Big Momma is Shrinking

I would have to agree I think as it becomes more real he is scared of what this will mean for your future. I'm sure first and formost is that he is concerned about you undergoing surgery and what that might do to you, but also as you change physically are you still going to be interested in him or will you be a little to flattered by all the attention you will get with your new hotter body. It sounds like he loves you very much (my husband also never saw my true size). Men are funny creatures, and we all know they are not about to come out and say they are afraid of something!! (sorry guys reading this but I've been married 15yrs I'm not making this up...LOL). Try to ger/keep your hubby involved and informed about the process, I think that the best way to ease his mind and gain support is to keep him in the loop. Good luck I hope that you are able to jump on the road to a hot new you soon!! Happy Skrinking!! ~Monica

I would ask about the fill schedule after being banded....seems they are not all alike I didn't ask and was suprised to learn my surgeon has filled spaced 12wks apart!! I just assumed that my fills would be pretty much the same as most everyone elses I've read about, boy was I mistaken!

Congratulations!!!! Not only do you look WONDERFUL, but even better it sounds like you FEEL wonderful!!!

I was banded 3/26/09.....I have not found anything yet that hasn't agreed with me (not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing).

Bigpappa.... I think you deserve a standing ovation for recognizing what you are doing before you started see it on the scales or in your clothes. What are the chances that would have happen in your pre-band life? You have already had TREMENDOUS success and you don't get to discount that. I think i've told you before so excuss me for repeating myself, but this is the rest of your life, there is no designated time limit where your weightloss is concerned. Yes we all have to have goals, and we're gonna be faaaar more successful if we are working toward a goal, but aren't our "diet days" behind us. Instead of killing yourself to make a goal focus on healthy eating and an active lifestlye from now on. I don't ever want to resent my band and feel like I'm forced to sacrifice....for me the day I was banded my "diet days" ended. Yes I'm more active now, eat less, and pay attention to what goes in my mouth, but I don't evern plan to diet again. All I'm saying is don't kill yourself or beat yourself up about getting to a certain weight on a certain day....in my opinion that is how the cycle of being fat gets going again. This is the rest of your life remember. Happy Shrinking (you are a real inspiration to a lot of people) ~Monica

kspeaker....I am thrilled to hear your husband is in the loop now and ready to give you the support you need!!!!! I suggest you keep him involved and educated. He loves you and he wants to know that above all else you are going to be ok. Good luck on your journey, I wish you much success!!!! ~Monica

When I first decided the band was the answer for me my hubby said "I don't know how I feel about that." I lef him no in no uncertain terms that this was not HIS desicion to make. I live in this body not him, and he has no idea how it feels to carry around all this extra weight, how badly all my joints hurt all the time. Now maybe I didn't start off with the best approach, but we talked more, I took him with me to a siminar and then he began to understand more. He's seen me lose weight...and then gain it all back again. I think one of the main reasons he was hesitiant in the begining was that the idea of this scared him, to him better for me to be fat then dead. He was able to ask question, the surgeron has a cpl of ladies in the office that are lap banders and very open about their stories, he had lots of questions, but once he was able to talk to someone that's been there it helped a great deal to put his mind at ease. I had his complete support long before I ever went into the operating room. Weightloss is a hard battle we fight with ourselves everyday, you need your spouse on your side, not fighting against you. I hope that you can talk and perhaps he can meet someone who's already been there to help give him a clearer picture. Good luck to you!!! ~Monica

I'm happy to be your cheerleader or weightloss police (whichever you need) anytime!!! It really helps when there is someone you can talk to along this journey. While we are all going to have our own unquie experiences we can all also relate to how other bandsters feel. As far as writing down what you eat I would recommend using an online source because it will track cal/fat/prot/carbs and I think it helps if you see the whole picture that way you know if something is lacking or you are going overboard in some areas. If you ever need someone to talk to, vent to, or Celebrate with I'm always here send me a message and I will send you my yahoo messenger if you wanna talk. I hope everything goes great at todays fill Kathi...might be a good time to look at the 5 day pouch test too (that might be a really great way to get you back on track). Hugs ~Monica

I had terrible port pain from about 3wks out to almost 6wks. Whenever I twisted or stretched my torso it felt like being stabbed with a hot knife (it would take my breath away). I'm happy to report that has finally passed, and no it wasn't a flipped port, just part of the healing process for me. Remember that your port is either stiched or crimped into your stomach muscles so any pulling can be very painful. I hope all is well...if you are unsure call the doctor though, that's what they are there for!! ~Monica

I recommend a food log, write down EVERYTHING you are putting in your mouth this way you won't be fooling yourself about how much you did or didn't eat. For me, just having to write it down help from the very begining. Have you considered joining on of the challenges?? Make yourself a REALSTIC goal and then join the challenge, I know sometimes it helps to just have a sense of being accountable to someone else. It kinda sounds to me like that "new band feeling" has worn off. Focus on what got you to the surgeon's office to begin with. And you are obviously ready to do something about it, or you wouldn't have posted here to begin with. You may have to suffer some to get back on track....go buy yourself something sexy and hang it up where you HAVE to look at it EVERYDAY...and then when you feel like cheating or sitting on the couch or your just damn tired of suffering take a look at your sexy outfit...or better yet try it on and see how close you are to actually being able to wear it in public. Good luck...it sounds like you are walking up the mountain right now try to remember the view is worth it! ~Monica

I'm sorry yall are all feeling so crappy....your body is "detoxing" from all the carbs and sugar that you are usually giving it. Try to drink plenty of Water to help flush all the carp outta your system and just keep telling yourself....this is only temporary, I CAN do this!! It's going to get better I promise...just use this board to vent as much as you need to. Happy shrinking to all of you!! ~Monica

Personally I think you have to stop and consider.....even though you may have NO FILL in your band it has created a smaller stomach pouch that doens't require as much food to feel full. From the very begining I have NOT been able to eat as much food as I was eating Pre-band. The food has to slow down to pass thru the opening into your "bottomeless pit." I don't understand how anyone can eat the same volumes of food AFTER having their band with or without a fill...I just don't understand it. And I also believe alot of people take Ceradad's approch, I don't think you will have long term success if you are sitting back "waiting for your band to start working." For me the band is simply a tool to help me MAINTAIN weightloss, I know I can do the work required to lose weight, I've done it time and again, but I truely feel like THIS TIME I CAN KEEP IT OFF....and THAT'S what my band is gonna do for me (I hope). ~Monica

and it only gets better from here savannahsmommie!!!!!

You can blame me for posting to the wrong thread, I didn't see that there were weeklies until after I had posted to the wrong thread (sorry), but I agree it would be simpler to have one ongoing Friday Weigh-in Bernadette...congrats to you on your great work, I'm happy to hear that you and your band are learning to "play nice." I have yet to have any issues with my band, some days I think I push it a little just to see if anything is going to happen, but so far my body is workin like normal (I know one day I'm gonna be sorry for "testing" it). Lapdog....congrats on your sucess as well!! I'm curious if you are planning to do protien shakes the rest of your life? I only ask this because I know my surgeon was pretty adament that he wanted me to learn to eat the right foods and fill my pouch with solids. He never put me on any protien shakes and actually recommended that I not do shakes, but instead eat foods that will stay in my pouch and keep me feeling full. I hope I'm not hitting a nerve, but I'm just wondering if you are planning to incorperate shakes into your daily diet from here on out or if you are just using them as part of a weight loss regimen, if so are you concerned about what might happen when you do return to eating solid food for all your meals? I have to report that the "scale gods" FINALLY smiled on me!!!! I was about ready to throw the stupid thing out the window....but it is begining to creep down a little again....that makes it soooo much easier to spend my lunch hour climbing stairs and walkin in the Houston heat!!! Hope everyone else is see progress....and we all need to remember (especially me!!!) even slow progress is progress!!! Happy shrinking ~ Monica

Congrats!!!! It's always great to here others are having success!!! You keep doing what you are doing and you'll be cleaning out the closet before you know it!!

Well it's Friday..... So I've decided to only step on the scales on Fridays (only 1 day a week for the possibility of disappointment verses every morning). 220 this morning.....down a wooping 4.5 lbs since my 1st fill on May 1, man this is sure going slower then I wanted it to!!! If I only lose 4 lbs a month I'm gonna be fat forever!!! UGH!!!

LOL....too funny!! I have to 2nd everything that Cathy said, and the heating pad will be a BIG help!! I keep one at my desk at work too and used it for about the 1st 2wks back. Make sure you are drinking plenty of water too...good luck I hope you get to feeling a little more like normal SOON!! ~Monica

I had port pain (felt like being stabbed with a hot knife) for about 5 wks. You have to rememebr that your port is either clamped or sutured to your abdominal muscle. everytime you stretch that muscle you are moving that port and the chit hurts!!! It gets better though, I'm 8 wks post op and no real pains anywhere to speak of....for me twisitng or pulling up from a slouching position were triggers for the pain. My PA told me "burning pain" = healing, but if it got worse or persisted then check back in, so that's my suggestion to you, if it's more then a short lived sharp, burning pain check with your doctor.

Don't give up on yourself, you deserve better then that!!! There is a bandster on here, I think her name is Kellibelly who didn't not reach her goal for 3yrs.....please don't throw your hands up and say "oh well I failed again" I totally agree you should make an appointment to see your surgeon and get back on track. You went to the expense and effort to get the band in the first place, don't you think you should make it work for you. I'm sorry you don't have any local support to turn to, but we are all just a mouse click away and I truely believe everyone on here wants to see you suceed. I know I do!!! ~Monica

If you are hungry and just not getting satisfied you should call your doctor and speak to someone. If they give you the green light to advance your diet then so be it. In my opinion it's NOT a good idea to advance your diet just because you think you are ready for something more. And it is true that you can cause damage that might not show for months or even years down the line. I'm not trying to use a "scared straight" tactic here, but the bottom line is you should be following your surgeons guidelines, if you feel like it's not enough for you then your best bet is to speak to someone in your surgeons office and let them be your guide. I know this is hard, that's why it's called Bandster Hell....but you can do this and you are better off reminding yourself this is a very short time period in your journey to a healthy new you. Good luck and stay strong! ~Monica

sassysara - I'm sorry to hear that the healing process is going slow for you, all I can say is that I'm very fortunet that I bounce back quickly, my band was my 3rd lap surg in less then 18mnths and every surg I've had I was back to myself in close to a weeks time, I hope you get to feeling more like yourself soon!! mimmosa - in the begining just be gentle!! missionary (but he can't rest his weight on you) or doggie, just no rough stuff, for us it was about 3-4 wks before things began to return to normal as far as ummm vigorous activites go. But I can tell you this....as I lose more weight things are only getting better!!! For me personally the most discomfort came from my port, that took the longest to heal. I was having soreness and sharp pains for a good 5wks or so, but I'm happy to report I'm 2mnths out and everything is gooood! LOL

Not gonna beat you up and definetly not here to judge, but now that you've recogonized this do everything you can to stop it. Yes we are all gonna have slip ups and eat the wrong thing from time to time or sit on our lazy butts when we should be burning up the fat, my concern for you is not so muchabout what you ate, but when you eat it. Your body is healing right now and adjusting to the band. I doubt you did permenant damage, but advance your diet to quickly can lead to problems down the road. Good for you for telling on yourself, and I hope you find the support you need here among us, and most importantly I hope your family is healing well...it still amazes me sometimes how some people can act so savage. Good luck to you and your sister and nephew!!

I think you will be just fine.....for us it was 5 days. Just make sure to save any wild circus moves for when things have had a chance to heal more.

While I have not yet had an issue with pb'ing or vomiting since being banded I believe most bandsters will tell you you should do liquids for a day or two then advance to soft foods just as you did post op in order to give your stomach time to settle and prevent any further irritation. The more irritation to the stomach the more potiental for swelling, then the more chance for pi/vomiting episodes. I know you are hungry, but try to take it easy....and if I were you I think I would say no more left over steak. Good luck, and take it slow ~Monica

Trish, You may want to ask your doctor what his fill schedule is like. This is something I never thought to ask, I simply assumed that it would be much like everyone elses. Well my first fill was at 5 wks and my 2nd fill was not scheduled until 12 WEEKS LATER!!! I thought there must be a mistake on the appt card so I called to verify. The girl at the appt desk said no that was correct that fills are scheduled 3 months apart. So word to the wise, ask up front what to expect. ~Monica