~amy~

I'm freshly banded, too, and I have to say that I felt the same way you did. I got a little discouraged at first seeing how many people on this forum felt "great" after a few days, or when I saw this one guy posting from his room at the dang hospital!!! Why couldn't it be that easy for me?!! It's easy to throw a pity party when you're feeling alone and discouraged. Just know that you're not alone, and that this is only a means to an end - your goal weight!!! As for the advice - I can only say that I wish I had forced more Water, and started stool softeners earlier (I didn't know I had a problem until it was too late and had to go to the ER...I'm sure being a nurse, you're aware of what they do for an impaction). Not fun!! Let me know if you need a buddy - you can email me or PM me...I'll be happy to help any way I can!!

I can totally relate. My DH does the same thing. While I was on the pre-op liquid diet, he would come home with my favorite fast food and actually wave it in my face. He has the attitude of another poster - that it's not his problem, but mine...but he's actually more obese than I am. He says that I chose this and I need to learn to live with my decision. The problem I have with this reasoning is that it doesn't take into account what our marriage is supposed to represent....a TEAM. When one person makes a decision to do something better for herself, the other person should at least TRY to support that decision instead of intentionally trying to sabotage it, which is what I believe my DH is doing when he gets mad if I don't want to fix him ice cream in the evening. (HELLOOOOO, Don't you have legs???) My DH gets this honestly from his father...as he was the one who called several nights ago to "just let ya know I just had a huge bowl of chicken and dumplings and I'm working on my 2nd brownie right now. How do ya feel about that?" While I definitely wanted to slap the FIL, I take more offense to my DH's behavior because he's my partner, my team mate...and he's supposed to protect me from harm, not create more opportunities for it. This is not to say that I don't believe that I alone bear the most responsibility of anyone for my own decisions and weight loss. I know that I am the one who has to make the committment to stay away from unhealthy food, and I have no problem with that aspect of it. I just wish that decision didn't include having to stay away from my husband, too.

Congrats!! You're feeling better than I did at 5 days post op!! Woo hoo!! It should all be downhill from here!

Holy Cow!!! You're my hero!! I wasn't even CLOSE to being coherent enough to post IN ROOM (or for 3 days after surgery for that matter!!)

This is sooo true! I have a friend / former coworker who has actually succeeded in sabotaging every diet I've tried in the last 4 years. She's only about 25 lbs lighter than me, but I guess I was her "fat friend," and she didn't want to lose that security that she felt not being the biggest one in the room. Now that I'm no longer working with her, it's a lot easier for me to stay on track and not let her negativity affect my future!! I'm taking my life back for ME!!! The truth is....I am not the same person I used to be. I used to be very outgoing, athletic, and the life of every party. When I got fat, I turned inward, and became shy and insecure. And I sincerely hope to God, that my personality is affected by my weight loss. And if she can't deal with it, then she needs to go along her merry way... You've probably already seen this floating around via email, but I found it appropriate here...sorry for the length. Reason, Season, or Lifetime People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. When you figure out which one it is, you will know what to do for each person. When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty; to provide you with guidance and support; to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend, and they are. They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled; their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on. Some people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has come to share, grow or learn. They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it. It is real. But only for a season. LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons; things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person, and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant. — Unknown

Thanks - I have Miralax here for my little girl and I did give it a try that night (it was difficult to keep up with everything I tried that night). I was just too far gone for anything to work. The only thing is, I would caution against using Miralax, or any product too often b/c it is habit forming....I don't care what any doctor says. I know this first hand. If you use Miralax too often, your body forgets how to take care of business by itself, and requires the use of more product to get the job done. I was told to make sure to watch my diet and exercise (yeah, right! Post surgery -helloooo) and that I could drink warm, watered down prune juice daily if I started having other issues. So now, as a preventative measure, I have about 4 oz of prune juice mixed with 2 oz of Water, heated up - every morning instead of coffee or hot chocolate (as my nurse had originally recommended). The water cuts down on the horrible taste of straight prune juice, and I actually kind of like it now. Plus - prune juice is natural, and that makes me feel better about having it every day, even though it is pretty high in calories. Thanks again!!

April, I haven't cheated yet, but I can soooooo totally feel your pain!! I've come so close so many times!! And I'm still supposed to be on liquids. I say "supposed to be" because I've moved on to some thinned mushies. I can't drink the protein shakes because they make me ILL. I was only having about 300 calories a day and 0 protein. Not good. I'm in that freshly banded stage where you feel hungry, but there's no restriction at ALL!! I'm starving, and I've talked myself out of more meltdowns this week than ever in my life. So I can definitely empathize with you! I came up with a rule when I was on the pre-op liquid diet. If I wanted to cheat, I had to chant, OUT LOUD before I could take even the smallest of bites: "I'm a strong person and I can refrain!! I'm a strong person and I can refrain!! I'm a strong person and I can refrain!!" If I still wanted to cheat after that, I could. And guess what? I never cheated ONCE! Stay strong!! You can do this!!! :tongue_smilie:

I never, ever, ever thought I'd agree with a statement like this.....but alas! I do! :sad:

I'm down 2 more lbs, too! Woo hoo!! :frown: I'm at 231!

Wow! I just took a look at the spreadsheet - everybody's doing soooo great!! Woo hooo!!!! :frown: Way to go!!

This is an awesome idea!! What a great way to reward yourself for all the hard work! I would have never thought of buying a gift card - I would have just stuffed some money back with good intentions, and then spent it on bills or whatever else came up. A gift card is perfect! :frown:

Thanks everyone!! I am soooo much better! I have always struggled with mild constipation - since I was a little girl, but have never experienced anything like this! Unfortunately, it seems that this could be an on-going problem with the band. I hope that this thread may help others who hadn't expected it to be this serious. Every other thread I found explained problems, but very few solutions...and none of them explored the possibility of severe impaction - which could be fatal if left untreated for too long. So please keep the suggestions coming - they are sure to help someone else in the future!! Thanks again!! :sad: :frown:

Just to reiterate what others have said here, I was banded on 2-10, and I stalled for a few days too, this week. Due to some medical issues, I have now started losing again, but I was just told by my surgery nurse yesterday (we're neighbors - she was also banded 7 years ago and has kept the weight off), that any weight that I have lost before my first fill is BONUS weight. She said that my surgeon doesn't expect any weight loss until after the first fill, and in fact, a lot of people gain in those first weeks. So don't get down on yourself!! Give your body time to heal. The band can't really work properly until it's been filled. Then, as long as you make healthy choices and exercise, it should be smooth sailing for ya! :frown: Good Luck!! :sad:

My surgeon didn't have a program fee at all, and he offers a a dietician, in-house support group (in which he himself participates), and a blog/message board system where he and his wife (also a lap-band surgeon) post all kinds of helpful hints, recipes, exercise ideas, and general support. If a patient has a general question, he/she can post to the message board and will receive an answer (no actual medical advice, though - which is completely understandable). I don't get the vibe from them that they're just out to make a quick buck...they actually care about their patients, are very knowledgable, practice what they preach (good eating habits, exercise), and to me, that's what makes a good doctor. I think you have to trust your instincts about people. You said yourself that he was "very slick." That alone says to me that you don't completely trust him. And I wouldn't let any doctor near me unless I trusted him with my LIFE - which is what you'll be doing on surgery day. I'd say it was time to find somebody else. Good luck!!

This is absolutely horrifying! Sooo scary!! Prayers for your friend...thank goodness she has a friend like you to offer her support during this time! I agree with the previous poster - post this on EVERY forum you can find!!!

Oh goodness - that poor guy would have gotten an earful for sure if it had been me! I can't imagine being hit like that right now! I can relate to the post-bm weightloss, too!! I actually gained 5lbs over that whole process, but Saturday afternoon after I returned from the ER, I was back down 5 lbs!! Hallelujah!! I was starting to get upset with myself!! :redface:

Thanks - will definitely keep this in mind for future "experiences." :redface: Are gummies okay with the band? I'm only 10 days post op, so I'm still learning. :redface:

Although I'm freshly banded, and have no real advice for you - I can totally relate to the husband issue. My husband actually prefers me fat, I think. I think he has issues with me losing weight, and is afraid that I'll "get skinny and leave him." It started out like your situation, with him offering to get me this or that - but when I started my pre-op liquid diet, he knew that there was no turning back for me. That's when he started purposefully trying to sabotage me. He's on the Atkins diet (for like the 50th time in 10 years) because he likes to be able to eat as much as he wants. So he'll grill steaks and ACTUALLY WAVE THEM IN MY FACE!! His father does the same thing - he actually called me one night to inform me that he'd just eaten chicken and dumplings and "not one, but TWO brownies!" I want to scream! Weight loss is a mental thing for me anyway - and trying to play defense against those who love me makes it that much harder! What about exercise? Do you have an exercise regimen in place? I'm only 10 days post op, so I can't do very much right now, and that's hard for me. I find that when I'm exercising, I don't WANT that ice cream because it will be that much more that I have to work off in the gym. Good luck to you - prayers going up for you! :redface:

I think crzytchr hit the nail on the head. I, too, experienced painful swallowing until about day 2 or 3. I was told it was from the breathing tube. The Water is so important for so many reasons...I didn't drink enough b/c I was afraid of slipping my band. I got dehydrated and severely constipated. If I had to do it all over again - I would definitely drink and walk more! :redface:

I've added myself, too! Of course, I discovered that my home scale was not correct and that my starting weight was actually 240, so I'm trying to lose 25 instead of 20. Fortunately, I knocked out that first 5 lbs this past week! :redface:

My doc told me skim milk was okay to use with my shakes, but not to choose it any other time, which hasn't been difficult, as I HATE skim milk! :redface: As for your previous post about your concern as to whether 5 days would be enough time for you to be off work. For ME, I remember being 5 or 6 days post op, and wondering how on earth some of these folks were going back to work. I was soooo thankful that I stay home. I do homeschool, and I began doing that again on the 5th day, but I don't think I did a great job. I was still kind of woozy from the pain meds (beware of the pain meds - they cause constipation), and still felt like crap. On the other hand....other people seem to feel just fine after 2 or 3 days! Why couldn't I be one of those??!! lol...I think it just depends on how your body reacts to the surgery. For me, this surgery was the harder on me than my tubal or any other surgery I've had. For others, this surgery was easier. Everybody's different. Just listen to your body - and don't be afraid to ask your doc even the silliest of questions. Good luck!! :redface:

Thanks b, and Betsy...I do feel a lot better today, although I had some pretty horrifying nightmares last night! LOL...I hope to never have that experience again! :redface:

Oh - forgot to add - they had this at the 24 hour Walgreens in our town. I'm sure it would have worked if I hadn't been too far gone already. Thanks!

Thanks to everyone for your comments, support, and advice. I tried everything that was suggested here...no relief. Unfortunately, at 3:48 this morning, I made the decision to go to the ER. There was just soooo much pain! They took an x-ray, and said I was impacted; they were all in disbelief that my doc didn't tell me to start stool softeners immediately when I got home from surgery. (My doc just told me that if I 'FELT' constipated, I could start stool softeners/no laxatives - but by the time I actually "FELT" anything, it was too late.) Evidently, abdominal surgeries combined with pain meds and anesthesia cause severe constipation and should have started stool softeners immediately after surgery. Plus I was dehydrated, which didn't help matters. Dehydration - I was also told to only have a few sips of Water or broth for the first 3 days, and then I could start full liquids - only a few sips at a time. But come to find out, I could have been chugging that water after day 3, and it wouldn't have hurt the band (according to my surgeon's nurse). I was so afraid of slipping my band, that I didn't drink enough water in those first three days and I got pretty dehydrated. By the 8th day (I spoke to my nurse on day 7), the dehydration was less of an issue (although I still feel like I could chug a gallon of water 4 - 5 times a day). It was all due to a lack of understanding and communication on my part - I should have read through the post-op diet more carefully and cleared up even the silliest questions that I had - would have probably saved my bottom in the long run. Bowel Extraction - I have to say, the trip to the ER did the trick, but it was the single most painful (not to mention embarrassing, mortifying, and hideously disgusting) thing I have EVER experienced, and that's including 3 surgeries, and natural childbirth to 3 children. PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, if you're reading this and you're experiencing a similar problem, start stool softeners as early as humanly possible. Constipation IS normal, but you may not know that you have it right away. You can not wait it out - you will get impacted. And the doctor that I spoke with said that it was a myth that a liquid diet will produce no bowel movement...he said that you should still have SOMETHING, although not as often. So I should have started taking something about day 4 or 5. Instead, I didn't start worrying about it until I felt that I needed to go and couldn't (day 10). As for me now....I'm going back to bed b/c the pain from the extraction is so unbearable that I can't sit or stand. Please pray for me (and my bottom)!! :thumbup:

Thank you sooooo much! I'm gonna check that out. I sincerely hope that I will have some relief before it comes in though! With everything I've tried so far, I'm a little afraid of what's going to come AFTER the "experience" - I'm pretty sure that I'll have a major colon cleanse coming without buying the whole kit! Thanks again!