BetsyB

I'm not a rooftop-shouter, but I don't conceal it, either. I mean, it's not like I could conceal being morbidly obese. And it's not like I can conceal that I'm losing weight--more weight than I have in a very long time. To any observer, it's obvious that I'm eating differently. It's obvious something has changed dramatically; if people know that a gastric band is involved, it doesn't change ...well, anything. I made the decision to be open because a father of one of my son's friends told me about his surgery. He was banded a few years ago, and when I asked him how he had lost weight, he was fleetingly hesitant, and told me. And it made a huge difference for me when I was in the decision-making process. If I can make that kind of difference for anyone, it will be worth any momentary discomfort I might experience. (I figure anyone who would judge is already judging me--for being fat, for not losing before now, for [fill in the blank]. I am sure they will continue to judge long after I'm normal weight. They'll just have to come up with something more creative, like how long I let my grass get between mowings or how loud I play the music in my car.)

Every doctor has a different set of "rules." The best source for information is your own doctor or nutritionist. Were you given any kind of instruction? I weigh my Protein, and measure veggies. At each meal, I have 3-4 ounces of protein (meat, fish, poultry, or legumes). At one meal a day, I add 1/2 cup nonstarchy veggie. At another, I have a fruit. I won't add starches (other than legumes)/grains back in until I've lost at least 75 percent of my excess weight. My doctor's plan is obviously stricter than many---this is why it's a good idea to check with your own.

I think it can be kind of humbling to realize, "Hey, I can't do this on my own." But really, accepting help---in the form of surgery--is not a sign of surrender. Rather, it's taking CONTROL. It seems as though you are viewing it as some sort of defeat, and that negative self-talk is occupying too much space in your mind. That space could be put to far better use! You could, for example, begin practicing the things you'll need to do after surgery. If you're postponing doing positive until you feel better about yourself after surgery, you may be postponing for a very long time. The surgery is fabulous, but it won't flick a switch in your brain that tells you that it's time to feel good about yourself. All it will do is help manage your hunger. And it may not even do that very well for several months! It's a process--and it starts now. From now until the time you achieve good restriction, you will have to be in control of your actions. And having thoughts that are positive and better-aligned with success can only help you as you as you do so. I know that it's ridiculous to tell a person, "Buck up! Be positive!" if that person is not in a positive place. I understand that you're not there, and I'm sorry for your sadness and struggles. But it's not ridiculous to suggest that, if you're really struggling, it might be a good idea to find a good therapist who's skilled in dealing with weight issues. Get some good support and learn some new ways to cope with your feelings so that you can really engage in the activities you'll need to embrace in order to succeed with the band.

It is a slow road, but you know what, Ginger? You're doing really, really great. I know that stalls are frustrating beyond belief, but your loss has been greater than average, and your body likely is just thinking, "What the...?!" and regrouping before getting ready to drop a bunch more. I miss having a four-year-old! That is such a great age.

Insurance contracts are pretty specific about what they will and will not approve. If yours specified that you had to be above a 40 BMI for a specific time frame, then an appeal likely won't help. BUT, do read the contract carefully. It may make allowances if you have comorbidities---and your doctor might be able to make a case on that basis. Failing that, the place to go for help is your HR department. They renew insurance contracts annually, and they're the ones who are really holding the purse strings. If you ask (pressure!) them to make their coverage of bariatric surgery less exclusive, it can really make your life lots easier.

Well, to echo what others have said, you haven't gained 5 pounds of fat. It's pretty normal to see an upward blip when you add solids back in to your repertoire. However, it's not "pointless" to measure your foods. If you've been told to stick to a certain amount, it's pretty important that you do so--even if you are not full or satisfied. It's also important not to drink while eating---your satiety will plummet as a result of having Fluid with foods. What little you do eat will move far too quickly from your pouch to the stomach below. I wouldn't worry for even a second about going to the doctor. He's seen it all before, and I'd venture to guess that more patients than not are in your shoes. He's not going to be disappointed--and he may have good guidance for you.

Well, the band certainly doesn't do the losing for you--it just makes it easier to limit your intake. So I guess, in that sense, it might be easier to follow a diet that is so rigid that all real accountability is removed. It also is pretty boring! I would never go back to the preop diet. First, I didn't lose much on it--I had already pared my carbs way down, so I didn't get a dramatic loss like many do. And secondly, I can find lots of ways to creatively eat the same number of calories--and get as much protein--in a way that is much more satisfying to me than drinking Protein shakes and excluding food. That said, I am eating in a way that is very, very different from the way that got me to the point of needing a band--and am losing really well with this approach.

How close together is your doctor willing to schedule fills? Mine typically does the first at 4 weeks postop, then subsequent ones at 6-week intervals. However, I'm barely 4 months out, and have already had 3 fills--with my fourth scheduled for next week. If you don't have good restriction, you will be hungrier than necessary. A 32-pound loss without restriction is a pretty great accomplishment! Call your doctor and let him know you need another adjustment---now. Then, when in his office, make an appointment for your next fill. All that said, your food choices play in considerably. What are you eating? Can you tweak it so that, even though you're not yet at the point where you feel satisfied, you at least get some satisfaction on the scale?

I have had a handful of 2-3 week periods when I've battled the same couple of pounds, up and down, up and down. I've always sort of chalked it up to my body getting used to changes. And it's always "decided" to let the weight go, ultimately. So I do try not to sweat little plateaus. That said, your post gives the impression that there is room for improvement in what you're eating. Do you journal? If you were to use a program like Fitday--even just for a short time---you would see whether eating kids' portions in restaurants is something that is going to help you reach your goals, or whether it's something that is unwittingly sabotaging you. I know that a restaurant meal (and I eat out with some regularity) really throws a wrench into the day, because it invariably involves ...well, pretty much a whole day's calories, unless I order very, very carefully (and pack up most to take home). I'd choose a nice appetizer before I'd choose from the kid's menu---kids' menus tend to be laden with fatty junk. (And I'd try to break away from the "eating out 'cause we're busy" mold, too. Eating out some is fine---but really, it takes MORE time to go to a restaurant, sit down, wait to order, get your order, eat, and pay than it does to make a meal at home. I'm not saying this to be critical; I am the former Queen of I'm Too Busy to Cook---and now that I actually do it, I am amazed at how much more time I have!)

Congratulations!

There are a small handful of band sizes currently available. I have an 11 cc Realize band, and it's working just fine. My doctor uses this, and the 14-cc Lap Band. He chooses the latter for people with very high BMIs, simply because they are easier to fit around a larger stomach. They still, with appropriate filling, provide restriction--even when the stomach size is significantly reduced. The band did not do the trick for your father-in-law. It's not for everyone--it does require a lot of aftercare (adjustment by the surgeon, and so on), and it does require hugely changed eating habits. Chances are, is failure has absolutely nothing to do with the size of the band. He may, however, have had difficulty gaining restriction if he did not have appropriate follow-up. Is he aware that gastric bypass---once he's past the initial gonna-lose-no-matter-what honeymoon phase (about a year)---will require the same sort of discipline, in terms of changing eating habits? Is he in a program that will provide the aftercare he needs to ensure that he really internalizes this? Because bypass patients can and do have difficulty maintaining their losses if they don't make the necessary changes.

I'm just about 4 months out, and while I've never attributed it to ripping sutures, I still have times when I get a pretty good wallop of pain at my port site. It's a foreign body that is working to situate itself in muscle---and sometimes, it doesn't win the battle. As time goes on, it's more firmly seated, and the pain wanes. (And then, you start noticing it changing position---when that happens, don't freak out! It just means your muscle isn't in the same place it was at the time of surgery; losing fat "deflates" you, so the muscle may move to a lower position.) ETA: I wanted to add that the pain I've experienced has been fleeting, followed by--at most---dull achiness. If you've had persistent severe pain, and it's returned, it might be a good idea to see the doctor for a little more investigation. While it likely is not anything serious. infection at the port site can occur, and once the incision is healed, pain is its hallmark.

Even thin people who are deconditioned struggled to get into their exercise regimens. Exercise is hard work, and when your body---whatever its size---is not used to it, it can be uncomfortable. Don't use the I'm-too-big excuse. Get into a good groove now, and it will help you a thousandfold in terms of not only getting to goal, but also your outlook and beliefs about your own abilities.

I would stick with liquids (so, say, broth instead of soup) for a good week before throwing in the towel. Then, I'd very gradually move from puree to mushy to solid.

Until I achieved restriction, "listening" to my body would have led to overeating. I still don't have consistent restriction--and I still weigh and measure. I can eyeball a good serving now, and listening to my body works most of the time. But I still have bottomless days---and choose not to continue to eat beyond what I really need to eat to promote good weight loss. At the beginning, this meant that I was hungry a good deal of the time. I was willing to pay that price to lose consistently during bandster hell.

I, too, walked right from the beginning. I added weights back in after my 4-week check.

It really depends. Everyone's metabolism is different, but there is the very general sense that those with more to lose do it faster. This may be true, pound-wise, but I am not at all sure it's true, percentage-wise. You are so, so, so close to your surgery that I really would not expect to see losses yet. Your body is still dealing with the insult & injury of anesthesia, incision, organ manipulations, meds, and so on. At this point, your BMI is not likely a factor. Your body is just marshalling all the resources it has to heal.

I have had difficulty with pills since surgery--well before I had restriction with other foods. I am sure the postop swelling played in at first. Whenever possible, I ask for liquid medications. I do have one VERY small pill I take each day, and it goes through okay (but I feel it). I also can take gelcaps or capsules filled with powder---as long as I drink something warm with them to dissolve the gelatin. But pressed tablets? They invariably get stuck, and take forever to work through the stoma. Ouch. I'd ask the doc if there are liquid alternatives---it just makes life a little less uncomfortable.

I add unflavored Protein powder to soups and broths and chili. You have to be careful to temper the protein when you do this so it doesn't get all clumpy and gross. To do this, you first mix it with cool to tepid Water to form a paste. Then, you very slowly stir in the heated liquid. You can't reheat, or the protein denatures (gets clumpy)---so you have to do this in single servings. I also add unflavored protein to yogurt and fat-free cottage cheese to bump up the protein. My favorite way to use it, currently, is to mix it with warm almond milk, good-quality vanilla extract (Nielsen-Massey or Penzey's), and a bit of Splenda. I really, really like this. I also use it in other smoothies---I like to blend together Protein Powder, kefir (kind of like pourable yogurt), inulin Fiber (such as FiberSure--it contains prebiotics that help the Probiotics in the kefir happily populate the intestine), a little Splenda, a little vanilla, about a quarter cup canned pumpkin (not the pie filling, just the plain pumpkin) and a good dash or four of pumpkin pie spice. This is a VERY filling--and really tasty--smoothie that does the trick for me when I really want something dessert-like. Delicious. And pumpkin is so good for you.

I'm not a nectar fan, either. I tried so hard to like it (after all, when you have a huge canister, you really feel obligated to like it!) But I recently ditched what I had. I found it wasn't horrible if I mixed it with Crystal Light. But it still wasn't good--and since I have limited stomach space, I really don't like choking down things I don't like! (On a funny note, I transferred some of it into a regular Rubbermaid canister in my pantry, and my son used it in a Thanksgiving recipe instead of flour. I kind of wondered why his roux didn't thicken, but the recipe, overall, turned out okay. When I was cleaning up after him---grrr!---I realized that he hadn't used flour, but instead used Roadside Lemonade. Of course, he felt compelled to announce this to everyone at the dinner table. But I don't think anyone would have noticed otherwise!)

I don't know what is going on with your body, but will tell you that with mine, loss does not occur at that caloric intake. It's insane--and I spent many years in denial because every authority I ever talked to or read informed me that eating below that level would be detrimental to me. BUT, after years of journaling my intake--whether doing low-carb or not---I concluded (with help) that my body needs 800-1000 calories/day to lose (when I have weight to lose), and to maintain (when I am at normal weight). It sucks. But it is what it is---and thank God for the band, because it makes it possible. You say that you log everything--that is a great start. Do you have journals going back to a point in time when you were losing well? If so, what was different then? For me, I could clearly see a pattern: I lost when within "my" calorie range, and I maintained or gained when above (depending on by how much). Exercise is crucial for me--without it, I cringe to think how much less I could eat. (It does afford me a bit of leeway to go over without consequence once in a while, too.) My suggestions would be to (a) really try to see patterns in your journals (what allowed you to lose in the past?), and (:confused: make sure that when you log, you're being brutally honest about serving size. Are you weighing and measuring? I'd also suggest that you track your body measurements---when the scale's not cooperating for me, I very often still see significant changes in measurements, telling me that other changes are going on in my body. As you swap out fat for muscle tissue, wonderful things happen, even if the scale does not show it.

I'm down about 44 pounds, and am just now noticing a difference. Others noticed earlier, but I'm slow on the uptake. I have been recording measurements each month on fitday. That has helped when I haven't had things like dropping clothing sizes to cheer me on. The inches add up, even if they're not coming off of places that are ordinarily hugged by, say, jeans. (I learned this in a lovely way this morning, when a three-strand pearl necklace I was given--and was sure would not fit around my fat neck---fit beautifully.)

It seems as though there are two (normal) bowel responses to surgery: diarrhea or ...well, nothing. May 5 was only a handful of days ago, and your gut was pretty cleaned out in advance. You still haven't added much in the way of food with residue, so it's to be expected that not much is there to exit. Unless you experience discomfort, bloating, etc, I would not be concerned. If you do reach that point--check with your doctor; mine recommends a gentle OTC stool softener.

If you'd already pared down the refined carbs in your diet, your weight loss on the preop diet may not be dramatic. It's generally the result of Fluid loss related to the massive loss of glycogen from the liver. If you don't have those glycogen stores, your loss will not be as dramatic. I didn't a notable amount on my preop diet; if you look at my stats, you'll see that it didn't really impact my ability to succeed with the band. Remember, while weight loss can be a bonus that comes from the preop diet, it's primary goal is to reduce the size of your liver so that your surgeon can more easily maneuver. You're accomplishing that, whether the scale gives you good news or not.

Could it be swelling after a stuck incident? I'd stick with liquids for a few days, then cautiously venture back to mushy, then solid, foods. Of course, call your doctor if you're concerned!