I was banded on Sept. 16, 2011. When I started my journey I was 361, at the day of surgery I was 330. I have been loosing consistanly until Thanksgiving. This was my first thanksgiving since the death of my mother last year and I was so sad and depressed. I stayed home because I couldn't stand to be with anyone and thier family, when I was missing my so much. Since then I have found myself popping things in my mouth, eating things I have been able to resist with no problem. I have just gotten to the point where I could not eat things I buy for my son. And here I am sabotaging myself after all this hard work.

Last week was her birthday and I spiraled back into that place. The 16th of this month marks the one year anniversary of her death. I am trying so hard not to go back to old habits but my saddness is so hard to shake and keep into perspective. I have even noticed my workouts are as intense as they used to be. I need help BADLY. I go tomorrow to see my surgeon and at thanksgiving I weighed in 304, I weighed myself today and I am 307. I wanted to be out of the 300's when I went to see him, well that's not going to happen.

If anyone has been here and can help, please do.

I have no experience in grief, so I cannot guide you in that department. I do know that I can pray for you. I am so sorry for your loss. ONe thing that is appearant is that you have done so well and you may be having a hard time during this time. Please give yourself a break and grieve! Definately come to these boards when the feeling of eating comes around and we will help you through it. Talk with friends, counselor, pastors as you will get through this WITHOUT sabatoging your weightloss. We are here for you!

Tira

My father passed away on Dec 22nd 2009. I can feel myself starting to slip into that old depression of two years ago and yes this includes wanting to eat. I am really not sure what to do but I know that one of his wishes was for me to quit smoking and lose the weight. I have done one and starting to do the other. I think thats all I can do is just remember that he was one of my biggest supporters so after myself and my son..I am doing this for him

I am sorry for your loss...I know how you feel. Its tough but we will get through this

All of us here on the boards are here for you. Come here as soon as you feel the depression starting and we will all try to help you through it. You've come SO far and can keep going strong! Its ok to grieve and be sad sometimes, just don't let it sabotage your weight-loss!

Prayers sent your way,

Good Luck!!

When you are tempted by those foods remember how they don't make you feel better they make you feel worse! You need to find a new coping mechanism besides food. Have tried grief counseling? This could benefit you greatly!

Thanks everyone, I appreciate all your words of encouragement. Today I went and worked out and felt a lot better. I am still very sad but i am trying real hard to deal with it in a different way besides food. I am reminding myself why I started this journey in the first place. It's really nice to have a place to come to for support and encouragement.

My Mother passed away a year ago also at the age of 87.

However, my sister died 2 years ago at the age if 64.

Also, my Brother passed away 4 years ago at the age of 60.

Both my brother and sister's death can be directly tied to being overweight, and none of it was very pretty.

So, when I went for my initial lap band consultation, the first question I was asked was "why do you want the surgery?"

And my answer was "because I don't want to die!"

At first,the Dr. Had a look of surprise, which then turned into a broad smile. He knew what I meant, and I then began a long conversation concerning my family history and my own comorbidities.

Whenever I need motivation, I think back on those things.

The amputations, infections, surgeries, dialysis 3 times a week, ans so on, and so on.

I then get on the treadmill and work it for all it's worth!

Very sorry for your loss and the pain you feel. I too lost my mom and my dad two years apart when I was in my early thirties. I am 55 now, so it was a long time ago. It will get better in time. Let yourself cry if you need to. But try to keep in mind this one thought." How is putting all the wrong foods in my mouth going to help me?" You have to work through the emotional eating and stop doing it. I'm sure your mom would want the best for you. And that means weighing less than 300 lbs. Over eating solves nothing and it certainly won't help your grief. Best of luck. We are all here for you. Just don't go for the food. Keep working out. It's the best anti depressant there is.

Arlene