wickedme

My strawsssss... There are many since my doc suggested it in Feb and I turned it down.. My risk of stroke, heart disease and diabetes.. Not wanting to go out and be social, fear of never being "ME" again.. Loss of interest in things that were important to me because they are too difficult.. my chin and breast suffocating me when I put on socks and shoes...................My son saying I was too chubby, my husband ignoring me, not letting anyone take pictures of me, or deleting them for the past 5 years... I'm the family Geneologist and the only one without a current photo...

Lellow,, your story is like mine,, finally started getting control of myself, calorie counting and exercise and I broke my leg.. One of my brothers cried in the hospital because he knew how hard I had been trying, swimming in his pool every morning for an hour and walking... It will be a year in August 08 and I am just now able to stand on one foot without severe pain.. My leg will bother me and keep me from really working out until I lose some of the weight.

Vegasgirl.. sooo funny and inspiring.. I too have had the same response in the mirror.. I see myself as a chubby but cute woman pushing 40, until a see three chins in a photo and someone I don't know at all.. I want my life back!

The Bariatric center I am going to go through has a requirement that you need a specific support person.. My sister and a close friend both went to the seminar with me, and I have a husband also.. My sister immediately started naming off all the things I was going to have to change before we even left the building, one being junk food in the house.. which I can't afford, and can't and haven't eaten for more then two years, along with other comments.. My friend called me 2 days after the seminar to tell me she wasn't going through with it because her friend was in the hospital with an ulcer and had to have the band removed... Her friend never quit smoking even after she was aware of the ulcer, and never followed what the doctor told her from the beginning..

Then there is my husband,, I explained to him what the doctors are requiring and that if he wasn't up for it to tell me now.. His biggest concern with this is hes afraid I will get angry if I can't eat what I want to eat??? what?? He said, well yeah, I'll do what you need me to, and in the same sentence started instructing me on nutrition.. (from the man who eats all his daily calories between 6pm and 11 pm) This irritated me and made me laugh at the same time... "I said support, I have a nutritionist and a nagging concience", listening, exercising with me, bringing home fruit instead of icecream, going for a walk,, arghhhh.............. I don't know if he can get it together for me, and my only other option is someone who has their own stuff going on..

Any suggestions on how to make loved ones understand what you need from them?? I'm beginning to think my 11 yr old daughter is my best option!!

From previous surgery experience,, they like to see the nail bed. its one of the best signs that all is well with you blood flow and the anestesia.. I have been asked to remove polish every time,,

would agree with other comment about the bacteria issue too.. fake nails carry a lot of it!

I decided to go through with the surgery some time in MAY and went to a required seminar in June. Got all my paperwork I needed to sign, no pregnacy, smoking, etc. in July,, now just waiting for my first appointment which is with the shrink..

I was totally into this and determined to lose some weight, recording everything I eat,, (for current dietician) and was exercising again.. Now that I'm just waiting for an appointment I'm slipping, how do I stay motivated. The surgery program I am going to put a new notice on their site today, that they are making almost everyone go on a pre diet even if your insurance doesn't require it,, mine doesn't, and that if you gain weight they will postpone your surgery.. I am terrified.. :eek: I have been struggling with weight gain since my hysterectomy(been overweight since early 20's). I stopped gaining when I stopped taking HRT but I have been unable to lose any.. I am swimming regularly, and know I should be doing some more exercising, but I'm eating less then I ever have and still can't lose.. My clothes fit better but these doctors go by the scale not by inches..

I am curious if after meeting with the shrink, and the dietician that I will feel like there is an end to the waiting and it will motivate me to exercise more and do better,,, did this happen for anyone?? Did anyone feel really pumped about the life style change and get really excited about it.. Lately I have found myself getting more depressed about my weight then I ever have before.. I hate going anywhere, and have resorted to long flowing skirts instead of shorts this summer, and hate to go swimming in public.. I have never cared about any of this before...

I know that if they called tomorrow and said I was scheduled for surgery I would not be mentally prepared,, I really feel like I need some guidance. I am truly eating the right foods 95% of the time, but am physically hungry all the time and its driving me crazy.. I have just started taking a new generic form of prilosec for GERD and have had weird stomach pains and pangs since.. Could this be the source of my hunger?? It is making it even harder for me to not give in to overeating and its exhausting me mentally. I have an appointment with the dietician and my PCP next week and will definately ask them what to do,, (drinking Water today when feeling strange)

On a lighter note I have been checking things off of my pre op check list.. Went to a shrink on my own for anxiety and she agreed with me that anti depressants won't work... they make me bi polar (its actually a real diagnosis) I am going to see a Behavioral Therapist for my anxiety and panic attacks.. I have more anxiety then panic due to high stress at home and life in general so I am going to learn some coping skills, and hopefully will be able to teach them to my children and avoid them going through what I am,, and what my mother did. I also am having some long overdue dental work done,, need to chew my food more:biggrin:

I was going to apologize for the ramble, but will just thank anyone for taking the time to read this!!! I am having a difficult time finding a support person who will stick with me through this, and not try to police me!!!

But that is another issue...

Please be very careful and well advised as to why you are bleeding so heavily. It was suggested by my doctor to have the marena put in, I had a bad feeling about it and refused.. Following my gut instinct saved my life because I had adenomyosis, bleeding between the inner and outer lining of the uterus, the marena could have punctured it. I had a complete hyterectomy,, lost after, but gained 47 lbs from HRT.. Whatever you decided to do, make sure they have done extensive ultrasounds before you go forward. This may not be the case for you but better safe then sorry

Thank you all for your ideas.. I had forgotten about the unflavored Jello, , have some in my cupboard.. My mom used to make her own with 100% juice for weightwatchers.. The artificial sweeteners seem to make my reflux worse so I stay away from them.. I too Water down juices a lot because I don't like the sweetness.. Weird because I very rarely pass up chocolate cake ?? Lately me and sugar are not friends, it makes me nauseous, I have replaced the cravings with cheese.. now I need to go to lowfat cheese.. ughhh

Thanks again,, any help is good help!

I really don't like sweeteners at all, but is there any kind of Jello or anything that doesn't have them.. I would rather drink it in the raw then have that stuff in it.. I drink coffee no surgar, ice tea unsweetened, am I going to have to buy a juicer?? Ahhhh The only time I can tolerate a sweetener is in a diet pepsi or Dr. Pepper which I probably have 4 times a year..

I know that broths don't have sugars, but what else is out there?? I'm trying to prepare myself mentally now for what is to come and this happens to be one of my concerns. I've even tried splenda, but unless you use it in something totally acidic like applesauce with cinnamon to hide it, it still tastes bad..

Which brings up another question, I read somewhere that most people can't tolerate cinnamon??? why is that?? I have IBS and diverticulosis so I can understand why popcorn and other things will cause pain, but not a spice like cinnamon.. Maybey I will have to browse through the natural food section for something tasteless.. lol...I guess my hubby was right about being nervous about my food anger issues lol...:incazzato:

You are inspiring to us all..:driving: I too have had surgeries, c-section, abdominal hernia repair that turned out to be endometriosis and c section adhesions, total hysterectomy, broken tib/fib, ... My docs said this would be nothing compared to them, and I have had to reassure my husband of this. I couldn't lift a gallon of milk after hyst do possibility of adhesions for 4 weeks. Family and friends gave me crap about everyone they knew doing things before I did, but I don't have scar tissue or complications and its been 2 years..

I had never heard of the liver issues until now, but know that when I had an ultrasound two years ago they mentioned my was large and had spots on it,, why didn't they tell me what caused it?? No one mentioned it was because I was overweight,, I guess I really need to start the pre diet pre diet or I won't get a gold star...:incazzato:

Hope you healing is uneventful,, wishes of willpower and determination to you:biggrin:

I am just in the beginning phases of this, but am making lists of things I need to do to make this successful, one of them is deffinately Portion Control and cutting out the unnecessary foods in my current diet.. Of course I have done this before to no success or have gained the weight back, but its to set some goals so that when I get to that surgery date I won't be so overwhelmed with having to stop eating everything I like or crave.. I have found myself really overeating these last few days, like its a now or never thing.. (since getting the go ahead from my PCP) Today is a new day, will get my head back on track and get some walking in too..

Is it two weeks for the prediet?? My insurance doesn't require the six months, and I have already been seeing a nutritionist for a year... for that matter for the past 8 years...

Congrats and best wishes Lissap

Tammy,

This is all interesting to me because I have a hiatal hernia and severe reflux.. was hoping to do away with the reflux meds once I stopped over eating.. how big was your hernia and what did they do to fix it?

Is it possible to have a hernia where the band goes so that you wouldn't be able to get banding?

so many questions lol

Thanks for all the support.. I came to the same conclusions yesterday that this is about me, and whether I want to be here to see my children grow up.. My risk of heart disease is escalating every year and the thought of living through a serious stroke scares me to death. My doc told me to tell hubby that he could take care of me for a month now, or for years when I have other problems. I went to see my PCP yesterday and was totally stunned to here she was all for the surgery, and so was everyone else in her practice. I have had some real issues with them agreeing on whats best for me. I have some sleep issues and have for most of my life. Now that I have neck fat and reflux I am starting to get sleep apnea and have woken up coughing and choking lately. They won't prescribe anything until I see a psychiatrist.. I'll go, will have to see one at some point before my surgery is okayed anyways. There is a seminar on the 17th that I have to attend, and my doc will send my referral next week so a lot of the paperwork will already be done..

My hubby and I had another discussion.. he was being selfish and admitted it. He doesn't want to have deal with me being moody because I'm hungry and can't eat what I want to..Lol I have know idea where that came from,, I don't remember stomping my foot and screaming for icecream even when I was pregnant.. He also doesn't want to have to pick up the slack,, or do everything I do, which is everything but washing the kitchen floors, mowing and going to his job everyday. He is okay with things now and was happy for me when I told him my PCP was sending my info to the bariatric surgeon. There are huge waiting lists here so it could be a really long time,, up to nine months before a date is set.. frustrating, but I have things I really need to take care of.. I've played the surgery waiting game with my hysterectomy and I was sick,, I can handle this..

I am going to try to keep everything on the lowdown around here for now with my family and friends.. My sister in law already gave me a big speech about how I can lose the weight on my own,, just do some chi gong?? and some herbs.. lol,, shes a hippy from way back and is 66. I have young kids to take care of and want to be here.. I'm not much on "signs", but when I called my insurance company to see if they would pay for it, the woman who answered had the surgery 3 year ago.. she was my age and her children were the same age as mine at the time. She said she has a whole new life with them and even though the road was rough, she doesn't regret it for a minute..

It might seem frivolous, but I would really love to go dancing again and not be self consious, or out of breath with aching feet lol..

Thanks again ladies, your replies were fabulous

I have been diagnosed with insulin resistance, I had done a lot of reading on it before and was pretty sure that was my problem. My sugar is at 97 right now, but had been higher. I have a family history on both sides for diabetes and don't want it!! My lipid doctor has since said he would really like me to have the surgery. He knows I have tried many times to lose weight, but can't lose much or keep it off for long. I have been over 200 lbs since I was 19, over 140 since 26 and gained another 47 in six months after hysterectomy age 36. I was wondering if anyone gets shakes and cold sweats when their sugar plummets because they haven't had anything or enough to eat, and if it goes away after the surgery?? I try really hard to make sure I have enough Protein all the time to avoid these incidences because each one brings me closer to being diabetic, but some times it just happens.

As I have posted before I would have to run a marathon everyday of the week to make a difference, I don't have the time, physical tolerance or the energy to devote to that. One of the nurses at my docs office said I needed to deal with it, among some other unnecessary comments. I also am still recovering from a spiral fracture of the tib/fib, the rod is causing pain, but the docs won't remove it because of my weight. I would have to be about 160 for a year before they would consider it.. I'm 286,, at this rate I will have to deal with this pain for the rest of my life,, that just isn't an option for me. I had high hopes after my hyst to be more energetic and healthy without the pms and pain,, I don't regret it because I don't have those issues anymore, but the HRT made me even heavier! Will this surgery really make it possible for me to lose the weight??

Thanks Patch.. I have a simon too,, he needs to get some exercise with me!! I'm hoping to get in better shape this summer, swim, walk etc. and get more strenghth back in my leg and ankle so when and if I do go through with the surgery I will be well on my way to better health. Its very frustrating because I had such high hopes for the same outcome after my hyst! I don't regret it at all because I was very ill at the time, but the weight gain has been horrid. I think I would lose my mind if I didn't lose anything even after this!

Thanks Sue, that was very encouraging! The more I read the more I want to get an appointment to start the long process. I am going to go to a seminar right away, and found there are 3 doctors locally who have been doing the surgery for 3 years at least. I am truly at a point where I don't know what else to do..

Thanks for the reply,, It was not so much slow healing, but restrictions of no lifting for a month after hyst, (or major house cleaning), and wheel chair bound for almost 8 weeks with a no weight bearing broken leg (because I was obese),, I'm a little slow coming out of anestesia,, but have figured out through trial and error what works for meds and what makes me ill..

My kids are 7 and 11 and help with chores, hubby just doesn't want to have to deal with all the household stuff if he can avoid it.. hes a little on the selfish side at times..

My doctor mentioned I was a great candidate 4 months ago and I turned him down flat.. Part of me felt I was giving up, the other part worried about what I wouldn't be able to eat>> My fear is about being layed up and complications.

My doc mentioned it again yesterday because I am bordering diabetes, and have physical limitations because of my weight,, one being a healing broken leg. I stay active, coach softball for 10-11 yr olds, run a business, swim whenever possible, play guitar hero..lol, and hiked or walked regularly before my leg accident. I would like to do these things without being exhausted, or having to sit down because of pain.. It would be nice to have day without acid reflux, or discomfort from a hyatal hernia.

My husband does not seem thrilled about the whole thing.. wouldn't even discuss it. I've had two major surgeries with long recovery times and he doesn't want to deal with that again. Two bouts of diverticulitis and kidney stones in the past six months have added to his complaints, and my recent sciatica flare up really ticked him off.. I just got the kids back into some sort of routine again after months of doctors and physical therapy and I don't know whether they are up for another ordeal either...

I am going to make a list of pros and cons to post for my family to respond to and see what happens.. my sister surprised me by supporting me, and two friends are going to go to the seminar next week with me. I have selfish motives, and think my husband has some too.. My kids love me the way I am, but are getting older and their friends are making comments about my weight now, and so are other people..

What kind of reactions and family issues have any of you encountered??

I do overeat, not daily, but food is definately an issue for me.. my first thoughts 4 months ago when my doc first mentioned it was.."I dont' want to not enjoy food" I'm 286, 5'5", solid, and fat distributed fairly even all over,, my belly is definately the worst and am a prime candidate for severe diabetes in the next 10 years if I can't get the weight off.. I appreciate your comments,, I have been called lazy too many times when I am not, and always get on the defensive by listing my attempts.. I really do eat the right foods for the most part, but too much, and can justify the calorie counts because I'm educated enough on nutrition to be able to overeat even on the good stuff and show it on paper.. basically I'm full of BS lol....

I love to cook and love to eat, and do it for many different reasons.. I am working on my mental issues now, and hope to learn some Portion Control over the next few weeks before I see my doc again..

thanks again,, we all need some wakeup calls once in awhile..

Thanks for the encouragement!! I am an eater, love food, , watch my calorie intake, but I would have to run a marathon daily to burn anything off.. I'm making a pros and cons list to post, and am going to let my family add to it over the next few weeks and take it to my next appointment with my doc.. I am getting control of my cholesterol through meds, but diabestes is still looming.. all four of my grandparents had heart and diabetes issues,, my dad too and all 5 brothers.. I have 11 aunts and uncles, only 2 didn't have issues..

I have been overweight for most of my adult life. Big boned was the explanation and quite true in my teens as I was very muscular, broad shouldered and round in the butt.... After miscarriages in my early twenties, two successful pregnancies for beautiful children, and two more miscarriages in between them my weight went crazy. Also I started to get Gerd, arthritis, IBS, diverticulosis, kidney stones and gallbladder issues. After my son was born in 2000 my female issues increased rapidly and I was in pain so much that exercising was intolerable. In 2006 after a year of non stop ER visits and doctor appointments I was diagnosed with Adenomyosis of the uterus. I had a total hysterectomy due to that and pre cancer cells on my cervix, cysts on my ovaries... I was told I absolutely had to take HRT even though I didn't want to. Six months into them I had gained 47 lbs. Believe it or not, I was eating 1500 to 1800 calories a day, swimming or walking 4 miles 4 times a week. I was devestated by what was happening to me and stopped the HRT on my own.. No more hot flashes, anxiety or weight gain.. phewww.. The only problem was I couldn't lose the weight. I went to a nutritionist and kept food journals on sparkpeople.com,, kept exercising and started to become seriously depressed. The only thing that made it worth it was that I didn't have anymore PMS or other female problems or moodswings. My doc said I was BS'ing her and needed to get it together.. Last aug 07 I fell of a landing on the river and shattered my leg.. 2 months in a wheelchair, 6 months physical therapy,, jan to april in a gym.. full exercise 3 days a week for 60 minutes, stationary bike at home 5 days a week and still no weight loss.. We were so broke from me being out of work I couldn't aford to overeat.. total frustration...

My lipid specialist wants to refer me for lap band surgery.. I'm terrified of being layed up again, but fear onset of diabetes, heart attack and stroke.. I have 2 brothers who had attacks at age 50, one wasn't even overweight. I also fear that after I go through with the surgery that it won't help because of my hormone issues..

Has anyone had lap band after hysterectomy and been helped???:confused2: