barbara465

I don't think you are being unrealistic. I too read some of what's posted and am amazed. I feel and act as before, only I eat a little less and make better food choices. I chew and chew and don't drink at meals. I can still eat a fair amount and think I don't quite have enough restriction. I can eat in the morning, eat at noon, and eat at night. I haven't had any of things I've seen posted except the two times I was over filled. I'm hoping what I am experience is normal. I hope I can get to a level of restriction that just makes me eat less. PERIOD. No PBing, no waiting until afternoon to eat. I hear you. If you are experiencing some of this maybe you are too tight. I know that isn't what most want to hear. I don't think 600 calories is enough a day either.

I hope when you say you can eat anything that you aren't really eating everything. The time after surgery is the healing time. You should be on a eating program from your doctor - liquids and mushies. I was very hungry after surgery, but I had to use my will power. Until you get your fill, the earliest I've seen is 4 weeks, you are wide open. You have no restriction so if you are not swollen, you can eat lots. Just don't as you don't want your stomach to be working too hard. Some doctors give a slight fill at surgery. You might ask your doctor.

Could you possibly be taking any meds that cause you not to lose weight? It sounds like you are doing everything right. Maybe it's time to talk to the doctor or the staff to see what they see. Are you eating solid protein or are you drinking your calories?

Who are any of us to judge why we have had or are considering WLS? The day of my surgery I saw a woman that was just slightly overweight, in my opinion. Her husband, when talking to mine, said she was about 60 lbs over weight and wanted to do it for herself. Dieting didn't seem to help. I thought she was having her band replaced, as she didn't look like she needed surgery to me. I made the mistake of saying that on this board and got called out for it. And rightfully so. Who am I to critize her motives or what is not acceptable to her? I have lived most of my life heavy. I got an MBA so I could get and hold a better job. I dressed nice so I could get into management. I took public speaking so I could give speeches on technology. I didn't lose weight because I was too busy showing everyone that you could be successful despite the public image of what was acceptable. People stopped me and asked me where I bought my clothes because I always looked nice. I took this as a compliment, but now looking back, maybe it was unusual for an overweight person to look nice in their opinion. How could that be? I tried 10 years ago to have gastric bypass. My doctors said no because of other conditions that I had. Two years ago I met a wonderful man and we were married. He loves me for me and accepted my size. He is of normal weight. So why did I have WLS? The lapband gave me a safer way to lose. I wanted to spend more years with this wonderful man. My health was taking a nose dive. AND I love the way I'm looking these days. We need to get off our high horse as they say and stop judging others. There is no noble reason for having WLS. If we were in control we wouldn't have needed it. If it is good for your health, both physical and mental, go for it. Life can be improved if we take positive steps to make it that way. Society will always be there to judge us. No one is perfect and no one escapes critisim. Our only hope is to be comfortable in our own skin and accept the good with the bad. If WLS improves your life then go for it. It is not up to us to judge your motives. Or you mine.

My husband cooks all our meals. He asks me each day what I want or what I can eat. He doesn't always eat the same things and thats OK with me. This is my choice and I don't feel deprived. He knows what stage I'm in and cooks accordingly. We have learned now to bake only one potato and share and slice thick pork chops into thinner ones. He knows when to put a small container of applesauce by my plate for dipping. I have found that meat is easier when dipped in something. He has learned now that I eat my meat a little rarer because it is more tender. We never reheat certain foods because they become tough. I was back at work after just a few days. The biggest problem was post surgery swelling. I work loose clothes for the 1st month. Your wife might experience that, but vacationing should be just fine. She will enjoy the get away and having food not the focus. Good luck to her and to you for being so supportive.

Terry its good to hear from you. Glad it is going well for you. Your fills must be right on target for no bad effects. That's great. Over fills have been the only times I 've had problems. Slow and steady are good things. I tell myself that every day.

And remember to get the tax exemption for the kids. He will want that, but you should get it. He needs to leave the house now, even if he gets awarded the house in the future. For now, he needs to go. The court usually supports that decision because it is the home of the minor child and a place for the college age child to return. If he gets the house you should still get one half the principal value of the house. Don't fall for the housing market slump for now. You are bargaining and getting what you are entittled. He needs to buy you out or give you 1/2 the value at time of sale. It will need to be worded so you have a say on how it is sold now or in the future. Keeps him from making a deal under the table and on paper selling it for less than you have in it. And just because you grant him the house does not mean he is the custodial parent. The sooner you get him out the sooner you will be off this daily emotional rollercoaster. It is not good to fight out the details of a divorce living under the same roof.

OK this is a big day for me. I went to my closet and pulled out a pair of slacks that are a size 20. I couldn't get into them a few weeks ago. Today, they went on without a problem. In fact, a little big in the leg area and just right in the waist. This is a biggee to me as this is the last Women's size. Next will come regulars. I know that this is just one style and the next size 20 might not fit. But these did. I feel success!!!!!!!! Still have that feeling in my throat. Its not really in my throat and I think its acid reflux without the pain. I'm tempted to take my Aciphex and see if it goes away. I'm afraid to get another fill as this was how I felt when I was overfilled. I'm having no problems and seem to be able to eat anything. If I continue to lose I'll just relax, but the minute I stop I'm off for a fill. Yesterday my DH taped the Oprah show for me. She has this Doctor come on and explain everyday things. Yesterday it was about poop and the stomach and gas and burbs and digestion and heartburn. It was so very interesting and explains why we go through some of the things we do being banded. It put everything in such a good context with clear explanations. I wish everyone that was banded could have seen it. It took some of the mystery out of the side effects we experience. Hope everyone is doing well today. I love this time of year. In Houston there is just the slightest hint of fall. Only going to be in the low 80's today! Enjoy the day.

Laura good for you. You are really making progress. I've heard that a few drinks does make it easier. :girl_hug: We can't do it on a regular basis or we'll gain. However, a few times I've had a margarita I noticed I could eat more. Also, when I've had a few glasses of wine. Keep up the good work. Maybe you won't be able to drink 64 ounces, but at least your drinking more than before.

Oh Reginia I'm so sorry to hear this. You are doing so good on your weight loss program. It seems sometimes when we get one thing in our life going in the right direction, something else goes haywire. Its difficult being in love and watching our love mess it up. It is difficult to accept the things we can't change. That doesn't mean you have to accept bad behavior toward yourself, but you can't bring him to God. Only he can do that. Also, with all the changes going on in your body and your thinking, he might not be able to "catch up". You have lost significant weight. Is that playing in this? All you can do now is take care of you. Give yourself some time. Maybe get some counseling, together or alone. If all else fails, then it fails. Its hard, but sometimes for the best. We're all here for you. Feel free to vent here. We'll all help if we can, and listen if that's all we can do.

I have found it easy to give up drinking with eating, except for breakfast. If we are out or enjoying breakfast at home, I find it difficult to get my 2 cups of coffee in before I eat. I try real hard not to, but I love my coffee on these mornings in particular. I just sip it after I eat and make an effort not to eat again until lunch. I don't think you do any real harm by drinking, except that you don't keep that full part. I'm not sure I have felt that really full feeling. I still struggle with that. I guess I think I should only be able to eat about 4 bites and then be full. I read all these stories on here and think that is normal. Maybe, what I feel is normal. :girl_hug: Going to start weighing my food. That way I'll know for sure.

I have the same problem. They think all fat people have huge legs and butt. I don't. I think its Land's End that will take your measurments and make pants to your size. I thought I would do that when I lose a little more. It would be nice to have pants that fit. Congradulations on the smaller size top. I know that made you feel great!

Post office closed today so mine goes out tomorrow. It was so much fun shopping for my secret Halloween pal. My only problem is that I have to buy the same for myself!

OK Pinky I'm reclaiming the 3 lbs. The scales say I'm down 3.4 lbs from the weigh in at the fill center. I'm taking them!!!!!!!!!!!!!! They are not getting them back and so now I'm on the losing side of this. Hopefully, I can continue and see some results. Feeling pretty good, but I have a little tightness or something in my throat. Ever since the fill I feel like I'm a burb away. Not sure what that is, but I'm being real careful. Notice it more in the morning, but its definitely there. Not sure if its acid reflux without the pain. I'll just watch it and be careful. I don't want to PB with this fill. Hope everyone is doing well. The weather is gorgeous in Houston. We're having a cold wave, 80s in the daytime. :girl_hug:

Updated my signature to show my progress on the October challenge. I'm not doing well on the exercise. I am able to eat more than I want after this fill. I will give it another week and then schedule another one. I've got to get some restriction.

The day of the fill is clear liquids. I'm on liquids for 3 days and then mushies for 3 days then solids after a fill. I have had 2 overfills that didn't get felt until 6-9 days after the fill. I was glad that I had taken it easy after the fills.

I have had 2 PBs, but it was 6-9 days after a fill. The first time I was having Potato soup and the second blended brocolli. Both times I was being a good banster and eating slowly. They were caused by too much fill and went away after an unfill.

I would also tell him you can eat an entire chicken breast. Don't ask me why, but that's what they ask me when I go in for a fill. I guess if you can, then you need a fill. Be assertive. If you are not losing, then you need another fill.

Start calling UHC yourself. As for customer care and get to that representative. They can usually help you. I did that and got approved right away. Get the approval number if they tell you verbally.

First, let me congradulate you on your successful weight loss. You have done a remarkable job. Sometimes we continue to hide in the shell that was once so protective. If we see ourselves as we were, we can continue to be insulated from what we feared. It will take time, but step out of that old body and embrace the new one. See yourself as others see you. Play act if you must until you see the reality of the new you. You may need a few sessions with that doctor. That's OK. Its expected and not unusual. Look at the new you. You are the same wonderful person inside and now the outside reflects your inner beauty. Enjoy!

Hope was born on my 60th birthday! What a precious gift. Glad to hear she is doing so well. You will have your hands full with a Libra. Enjoy her.

Lynn, Glad to hear you are doing fine. Please take it easy as you don't want to overtire yourself. Getting up and moving around will definitely help with the gas pain from surgery. Make sure to drink your Protein drinks and get plenty of Water. Once on mushies you can get real creative. My favorite is refried Beans, chili con queso. I mix them together on my plate. Yummy. Also bean and bacon soup puree. It is very tasty and filling. Just remember that when you do go to solids you might see a little weight gain. During this phase you are healing from surgery and shouldn't be concerned with weight loss. The first fill will start giving you restriction. Right now you are wide open so will be able to eat once the swelling goes down. Good luck on your journey.

I'm in the the challenge. I haven't updated ticker. I plan to do that on Sunday as we agreed. Weighed today and lost a lb of what I gained. This is getting crazy and I think I'll just throw out the scales. Still can't tell about the restriction. I think I have some. At least I feel different than before. Maybe I will be one of the lucky ones that can eat and lose.

Have none of you heard of the Hippa Law? No employer or employees can ask you what or how you are medically? You inform your employer that you require a medical procedure. Period. Tell them when you expect to return and that you might have to go on light duty, i.e., no lifting over 5 lbs for 3 months. I told mine that I was having laproscopic surgery and would return to work the next week. The week of surgery I would work from home as my health permitted. Period. No one asked me what I had done, only how I felt. Now 3 months later people are noticing I'm losing weight. Again, no one has said did you have WLS. Just you look great and a few have said what are you doing. I said eating less. This is a private matter and you should not feel presured to share with anyone. If you do, that is your choice. I'm not embarrased by my surgery, but don't think it needs to be broadcast to the world. The law protects my decision.

and rid your house of all the junk. If you have to go out to get the junk you might be less likely to eat it. If you leave that stuff in the house you will be so tempted to eat it. I found that eating hard Protein fills me up and makes me less likely to eat bad stuff. I have had 3 fills and 2 unfills and haven't found my sweet spot yet. I'm hoping this last one got me a little closer.