diva

This is my second marriage. I don't think there is really just one person who could be "the one". It all takes work and compromise and...timing. I really believe that. My husband is romantic and wonderful, it took me 42 years to find him. But he lived in MA and I lived in NY. We met at a mutual friend's wedding in Florida (!). Right place and right time for both of us. A few years earlier-it wouldn't have worked.

"We're with the Band"

BTW- Iam 5'2", weigh 276, hubby is 6'2" and weighs about 375. I am trying to get banded by summer. Trying to talk hubby into it too. I can assure you all that I take up quite a bit of space with my butt. Don't let anyone or anybody make you feel bad about paying your money and flying. But always pack patience and humor! Love, Diva in MA

Hi all, I fly a lot. I am also shaped like really big pear. I also have been routinely asking for a seatbelt extender for years. Sometimes you need it and sometimes not depends on the airline. Sometimes you just need that extra inch and not the whole thing, but it will make your flying way more comfortable!!! I basically ask the flight attendent the minute I board, "May I please have a seatbelt extender?" I politely stand to the side and say "I'd rather take it to my seat myself, I just wait here out of the way, thank you so much." (As you enter the plan, the extender will be located right above her/his head in a cabinet.) I do not let her ask me my seat # and tell me she'll bring it over later. Because she/he is busy, will more than likely forget and then you either have to press the call button to ask again OR she/he comes sailing down the aisle asking everyone who looks fat, "did you ask me for a seatbelt extender?". The extender is really a safety issue. I always leave my seatbelt on even when the sign is off just in case of turbulance. It also allows some wiggle room which you need on loooonnnng flights for comfort and for preventing clots The smaller regional airlines like American Eagle or Delta Express where they have 30-50 seats max is where most everyone could use an extender. Smaller plane, smaller seats = smaller seat belts! The only airline I will not fly unless I need it for a funeral is Southwest. They will take one look at you and ask you to pay for an additional seat. I have never had it happen to me but friends have gone through it and they show it happening on the realtiy tv show "Airline" that features Southwest. They will communicate by walkie talkie or phone that they have a "POS" or "Person of size" and the POS will need another seat. I have never ever seen any other large airline do this. If they do it is certainly done with tact if the passenger is extremely large but they don't start yelling "we have a POS!". And I have flown Continental, Delta, American, United, Airtran, AlItalia, British Air, Northwest and USAir. My husband is a really huge guy (trying to get him to band with me), when he flies he just goes right up to the check in agent and asks them to please change whatever seat he has to the emergency exit (way more leg room!!!) or he asks if the plane isn't full could he please have a seat where the middle seat is empty. He explains that this is for the other passenger's comfort not only his own. They take a look at him and try to help him out about 99% of the time. I take up space on the seat, he takes up space at the shoulder level. I have even joked with flight attendents that I use my hips for good not evil! Two things to remember-even if you take up a little more space than the average passenger it is only for a short period of time. Your fat is not the only inconvenience passengers put up with. The seats get smaller all the time. People with colds sneezing on you, people who never heard about deodorent, people who push the seat all the way back so your legs are around your neck, people who carry on so much luggage it knocks you in the head as they swing it down the aisle, the person who talks non-stop while you might be trying to work, the person whose breath could knock out a horse! So don't feel guilty or bad or embarressed. It is ok to ask if your seatmate minds if you put up the arm rests. A rule of seatbelt extender etiquette (sp?)-return the extender on your way out and thank them. They will love you. Keep using those hips for good not evil!! Love, Diva

Hi, Ok so I'm filling out my paperwork, I've chosen the hospital, I've made the decision to get banded, hopefully by the summer. You all are great and patient with questions from crazed, nervous newbies like me. Here is a really dorky question. Say I am banded, I am losing weight. 8 months to a year go by. At the end of the first year I have the opportunity to travel to Italy on food/wine tour :phanvan. This may actually happen next summer. If I get a complete unfill and left with no fill at all for the duration of the tour (13 days), will I be able to eat/drink somewhat normally? No complete pig out but more than I would with a fill. I know it is insane to ask this even before I get banded. Please don't flame me, it is a real questions even though it is a slightly crazy question. Thanks in advance. You can stop laughing now. Love, Diva 275 lbs. 50.3 BMI and whopping 5'2"

Thank you Bensum and Showboat girl, even Leigh Ann, I hear the concern and the sound advice. I wrote the previous note before I saw Bensum and Showboats answers. Anyway. I thank you all for taking the time to answer. Love, Diva

:: I just knew that somehow my commitment would be questioned. I hesitated to ask this. I have been seriously looking into wls for a few years. I am an adult, I understand the idea of commitment. If anything this forum has made me even more cautious since the official literature doesn't give the honest information that the veterans on this list have given me. I don't go into this easily or with the idea that the band will not be extremely hard work. It is a tool. I want to live and not die of complications of my weight. It has held me back for too many years to discuss. However, I want to live. The tour I am referring to is a geneology vacation with my Mom. We will be visiting relatives we have never met in very very small towns in Sicily. It is once in a lifetime. And...more than a year away since I am hoping to get banded by June. I don't have any intention of putting off the surgery due to this possible trip. I was really sincerely hoping not to open up a pandora's judgemental box. My question was about eating, dorky yes but cavelier no. I was wondering how one feels after a year of being banded, being successful at losing some weight and then being unfilled for an extremely short period of time. ::scared:: Thanks for answering though. I do sincerely appreciate it. And again, this group is truly terrific. Love, Diva

Hi all, I had just started to look into getting banded, found this terrific group and then had to stop for a while due to some family issues. But I am back and I still thank heaven you all are here. I have been reading some back posts and found some info on vanguard type of band. I am totally confused. Is there 2 types of lap band companies or brands? Are they both available in the the US (I am choosing a Boston hospital since I live outsid Boston)? Is one supposed be more up to date, hard to erode? And one more question, if your insurance pays for the surgery do they usually pay for the fills or unfills? I know all insurance are different but generally speaking. Do they pay for the surgery and then let you sink or swim with fill fees? ::eek:: There is so much to know. Thank you all very kindly for answering and thanks for being here Love, Diva

Thanks so much! Are they both made by the same manuf.? Iamed? Is one better than the other when it comes to erosion? -diva

:kiss2: Hi all, I am new, considering getting banded. I live in Boston, 5'2" and about 275# and am 50 years old. I've been doing some research but I have a really wierd question. Is it possible to get banded with local anesthesia (sp?)? I have terrible apnea and have a fear of general-like I won't wake up. I keep thinking that women have ceasareans all the time and they are awake to see the baby, no? Have any of you ever hear of getting a local for the surgery? Also, anyone been banded in Boston? (Sounds like a book or tv series "Banded in Boston" starring Tom Cruise and Star Jones!) LOL! Thank you all in advance for all your help and advice. I've been reading some of the threads and you all sound great. Love, Diva

Hi, Anyone out there get banded in Boston? I am considering getting banded and am looking into Tufts and Mass General. Any suggestions, ideas, hints or cautions? Thank you all! Love, Diva

Hi and thank you everyone! I am thinking of going to Tufts. Anyone out there use Tufts New England Medical Center???? I would really appreciate talking to them. Thank you all again! Love, Diva

Hi, Can someone please explain about BMI? I see it means Body Mass Index but what does that mean exactly? I have also seen references on this list that there are some levels of BMI that are too low to have a band. And that there are some levels of BMI that are so hight it is imperative to get the band? How is it measured? Can it be measure on your own or is it a blood test? Thank you all in advance! Love, Diva

Newbie here, making the decision to get banded. I understand that there is a pre-surgery diet with nutrisytem, liquids and soft foods for about 2 weeks or so? I know that whenever I get legit hungry (like no breakfast and its noon) not just when I have an appetite that I get a headache. A real nasty headache. I also get cranky or to be frank...bi$%&chy. I am going through menopause so it just a hormonal roller coaster anyway. How do you get through those weeks with that strict strict diet before you have the surgery to get banded???? I can't imagine what a pain I will be to live with or work with. Thanks so much Best- Diva who might just move into a hotel and go on sabbatical for the pre surgery diet to keep friends and family safe!

Yowza, nobody out there from MA??? Thats kind of wierd. Well, I'll keep hoping and reading! Love, Diva in Bah-ston

Thank you all! I really appreciate you all answering. The whole thing is scary. But no more scary than waking up in the middle of the night gasping for air (the cpap is hard for me I have some claustraphobia issues). I haven't been under since I got my tonsils out at age 5 (45 years ago!). You all make sense. Love, snorkeling, snoring Divea

Wow, thank you all for answering! The apnea thing is what is getting me-about gasping during surgery. But I guess apnea is something that a lot of people who need the band suffer from. My husband says I snore so loud he can't understand why I don't wake up too. Based on what you all are telling me, it looks like they never band under spinal or local. Anyone band in Boston? Thankyou all so much again for taking the time to answer me. Love, Snoring Diva

Hi, I am new. Very glad to have found such a great forum. I am in the process of considering getting banded. Right now I am checking out the hospitals and doctors in the area. I live in Bostonand am 50. It is time to make the decision to do something. I appreciate all the information, sympathy and empathy you all put into these forums! So thanks ahead of time! Love, Diva:kiss2:

Thank you Lianna! I know I sound like a baby! I have not decided to get banded as of yet, I'm doing a lot of research. I think I will be be getting it. Love, Diva