembered what my doctor's goal was for me at that moment this morning and now I realize well that's only 10 more pounds. First of all, I'm still trying to process the fact that I'm 144 and I'm not even trying to lose. I just am. The band is really doing it's thing here. So what I'm feeling right now at this moment, is SCARED!!!!!! I can't explain it I just feel like I don't want to be that small but then I do. I don't even remember being this weight I imagine in junior high but me, 134 pounds???? Are you freaking serious????!!!!!!! I don't know maybe I'm stressing for no reason but I just can't grasp this right now. I guess because I have been so used to being big, I don't know what it feels like to be small and for that reason I'm scared. Thanks for listening.

dont be scared....you was....you were....you are and will always remain a most gorgeous woman.....no matter what the scale says..own it, no matter what the number says.

to be gorgeous, you must have a good heart and spirit and i know you have just that...and nope, not crazy..

Hello everyone. I've been meditating on my weight loss journey today. My doctor said his goal for me was 134 lbs and I was like yeah right. I will be happy if I make it to 150 which is what I weighed in high school. As of yesterday, I'm now 144 and I thought my scale was playing a trick on me. So I weighed in today and sure enough, I weighed in at 144.8 lbs the exact weight from yesterday. I'm not saying this for kudos or anything I'm saying this because I remembered what my doctor's goal was for me at that moment this morning and now I realize well that's only 10 more pounds. First of all, I'm still trying to process the fact that I'm 144 and I'm not even trying to lose. I just am. The band is really doing it's thing here. So what I'm feeling right now at this moment, is SCARED!!!!!! I can't explain it I just feel like I don't want to be that small but then I do. I don't even remember being this weight I imagine in junior high but me, 134 pounds???? Are you freaking serious????!!!!!!! I don't know maybe I'm stressing for no reason but I just can't grasp this right now. I guess because I have been so used to being big, I don't know what it feels like to be small and for that reason I'm scared. Thanks for listening.

I don't think 140 pounds is too small for your height, my niece is 5'0 and has never been over 125 pounds in the 40 years I've known her and she is far from skinny.

I am 5'7 and 140 would look dangerously too thin for me, for my build and bone structure...

Honestly, it's always better to get below goal "if possible", because LONG TERM -- it may not always be this easy to maintain your weight loss like this, and it may come a time where you'd wish you wre back at 140, trust me on this one.

Good luck and enjoy it, you look great!!!

I don't think 140 pounds is too small for your height' date=' my niece is 5'0 and has never been over 125 pounds in the 40 years I've known her and she is far from skinny.

I am 5'7 and 140 would look dangerously too thin for me, for my build and bone structure...

Honestly, it's always better to get below goal "if possible", because LONG TERM -- it may not always be this easy to maintain your weight loss like this, and it may come a time where you'd wish you wre back at 140, trust me on this one.

Good luck and enjoy it, you look great!!![/quote']

Aww thank u and so do u.