BethFromVA

I tormented myself and watched the replay of the Martin Bashir interview with Michael a few years ago. That is the interview where he talked about getting into bed with all these kids and how "sweet" it is. GAG! Nobody needed the tabloids for fodder on him, HE sank himself. Watching him talk about it was downright creepy and made my skin crawl.

With the economy the way it is and lenders not really leanding out much money, you'd think you could work a deal about now... :tongue2:

I did as I promised Ebony yesterday and contacted (via e-mail) a therapist here in town whose top three specialties includes eating disorders. Now I wait to hear back.

Wow, doesn't pay to try to be nice, does it? :tongue2: I can't think of anything... I'm assuming you got it directly from Coach and not from a local store, so I can't imagine how you can track its owner down. That's sad. My mom found a wedding band (man's) in her yard one time, and it's apparent that somebody sometime during the life of that house had dug up the septic system and lost it. Don't know if it was a worker, a homeowner, or what, but it was engraved with initials and a wedding date. VERY sentimental, and no way that I could figure to find the owner. :cursing:

G4E, I really hope and pray you start feeling better really soon. :tongue2:

fantastic!!!!!

Chantel, grow up and move on. And quit proving my point. I don't care who you came on here to attack, you started immediately by being very personal towards a poster here, and there was absolutely no reason for that.

Chantel's very first post here was this, and WAS a personal attack, drawing first blood: "i think youre an idiot and a royal ass. and to post untrue remarks about a person when they're dead shows the type of person you are. im 23, never bought his music and probally never would, but i'll be damned if i would ever talk ill of the dead. by the way, we all make mistakes with our kids. to condemmend someone beacuse of their mistakes, shows just how little of a person you are. you got your attention, i hope youre happy! p.s this is intended to the original poster... " That's not acceptable "opinion" around here. You're right. Too many "assholes" coming on with personal attacks against other posters because they don't like what's being said, even though the title says what it's going to be about. :tongue2: If only those "assholes" could choose to pick better threads to post on, there wouldn't be the problems.

That's EXACTLY what I was trying (and failing) to say! Hehehe yeah, well I know what to tell others, but I'm not so good at "hearing" it from myself very well. Y'know what, Ebony? Maybe it's time for your white suit again. That seemed to make you feel SO strong and SO sure... you can't buy that feeling of empowerment. :rolleyes2:

I know. I just didn't see it as a pity party. It's a factual part of this journey for many of us and something we need to tackle. I see pity parties as meaning something negative, and this wasn't negative in that way, imo. It's a negative part of our journey, but it's very real.

No pity party, Slim, them's the facts of this journey for many of us. You are talking to/about me as well. The habits/choices we used to get to the points we did don't automatically go away because of a band. :rolleyes2:

Omg, do you know how lucky you are?! I've read a lot of other people having very different reactions to their weight loss. Sometimes I even feel sabotaged a bit by my DH -- not because he doesn't want me to lose weight, but he wants HIS goodies more (i.e. eating out, etc.). Friday I allowed him to talk me into going to a buffet, something I haven't done since surgery. I regretted it afterwards. I told him over the weekend that it's the first and last time I'm going to one, and he couldn't figure it out. Asked if it was because of the temptation, and I said yes, partly, but also that it's not worth the money either. He chose that moment to start arguing with me over the cost, blah blah blah. He's still with us, but barely. :rolleyes2: If he wants to go, he can go by himself from now on. Then that's all you can hope for. You sound a lot like me, about the insecurity. From the outside, people don't really see it, but I have told a few close people I think the weight thing was to make me larger than life and somebody that people wouldn't mess with because I could hide my insecurities behind all this blubber. Which is SO stupid because all it did was make me more insecure because now I became virtually invisible. But the girth gave me a false sense of strength (as weird as that sounds) and I think I kinda turned into the bull in the china shop because of it. I'll make you a deal -- if you do it, then I will too. I've talked about it for a while but haven't done it yet. Tried OA and went back to Weight Watchers, but it's not the same. I need something more personalized and specific. I know mine did, but she either didn't take my insurance or any insurance, and I just couldn't part from that much money, y'know? lol That's what we're here for -- to make you feel better, see things from an outside perspective, and save each other's DH's lives. :crying:

Aw, honey, I wish this didn't make you feel so badly. I certainly don't live in your home and I don't know the dynamics of you two, but my immediate instinct when I read this (through you, as I can't tell from the conversation) that he's supporting you. Look, whether you're "competing" against thick women (of which you are quickly leaving that category) or ALL women, there is still a competition there inside you. Would you really feel better if you knew he for sure loved them thicker and you are leaving that thickness behind? You'd feel just as badly and insecure. I am a huge proponent of therapy during this time (she says as she sits here without getting any yet... :crying:). We are changing, the way people look at us is changing, and it can be very hard to figure out where we fit in. We're no longer the fat friend/family member/neighbor, we start getting attention, maybe the attention from our SO changes and we don't know how to handle it, we feel better about ourselves and more self-assured, etc. Plus the hormones alone that are released during this much weight loss! It all plays a huge part in our psyche and can mess us up. I really want to find somebody who deals most specifically with eating disorders. I really should start checking around because my bad habits of stress eating have been affecting me over the last couple months. :crying:

I thought the same thing as I read this. I don't know what I'd dislike more: A DH who "changes what he likes" as I change, or one who wants me to stay where I was and either sabotages my hard work or worse, can't deal with my change or wants out because I'm getting healthy and leaving him behind. I'm personally thinking I'd dislike the latter one more. Look at it this way, Ebony -- he was and is happy with YOU, no matter where you were/are in your journey. You can say maybe you would have started this earlier had you known he liked them thinner -- and maybe you would have -- but YOU would have had to come to that conclusion with or without him. This is about us, after all, not anybody else. Nobody can make us do anything until we're ready. When YOU were fed up enough, you took the steps to do this. Before that time, his saying something MIGHT have gotten you started sooner, but would it really? Would YOU have been invested in you at that time? If you're like me, maybe not. Remember, we can never diet or even do this surgery for other people -- we HAVE to be 100% invested in ourselves and 0% doing this for other people. I don't look at it as much as lying as him not wanting to do anything to hurt you. He loved you 50 pounds heavier, and he loves the new you that is emerging. He is being supportive, it sounds like, and is not moping or disappointed in your change like some spouses can do. Relish that and maybe try to look at the opposite side of the coin. Just my two cents... :rolleyes2:

Thanks, Rodriguez. And yes, that was exactly my point -- I was a grown adult when all this stuff came out and I saw it firsthand. And even if y'all were old enough to see the stories and understand what was being talked about, y'all were still looking at it through the eyes of children rather than the eyes of adults who don't see innocence in anything anymore. That's why kids are raised by adults, because kids don't see what we do, they don't comprehend it, they don't come to the same conclusions because kids' minds are innocent and still developing. It's hard for us too, who grew up watching him go from being a little boy to this weird creature. Many people want to hold onto the young Michael and can't get their minds around what he turned into. It's understandable that they can't go there, but at the very least, Michael showed a MAJOR lack of judgment. At worst, he molested those kids.

You're COMING (proper spelling) from left field. But if you can't carry on mature dialogue, maybe you should not be on message boards for mature individuals such as myself. :rolleyes2:

No, I know more about this because I was there and saw the news reports, including what HE said. That's not what I said, but okay... You're not a child, but I'm only basing that on your age, not your maturity level. However, again, I saw what HE even said on the news, what the kids said, how they described very intimate parts of his anatomy, the rooms that were found in his home that were questionable and had alarms and cameras to let him know if anybody was coming, and the fact that even HE said he slept with boys who were not his children. I won't if you won't be pissed at me for finding you to be as ignorant and immature as my daughter, who is your age. And it's "you're," honey, not "your." :rolleyes2:

And what would he do, say, "Crap, ya caught me! I did it"?? SERIOUSLY?? No, i got my information from the NEWS, not the tabloids. Being that you could probably not even form cohesive sentences (due to your age) at the time this was all going on, you really don't know what YOU'RE talking about. Only in a court of law. The court of public opinion is a totally different animal. Betcha think OJ was innocent too. :rolleyes2:

How do you know the remarks about him molesting children is untrue? And though we may all make mistakes with our children, I've never dangled my infant over a railing with a diaper over her face. Nor do I know anybody who would. Not anybody NORMAL, anyway...

I think both are reprehenisble and disgusting. Then again, I can't stand rappers. Feel most of 'em are the scum of the earth and have NO talent.

Morning, everybody (oops, almost afternoon :thumbdown:)! First and foremost, EBONY!!! YOU ROCK, GIRL!! Congratulations on the size 16's!! Enjoy it, but not for too long, if you know what I mean. Secondly, HAPPY BIRTHDAY LULU! Have you finally made it to 21? :thumbup: G4E, I'm so sorry to hear about your back. I hope something can help you with that. Mac, SO sorry to hear about losing your bag. The closest I can relate to was the only expensive pair of sunglasses I've ever owned (and for me, $89 was expensive). I barely had them a month and went motorcycle riding with DH and a friend one day, put them in the breast pocket of the denim shirt I was wearing for protection, took the shirt off and slung it over my arm, and apparently they fell out. By the time I noticed, they were gone. :w00t: Omg, I'm still woozy from last night. Went outside to let the dogs out and our neighbor wanted to show me the finished product in his backyard (took down old deck last fall, put in small sitting area with gazebo tent, etc.) He was out there taking a few pictures and enjoying a glass of wine, so he offered me one. I don't even remember what time I went over there (could have been 7:00, 7:30), but I came stumbling home at 10:00 after three glasses of wine and made a beeline to bed. Omg, it wasn't all that long ago that I could put liquor away -- don't drink often, but when I would do it, I'd overdo like I did food. And now three glasses of wine and I was toast. I woke up when hubby left at 6:00 this morning and laid there until about 6:30, then turned on the tv in the bedroom. Turned it off again sometime after 8:00 and thought about getting up, but my head was still swimmy. Laid back down and got up at 11:30!! The good news is that I'm down 5 pounds since Friday. I've been having a rough time of it lately and making not-so-good choices and was actually UP SEVEN POUNDS from my lowest!! So yesterday I decided to do liquids only, and likely today too, to get back on track. Saturday was almost a totally liquid day since we went to a beerfest. I had some sort of wrap while there, but then we went out for sushi later and I had three pieces and PBed all of it up for some reason. Another reason I did liquids yesterday. Anyway... I almost feel like I need a fill again, and quick. I didn't like the acid backup when I was overfilled, but I LOVED not being hungry at all. It almost felt like he took out 5cc instead of taking me down to 5cc. My next fill's not until the 9th, but I may try to see if he's available to do it next Monday after I get back from my sister's.

How does "disrespecting" him on a lap band message board impact his children -- or his fans, for that matter?

They described a distinguishable mole.

They will, once we go socialized medicine. But that is another thread, another topic. Would you cry a tear if you lived during the war and heard Hitler died? How about Ted Bundy? Or the guy who just molested your kid? Would you cry for them?

Fanny, that has got to be one of the most amazing things I've ever seen! Though we can't understand what's being said, you can certainly get the message. Thanks for sharing.