kimmason

Sorry Yoda I am computer brain dead:faint: does that mean I can't be a jedi knight? and wow those smile thingys that cloe put up with the cheerleaders etc, that was pretty SWEET, hell I could never have been a cheerleader, I couldn't fit into those damn costumes.

well cran berry/rasperrry crystal light. I only so far like the lime, maybe I can be adventurous lol like I have now gone from sushi, etc to crystal light flavours yaa haw you guys are hilarious, who needs t.v?Cloe you are roughly my weight so I am now feeling not so alone thankyou for telling me and your overwhelming support is so important to me. can you guys tel lI could never be a secretary my typing sucks!

Donna broth???? EEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWW! you had to do that before your surgery??? yuck! Yep I wil find out, maybe yoda knows since she did the same before her surgery.

thanks yoda>>when I can remove the pebble from your hand....grasshopper...lol. So why not carbonbated beverages? Where in T O are you roughly I am newmarket way

HEY JUDE, Don't be afraid take a sad saga about weight loss and make it better...tell us or I will creat more lyrics to that song about ya and you'll have to put up with it. Now come on, say uncle and give!

lol< I laughed aftre reading these posts, was thrilled about argons move with dan and why the heck are you bored argon cuz of no computer>???? Hell you are finally alone with him,,HAVE SEX! I am thrilled and love rubbermaid....thats weird I uess and I love deals and you got them, congrats! Your weight loss is great and i would kiss my own butt if I could weigh 170 again. and as for friendships, I can't think of a safer place to be where i am accepted.

well I am not banded til august 10th but hell I ahve nothing better to do than eat cottage cheese, so why not?

okay, JUST when I was feeling confident ( my first day of cottage cheese) and I am being banded August 10th..I read this poor girls claim about probs with food. oh oh, and geeze don't tell me guys you can still eat chocolate ARGH., I love that stuff..lol and I heard we cannot take carbonated anymore as far as fluids ..why? what happens? I was talking to Nisrine at TBLC and she says she likes Long Island ice teas too sometimes and there is pepsi in it, she thought it was just ice tea......NOPE. Anyway I hope you sort out those issues and can eat without difficulty again.

where was the concert and I sing professionally ( or did) so when I get smaler I won't tel you where since you hate blues...lol

hey Yoda have a blast and enjoy. I ahve nevr been to a Target and wil lose alot first but then get down there. Its just that i have soo much to lose, what do you and everyone else think? do you now wait til you lose the weight before you shop or get it as you go along? I have been wearing the same freaking clothes for ages.

Wow you guys are amazing and sooooooo supportive, Ya know what ? i ate last night, the night before my cottage cheese /yogurt smorgasborg begins and I planned to eat boatloads, but I couldnt. I mean, I ate as much perhaps as two people but what the hey, it was good for me. Okay so I took your advice. I bought another csale. it didn't read TILT this time. So here goes I am 5'9 " and I now eigh 320 lbs...THERE I SAID IT and ya knwo what I have NEVER told anyone that. no one, I even refuse to get weighed by the skinny little nurse at the docs office. Just being able to tel someone that is huge for me. I took my measuremnts,,and the frigging tape wasn;t big enough for my hips...lol but aren't I in proportion when my hips are 12 inches more than my bust? Problem is my wast is only two inches smaller than my boobs. So here it begins i guess , now this is a stupid question but I was never told by the TBLC folks gow much cottage cheesesand yogurt I am supposed to eat??????? I mean a 1/3 cup is 130 calories , isn't that stupid? i could eat a small chocolate for that amount:heh: . ( I won't) So I bought loads of crystal light too and it begin. I am stil brain dead re thre ticker thing and a very nice person sent me the instructions and everything, sooountil I fugure it out, I will just write it. So thankyou, Wow normally best froends take forever to get to know etc,,but you guys have been such a safe place for me and I am grateful. Luv ya...lol and we haven't even had sex!!! Joking, I like men too much.

Hi slimwithin I am not near you unfortunetly I am in toronto canada, actually newmarlet area here. i would have loved it if we lived closer and could meet. I REALLY need the support and then can see how someone else is getting through this. I am the night before my preop diet and I am stuffing it all in and fought all day with Peter,, cried three times and thta is not the confident me..infact I don't feel confident at all. Thank sfor caring.

Hi fellow Canucks You have helped me make a huge decision and it is bigger than i thought. i booked my surgery aftre reading from all of you ,and although i checked out the other chats , it was with the canadians who were supportive, compassionate, and I just felt were with me all the way. I am supposed to start my two week cottage cheese/yogurt eating wednesday and I am getting scared. I just came back from a movie where i stuffed in a huge box of popcorn and a double whopper with cheese........damn, am i going to be able to do this??? I also realize that this relationship that I have struggled with now for some time, that of all times..but I am not gettiing support here and as much as I loved this person, i am tired of feeling hurt and dealing with someone who seems so apathetic , great timing to end it huh?. I have never put myself first, I mean it has always been, making my parents happy, but failing cuz i couldn't please us both, trying with my ex husband and realizing I married the wrong person and sticking in there for 12 yrs and eating myself into a coma, then losing good friends to cancer ( four in two years) and three relationships in 14 years that have gone the way of the dodo including this one where I don't know what to do and I can't let things just go, even if they are bad for me. I am scared, I am soo scared of this, but I feel I have no choice and I have to get through it, I mean what else is there for me?? obesity has come calling now since I am 23 and with three kids and more and more weight ..I have doubled my weight and don't feel like me anymore, but somehow that was never incentive enough for me to lose it, WHY????? I hate it and it can kill me. I guess that I will have to do this on my own and don't know how soon after I can drive etc cuz i don't want to have to ask my folks to look after me, I mean I HAVE MADE this choice and I have to see it through. I am sorry that I am bitching here, but I have no one else who knows or who will understand but god I am scared. How can i stick with this food diet thing for two weeks before and 4 weeks after if I can't stick to a diet now??? I have him in my house, the tension here is unbearable, and here i am pathetically drinking ( i usually don't , so not another vice) and I am here in my basement on line to people I don't know. Man, I dont know how I got here and I don't know if I will ever get out. I am to be banded august 10th I guess if I don't chicken out. Please anyone help me, how does one get through this, a relationship that is dead and look after oneself and how soon? I would appreciate ANY advice and geeze I sound like I am 16...nope in my forties! thanks KIm

Hi fatmikeslim. wow thankyou soo much for opening up and I can empathize with your unrequited love. It is soo painful. I hope that as you move on,lose weight and gain more confidence that she sees that in you and if she doesn't , then someone else wil see that spark. You can bet on it!

P.S How the heck do you guys do the strip with how many days to go and then the one with your starting weight, pre op weight etc,,how do you get that graph thingy?? Inquring minds want to know!

Yoda god are you a wise sage or what....and to think you are a cancer..that must be it huh? You hit the nail onthe head and man did I get emotional when i read what you wrote, I swear I am holding on to everything you said to me and then scribby and cloe wow. I feel cared for and although this is the net and perhaps not real in one sense it is VERY real to me and the only support I really have. The funny thing is, I know my family love me but we don't always show it and I will not tell my kids how scared I am, I dont want them to worry. My brother well he isn't the talkative type and where before i spent my life worried about what people thought and tried to please everyone, I am just going to let it be for now. I know he cares and I told him why and how my life has been and I am not doing this for him or rather not going to do this for him, I have to no matter what happens do this for me and that is most likely the best present I can give to myself or anyone I love, ME first for a change. Funny how I have known loads of people worked on air on radio and have loads of aquaintences, but this is my battle and I onky share this with you, those that have walked the walk or going to and I barely know you but I feel close. I am not young anymore,, yup 40's now and although I feel young in some ways I have already lived a life with one marriage, some relationships since etc.. I walked out of my marriage with nothing but my dignity afte I was in Somalia during the civil war volunteering as a nurse. That experience changed my life and I realized how blessed we are.. so I left my marriage and still felt with little that i had my sanity and more than many , so I can't complain. I had three relationships post marriage where this sounds stupid, but learned more about life and sex than I did when I was married. AS for this reltionship, I am saddened most for that as he was "the one" and I am convinced but I pushed him away over a year ago with my insecurities etc and he hasn't come back emotionally ,anyway, so I am no victim, and I only have me to blame and I have now tried to prove myself for over a year but nothing, so I hang in and wait for him to wake up...and it won't happen ,while I go see as shrink to sort all of this out with eating etc, childhood stuff etc.. oddly enough Dr Harville Hendrixes books are consoling too right now and explains quite well how and where we got messed up as kids and how we pay for it and make our partners pay for it. Inspired enough that I am going to pursue it and become a marriage councillor...yup, don't laugh. I am good for other people and can save their life, deliver their babies etc.. just was not good for myself. If I could hug you all and have your words daily to see me through then I will be okay I hope.Anyway I only have today to go with food, so I have only eaten one chicken korma meal from presidents choice and I have some errands to run and then I think the MANDARIN has my name written on it for dinner. Yoda, happy birthday by the way.I am July 4th, and that is truly the reason for the fireworks!

Mike wow you have tenacity......only reserved I thought for us moody cancerians!When did you have your surgery and how much did you weigh? I am stirred by your words and on one hand I think great, perhaps I can do this by myself, but on the other I guess i feel completly alone. I told my family at my b day dinner that i was thinking of having it. My mom and brother are against it, but my brother lost a friend to gastric bypass, i told them i was thinking about it...,my stepfather stayed silent. I then two weeks later wrote them e mail and told them I was going to have it. My mother is okay but of course not convinced and my brother has not breathed a word to me but I know he does not support it. I am living with someone ,but really who am i kidding, I am alone and think there is nothing worse than being lonely in a relationship. I feel like a failure that i let myself get up to this weight and then again, does anyone else feel like this, I feel like I almost live outside my body. I mean my mom freaks if she gains five pounds and will then cut back or diet, me ,....well I never think I knew or felt what I weighed which is over 300 lbs and honestly for a fat person I was in pretty good health although in the last year i am starting with the joints etc. So although I am inspired by you and I guess now know I can do this, I feel alone and lonely. I mean yes you guys are all out here and give each other and now me support, but really does anyone here rewlly know each other? If someone didn't write for days, how would anyone know what happened to them? We are all just words here on a computer and I guess maybe that is just me and living in a cave right now. Boy I gotta try and perk up if I am going to get though this. Well today is my last day so I better get out and grab food, scales, other errands and then buckle down and DO IT!

Yoda...another day...I woke up early to find his highness sleeping on the couch, well we don't sleep together anymore. I go to bed and find him on the couch or on another bed and then of course I think, well he no longer finds me attractive ,and then I feel great again about me of course. After i fed the dogs , I stumbled downstairs to my lair where the computer is and found your message to me...... and cried! Thankyou for your lovely email. I have only today to eat like a pig....is that normal to want to stuff in everything before the famine part? I am walking on tenderhooks here with this relationship or lack thereof and I have to mindset to me and let this go. Yeah I am scared re sticking to this cottage cheese yogurt thing, and is this 14 day pre op diet only for pts that are what? WAyy over weight or does everyone do it? I don;t even have a scale so I guess today i should buy one, and stand on it and be sick at what i am and then hopefuly feel better as time progresses:clap2: . I am grateful that i found this website and yoda ( no idea what your name is) thankyou and gald to know thatyou were banded by Joffe/Yau too as it was starting to look like everyone was banded by Coburn. I heard lots about Joffe before when i worked in radio that he was the guy, and so I feel assured that if I was going to do it, he's the man so here I am, 16,000 poorer, a relationship on the skids, and depressed as heck....I just hope this is anew beginning. Of course my mom chimes in, this will not change your life or make you happy( she being perfectly 130 lbs forever)......no, I think wrong, My weight has changed my life, made me reclusive, kept me away from so many things in life I couldn';t do or was afraid to do and i think that this will not solve the problems of the world etc..but it's a start, for me.

oh hey sorry, Buffie and Donna thankyou for reading and letting me vent

apt looks great argon ,CONGRATS to you both!

well to continue I have three sons but they are older and do not need me liek they used to. Oldest two on their own and this year youngest wants to be in the big smoke so he is with his dad..so just me in the basement while the one ( BF)who ignores me sits upstairs watching tv. Yes i have tried talking til I am blue in the face but I can see,he shuts me out as I get that glazed look in his eyes. Can I do this? Do you need support and someone to help and drive etc. I have three dogs too so I will need to be there for them. I am feeling really miserable,honest to god, and why must I eat yogurt and cottage cheese?? How will that help my liver, I don't understand, boy I can see that I will feel more yucky as far as mood when I do that. I am supposed to have a b day party for my mom and son on the 7th of aug,,just three days before i get banded, how the heck am I going to pull that off and just eat cottage frigging cheese??? I must apologize to you all for sounding so down. I have read you guys now everyday and I feel like you get to know someone, I mean mandy aka ARGon is hilarious, Yoda is the wise sage, there's cloe and the list goes on and on, man I feel like I am looking through the romper room mirror.. Anyway apologies!

:help: hi there canucks I am kim and I went for my first consultation today and said, "okay, let's do it"...I have fought this "hamster in a wheel" bit for years now and if I don't do something about it, it will get me. So surgery Aug 1oth although I am scared. I mean I got here myself and haven't had any discipline thus far, I am sweating just thinking about the pre op diet and then post op, hell ,if I had that discipline, couldn't i do this myself? i will borrow the money and its not cheap..16,000. so i read peoples BMI's ,,um I don't know what mine is. am I supposed to?. they didn't weigh me today. I know nothing about the size of the band and I read people saying they had a band of such and such size...am I supposed to know this? I also read that folks say they had fills and say how many cc's. Am i supposed to know that too? I worry that i can't drink with meals as i am used to it, i worry i may choke,....I sound wimpy sorry. I worry most that this will not solve the problem of always feeling hungry...... I do not want to tell anyone other than immediate family but can I hide this? I mean if I go out to dinner with friends next year....am i still eating next to nothing and not even having a glass of wine and they wonder what the heck is wrong with me? I think, " man, i drink diet pepsi once in a while" and I don't drink coffee so I get my caffeine that way...so wow sounds like lots of restrictions . Anyway I guess i sound awful but ANY help /advise would be greatly appreciated. I get done by Drs Joffe and Yau on the 10th of Aug, so I guess I better start reading the pre op diet soon. thanks for reading Kim

thanks leetha I guess I got scared about flying because I read afew horror stories on the complications part of this web site and it scared the crap outta me. now am i just fooling myself that i can do this I mean I start the pre op diet on wed and i am here eating chocolate and cheeesies. Geeze does this ever stop?

whew..thanks , I was worried I would never be able to travel again, and if i did, would i ever be able to eat normally again?

Argon you are funny....lol, with last comment. Devana congrats again andI am paying 16,000 canadian for my banding on August 10th? why must we virtually live on yogurt and cottage cheese for 2 weeks before surgery...man I am beginning to think if i had that discipline i might be able to do it on my own. The 16,000 covers surgery all seminars, fills etc.... forever i guess. signed soon to be a goddess...or a legend in my own mind!